Marriage and Family - Chapter 1 PDF

MARRIAGE AND FAMILY CHAPTER 1 EMERGING REALITIES  Specific Objectives: at the end of the chapter, the students are expected to: 1. Have a clear understanding of Christian teachings regarding the nature and realities of marriage 2. Identify some specific instructions and...

MARRIAGE AND FAMILY CHAPTER 1 EMERGING REALITIES  Specific Objectives: at the end of the chapter, the students are expected to: 1. Have a clear understanding of Christian teachings regarding the nature and realities of marriage 2. Identify some specific instructions and clarifications God gives couples to fulfill his plan for them. 3. Analyze why and how Adam and Eve’s disobedience disturbed the whole plan of God.  LESSON 1: BASIC REALITIES Marriage is BOTH: Human secular reality and a sacred reality – Given by God the Creator – To be received with gratitude to God and lived according to His plan – Calling the spouses to give themselves to each other and to accept each other completely Marriage: Love and Life 3 in the Divine Plan  LESSON 1: BASIC REALITIES Marriage is MYSTERION or a SACRAMENT: “ a sign of a higher and sacred reality which entered salvation.” Marriage is a divine and human institution. Marriage as an officium naturae or a “duty of nature” = procreation. God, the author of nature, entrusted this specific goal marital partnership =human institution. Marriage: Love and Life 4 in the Divine Plan  LESSON 1: BASIC REALITIES Marriage is MYSTERION or a SACRAMENT: “ a sign of a higher and sacred reality which entered salvation.” Marriage is a divine and human institution. Marriage as an officium naturae or a “duty of nature” = procreation. God, the author of nature, entrusted this specific goal marital partnership =human institution. Marriage: Love and Life 5 in the Divine Plan  LESSON 1: BASIC REALITIES Marriage is a natural blessing or gift – Given by God the Creator – To be received with gratitude to God and lived according to His plan – Calling the spouses to give themselves to each other and to accept each other completely Marriage: Love and Life 6 in the Divine Plan  A Natural and Supernatural Gift Marriage is a natural blessing or gift – Benefiting the community Through the bearing and raising of children Serving the needs of others Witnessing to God’s love Marriage: Love and Life 7 in the Divine Plan  HELPING EACH OTHER GROW IN LOVE Marriage established by God for two reasons: 1. The good of the husband and wife To help each other understand and experience true love; draws each other closer to God 2. The procreation and education of children The effects of the Sacrament are directed towards the spouse and any children as well. Marriage: Contract or Covenant? What is a contract? Can you name some characteristics of a contract? A contract... is binding for the time of the agreement and can be broken. is a basic time-limited guarantee that can be extended longer for more money. guarantees that you can return (or get a refund for) the product or service if it fails to deliver on expectations. is limited: you can trade for a new, improved model when contract expires and usefulness ends. is relative to your “investment”; the more you pay, the fancier or more powerful the “model” or the better the service. Can you think of others? In contrast to a contract, a covenant... cannot be broken; has no “time limit” until death. is a sacred life relationship between two people. is open-ended; no guarantees! continues under all conditions: money or poverty, health or sickness, etc. is rooted in deep friendship and love, not in money or power. Can you think of others?  CONTRACT MARRIAGE COVENANT MARRIAGE Terms based upon the compliance of the other Terms based upon a promise given to comply. person. Example: I will love you if you love me. I Example: I will love you. I will be faithful. will be faithful if you will be faithful. Failure to comply releases the other party from Your failure to comply does not change my the agreement. Example: Since you don't love me, promise to comply. Example: Even though you I don't love you. Since you haven't been faithful to don't love me, I still love you. Even if you're not me, I don't have to be faithful to you. faithful, I will remain faithful. Contract marriage is over when promises are A covenant marriage is over when the one completed or broken. Example: Since you did not making the promise dies. Example: The duration fulfill your end of the deal, our contract is broken. of our covenant is "until death". You are released from your contract. Contract marriage maintains separate All belongings are held in common by both belongings. Example: This is my car, this is money. covenant partners. Example: This is our money, He is your son. my step-son is now our son. Witnessed by the state. Example: getting married Witnessed by God. Example: getting married in a in front of a justice of the peace. Church before God and the community Is an exchange of goods and services. Example: I Is an exchange of people. Example: I am yours will mow the grass and you will do the cooking. and you are mine. Typically ratified by a signature. Example: I Typically ratified through “cutting a covenant.” signed a contract with CapitalOne to pay off my In ancient times, those entering into an agreement car loan. with each other would slay an animal and cut the parts of it in half. They would lay the halves along a path, then walk in the midst of the path to cement the agreement. This was symbolic of the fact that the success of the covenant was contingent upon each performing his part of the bargain. Examples: Examples: 1. prostitution vs. marriage 2. indentured servitude vs. kinship 3. babysitting vs. parenting Bible Covenants  What Is a Covenant? A solemn agreement between human beings or between God and a human being in which Image in public domain mutual commitments are made.  A Covenant with God? The concept of a covenant between God and his People is one of the most central themes of the Bible. In the biblical sense, a covenant implies much more than a contract or a simple agreement between two parties.  A Promise Is a Promise The word for covenant in the Old Testament gives new meaning to this idea. It comes from a Hebrew root word that means “to cut.” This explains the strange custom of two people passing through the cut bodies of slain animals after making an agreement. Such a ceremony always accompanied the making of a covenant in the Old Testament.  Blessings and... A covenant often promises specific benefits, rewards, or blessings for people who keep the terms of the agreement. But they also threaten sanctions, punishments, or curses for people who break the terms of the contract.  Conditional Covenant With a conditional covenant, the terms of the covenant depend on the one receiving the covenant, not on the one granting it. The receiver must meet certain obligations or conditions of the covenant before the giver of the covenant is obligated to fulfill what was promised. Image in public domain  Unconditional Covenant With an unconditional covenant, fulfillment for what is promised depends solely upon the authority and integrity of the one making the covenant. It is a promise with no “if” attached to it. Image in public domain  Covenants in the Bible The first two apply to all human beings. The next three apply specifically to the Jews, the “Children of Abraham.”  Old Testament Covenants Adam and Eve Noah and his family Abraham and his descendants Moses and the Israelites David and the Kingdom Adam and Eve Image in public domain  The Edenic Covenant (Innocence) This outlined man’s responsibility toward creation and God’s directive regarding the tree of knowledge of islandcrisis.net good and evil. The Adamic Covenant (Grace) This included the curses pronounced against mankind for the sin of Adam and Eve, as well as God’s provision for that sin. Image in public domain  Noah and His Family This was an unconditional Covenant between God and Noah (specifically) and humanity (generally). God gave the rainbow as the sign of the Covenant, a promise that God would never again destroy all life Image in public domain on earth with a flood. This is a reminder that God Abraham and His Descendants God promised many things to Abraham: He promised that he would make Abraham’s name great. He promised that Abraham would Image in public domain have numerous descendants.  Abraham God also made promises regarding a nation called Israel. Another promise is that the families of the world will be blessed through the line of Abraham. (This is a reference to the Messiah, who would come from this line.) Image in public domain  Abraham Is Foremost God’s Covenant with Abraham is absolutely unconditional! It is everlasting. It is one of the most profound in the Image in public domain Scriptures. Moses and the Israelites The Mosaic Covenant was a conditional covenant. It brought either God’s direct blessing (if they followed his Laws) or God’s direct cursing (for disobedience). Image in public domain  Mosaic Law Part of the Covenant was the Ten Commandments, but there was also the rest of the Law, which contained more than six hundred commands— roughly three hundred positive and three hundred negative. The history books of the Old Testament (Joshua–Esther) Image in public domain detail how Israel succeeded, or failed, at obeying the Law.  Mosaic Covenant The Ten Commandments are a summation of the Mosaic Law.  David and the Kingdom The Davidic Covenant amplifies the “seed” aspect that was detailed in the Abrahamic Covenant. God promises that David’s physical line of descent will last Image in public domain forever and that his kingdom will never  David’s “House” God will establish forever David’s “house,” the royal dynasty through David’s descendants. David’s son (Solomon) will build God’s “house,” the first Temple of Jerusalem. The “sign” of this covenant will be the descendants of David and the Temple itself. Image in public domain  David’s Throne David’s throne has not been in place at all times. There would come a time, however, when someone from the line of David would again sit on the throne and rule as king. Image in public domain This Future King: Jesus Image in public domain  The New Covenant The New Testament makes clear a distinction between the Covenants of the Old Testament and the Covenant of the New Testament. Saint Paul speaks of these “two covenants,” one originating “from Mount Sinai” and the other from “the Jerusalem above” (Galatians 4:24– 26). Image in public domain  New Covenant The death of Christ ushered in the New Covenant, under which we are justified by God’s grace and mercy. It is now possible to have the true forgiveness of sin. Jesus himself is the Mediator of this better Covenant between God and Image in public domain man. Jesus’ sacrificial death served as the oath, which God made to us to seal this New Covenant.  A New Agreement The New Covenant is the new agreement God has made with mankind, based on the death and Resurrection of Jesus Christ. The concept of the New Covenant originated with the promise of Jeremiah that God would accomplish for his People what the Old Image in public domain Covenants had failed to do (due to humankind’s sins and flaws).  Christ as Covenant At the Last Supper, Jesus spoke of the cup, saying, “This is my blood of the covenant, which will be shed on behalf of many for the forgiveness of sins” (Matthew 26:28). Image in public domain  New Life through Covenant Under this New Covenant, God would write his Law on human hearts. ©prayerfulorgodfull.blogspot.com  A Review Five major Covenants of the Old Testament: – Adam and Eve – Noah – Abraham – Moses – David The New Covenant Image in public domain – Secured by Christ – Removal of sin – Cleansing of the conscience  LESSON 2: THE PURPOSE OF MARRIAGE IN CREATION Sacred Scripture begins with the creation of man and woman made in the image and likeness of God. God Himself is the author of marriage. The vocation to marriage is written in the very nature of man and woman. Marriage: Love and Life 43 in the Divine Plan God is love and he created man and woman so that their mutual love becomes an image of the absolute and unfailing love with which God loves mankind. According to Scripture this love of man and woman is intended to be fruitful and to be realized in the common work of watching over creation. God said to Adam and Eve: 'be fruitful, multiply fill the earth and subdue it' Scripture affirms that man and woman were created for one another - 'a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh'. The book of Genesis also says: 'it is not good for man to be alone', let us make him a helpmate which is bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh'  Marriage under the regime of sin Since there is sin in us and in the world around us, it finds its way also into the relationship of man and woman. The union can be threatened by discord, infidelity, jealousy and domination. The battle of the sexes stems from man's sinful nature. When Adam and Eve sinned they first ruptured their relationship with God and then their relationship with each other. Their mutual attraction of man and woman - God's gift, can so easily be degraded by domination and lust.  A Natural and Supernatural Gift The natural blessing of marriage was distorted, but not lost, by original sin. Marriage: Love and Life 47 in the Divine Plan  LESSON 3: MARRIAGE AS REALIZED AMONG THE CHOSEN PEOPLE In Hebrew scripture women are subordinate Their status were determined by their status in relation to men: as daughters, wives and mothers Their primary function is bearing children who would continue the male line (Shannon and cahill, 1988) A chain of succession of generations (Fuchs, 1983)  Marriage for procreation Polygamous relationships were even allowed until about the time of the monarchy, the Kings (Gen 29: 21-30, Sam 5:13-16) Divorce, initiated by the husband only, was a usual practice Barreness or inability to have children is a disgrace (Gen 30:2) Concubinages was tolerated as a means to find a substitute for the barren wife, to continue the succession of husband’s lineage or family line Levitical law (Dt 25:5-10) The prophetic vision of marriage as a covenant Prophet Hosea was first to see the relationship of husband and wife as a covenant. He compared marriage with the covenant between God and Israel (Clifford 1994). The story of Hosea and wife Gomer shows the love of Yahweh to his people Israel in spite of their repeated unfaithfulness.  RECAP AUGUST 28, 2024  Marriage Restored in Christ Through Baptism, men and women are transformed, by the power of the Holy Spirit, into a new creation in Christ.48 This new life in the Holy Spirit heals men and women from sin and elevates them to share in God‘s very own divine life. It is within this new Christian context that Jesus has raised marriage between the baptized to the dignity of a sacrament. He heals marriage and restores it to its original purity of permanent self-giving in one flesh (see Mt 19:6).  In restoring to marriage its original meaning and beauty, Jesus proclaims what the Creator meant marriage to be ―in the beginning. He does so because marriage will be made into the visible embodiment of his love for the Church. In his espousal of the Church as his Bride, he fulfills and elevates marriage. He reveals his own love ―to the end‖ (Jn 13:1) as the purest and deepest love, the perfection of all love. In doing this he reveals the deepest meaning of all marital love: self-giving love modeled on God‘s inner life and love.  In marriage a man and a woman are united with each other, and the two become one flesh, so that they each love the other as they love themselves and cherish each other‘s bodies as their own. This union is an image of the relationship between Christ and his Church: He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one hates his own flesh but rather nourishes and cherishes it, even as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. ―For this reason a man shall leave [his] father and [his] mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.This is a great mystery, but I speak in reference to Christ and the church. (Eph 5:28-32) God Protects Sexual Relationships Adultery – He warns adulterers (those married who have sex outside of marriage) and fornicators (the unmarried having sex) that they will be punished with hell, apart from repentance and faith in Christ (1 Cor. 6:9-10, 18). – God sees all our sexual behavior, even in darkness (Prov. 5:21)--as He did King David’s (2 Sam. 12:9). 55  Steps Toward Adultery This begins in the heart, by watching another’s partner (Prov. 4:23; 6:25; Matt. 15:19), or watching a virgin (Job 31:1). We make provision for the flesh (Rom. 13:12-14) when we allow unholy liberties with our eyes, including what we see on TV, videos, the Web and in magazines and books. This is self-destructive behavior (Dr. Laura Schlesinger), because it cannot be satisfied within the will of God. Pornography offends the spouse and puts ungodly pressure on the sexual relationship. 56  Antidotes to Adultery If you’re unmarried and cannot control yourself, marry (1 Cor. 7:9). However, marriage obviously doesn’t solve the problem of illicit sexual relations or there would be no adultery (Bill Gothard). A joyful marriage—including rejoicing in each other sexually—is perhaps the best antidote (Prov. 5:15-19, Song of Solomon 4). 57  Why Say “No” A woman who gives away her virginity without the vows of marriage is incredibly blind or ignorant. She squanders her purity and her body and the man takes advantage of her, taking without giving security. According to one study, only 10% of those living together unmarried eventually marry each other. “Why buy the cow, when you can have the milk for free?” There is little leverage for marriage 58 left (Jehosaphat Wanyama).  Divorce Jesus taught that divorce is not preferred and emphasized the permanence of marriage. While he acknowledged the provision for divorce in cases of sexual immorality, he did not endorse it as a desirable or unconditional option. Instead, he reinforced that sacramental marriages should remain intact and cannot be easily dissolved. 59  Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery” (Matt 19:8-9, NIV).  Conflict, quarrels, and misunderstandings can be found in all marriages. They reflect the impact of Original Sin, which ―disrupted the original communion of man and woman.They also reflect modern stresses upon marriage: the conflict between work and home, economic hardships, and social expectations.  In some cases, divorce may be the only solution to a morally unacceptable situation. A specific example is a home where the safety of a spouse and children is at risk. See Malachi 2:13-16. Is divorce always sinful? “It can happen that one of the spouses is the innocent victim of a divorce decreed by civil law; this spouse has therefore not contravened the moral law.” CCC 2386  The Pharisaic debate and Jesus’ teaching. The “exception clauses” in Matthew? Exception Clauses-Translations 1. “except for unchastity” 2. “unless the marriage is unlawful” 3. “except it be for fornication” 4. “lewd conduct is a separate case”  Three Catholic theories of the exception clause 1. Jesus meant that divorce would be permissible in case of adultery, but remarriage is still forbidden. 2. Jesus meant that divorce and remarriage are permitted only if the original marriage was unlawful, such as incestuous marriages. 3. Jesus meant the “exception clause” to be a parenthetical that excludes OT grounds for divorce. Something like “Whoever divorces his wife—and I’m setting aside all excuses, like adultery—and marries another commits adultery.”  Divorce Apostles Paul and Peter stressed winning the unbeliever to Christ (1 Cor. 7:16; 1 Pet. 3:1-2). The assumption is that either husband or wife became a Christian after marriage. But God has also called us to live in peace (1 Cor. 7:15). If an unbeliever wants to leave, the believer will have more peace not interfering. The Bible is silent regarding other grounds. Much that is legal divorce (as for “incompatibility” or “irreconcilable differences”) is unscriptural and therefore sinful. 65  Divorce God “hates” divorce (Mal. 3:15-16). Divorce for other than adultery or desertion (some would extend it to desertion by a believer), makes either husband or wife liable to the charge of adultery upon further sexual relations. – From God’s perspective, they are still married (Matt. 19:9). – Therefore be very careful who you marry (Matt. 19:10-11). – If a polygamist becomes a Christian, it is better to continue to care for his wives and their children, instead of divorcing them, making the situation worse. 66  Annulment A decree of nullity A formal Church decree that what appeared externally to be a valid marriage was not, on account of some defect or impediment that existed at the time of the wedding ceremony  Some common reasons for a decree of nullity include: Lack of Consent: One or both parties did not fully and freely consent to the marriage. Impediments: There were certain obstacles that prevented a valid marriage, such as one party being already married, being too closely related, or being underage. Defects in Form: The marriage ceremony did not follow the required form of the Church (e.g., not performed by a validly ordained minister). Mental Incapacity: One or both parties were not psychologically capable of understanding the nature of marriage or of assuming its essential obligations.  Annulment grounds 1. Coercion or duress 2. Fraud 3. Youth 4. Consanguinity 5. A Catholic is involved and the Catholic form was not observed 6. A prior marriage that has never been decreed null (and the ex-spouse is still living) 7. A firm intention against openness to children 8. A firm intention against faithfulness or permanence 9. A grave defect of discretion of judgment concerning the essential matrimonial rights and duties  After an annulment is granted. 1. The parties are free to marry in the Church. 2. Usually with the proviso that they must have a “marriage readiness assessment” first.  Remarriage It’s clearly alright to remarry upon the death of a marriage partner (1 Cor. 7:39-40), but particularly those of childbearing age (1 Tim. 5:14). Good Christians differ on grounds for divorce, but Jesus is clear that if a person divorces due to adultery, he or she doesn’t commit adultery by remarriage. Since the deserted partner is “not bound” (1 Cor. 7:15), presumably to the former partner, there is freedom to remarry a believer (2 Cor. 6:14-17). 71  Singleness Despite the norm being to fill and rule the earth, singleness for the Kingdom was encouraged by both Jesus and Paul (Matt. 19:11-12; 1 Cor. 7:1, 8-9). This enables focus upon the work of God, instead of upon the marriage partner (1 Cor. 7:32-35). Paul was also concerned about the liability of marriage in times of persecution (1 Cor. 7:26). The world climate may or may not be similar today. 72  The Gift Nobody Wants Singleness is a spiritual gift (1 Cor. 7:7). A lack of sexual self-control confirms its absence (1 Cor. 7:9). The history of Christian missions particularly through the 1800s shows that it was largely single men who preached the Gospel in new lands, before the advent of Protestant missions (also mainly begun in the 1800s). 73  Complete in Christ A single Christian finds completion in Christ, just as does any other Christian (Col. 2:9-10). – Singleness doesn’t mean incompleteness, just as marriage doesn’t necessarily mean completeness. The foundation of identity is Christ (Phil. 1:21). – You can be single and happy and you can be married and miserable. – But God didn’t institute marriage for misery’s sake. If we obey Him and depend upon His love (Rom. 5:5), it can be the most beautiful, and exciting human relationship. 74  Prepare a one-page essay Imagine you are friends with a young couple who are having a trouble with each other and are much tempted to break up their marriage. What advice would you tell them? Write down what you would tell them, using your basis on the teachings of Christ in this lesson as your guide. Article 1 of the Family Code (the “Code”) lays down the basic premise of our laws on marriage “ Marriage is a special contract of permanent union between a man and a woman entered into in accordance with law for the establishment of conjugal and family life. It is the foundation of the family and an inviolable social institution whose nature, consequences, and incidents are governed by law and not subject to stipulation, except that marriage settlements may fix the property relations during the marriage within the limits provided by this Code.”  Marriage is a very special contract in that: The parties must be male and female. Actually , the Supreme Court has already stated that in a marriage contract, there are, in fact, 3 parties: the man, the woman and the State, considering that the State provides for the duties, privileges and restrictions which are deemed written into every marriage contract. Unlike ordinary contracts which may be terminated or rescinded by the parties upon mutual agreement, the marital bonds can only be severed by death, or upon a court declaration of nullity or annulment; The rights and obligation of the parties are not subject to stipulation by the parties and are fixed by law; and Breach of the marital contract does not give rise to an action for damages.  ESSENTIAL REQUISITES Legal capacity of the contracting parties who MUST be at least 18 years old, male and female, and not under any impediment to marry. Consent freely given in the presence of the solemnizing officer. (Art. 2, Family Code) THEME 1: A Natural and Supernatural Gift Christ restored and elevated marriage. – Marriage between two baptized people is a sacrament. – Christian marriage is a sign of Christ’s love for the Church. – Christian spouses help each other to grow in holiness and lead each other to heaven. Marriage: Love and Life 79 in the Divine Plan  THEME 2: Unique Union of a Man and a Woman Creation stories in Genesis show that: – Man and woman are created in God’s image, “male and female He created them” (Gn. 1:27) – Men and women are equal in dignity – Both sexes are necessary for God’s plan Marriage: Love and Life 80 in the Divine Plan  THEME 2: Unique Union of a Man and a Woman A man and a woman—husband and wife— uniquely complement each other; they are made for each other (“bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh”—Gn. 2:23). – The differences between men and women are more than biological. – They are also evident in the ways that men and women think, act, and communicate. Marriage: Love and Life 81 in the Divine Plan  THEME 2: Unique Union of a Man and a Woman Only a man and a woman can form the intimate union of love and life called marriage. – The couple is called to love like God by giving themselves to others. – Their union is unique because of its potential to bring new life into the world. Marriage: Love and Life 82 in the Divine Plan  THEME 3: Communion of Love and Life Men and women, created in God’s image, are called to love like God. As God is a communion of persons—the Trinity—husband and wife form a communion of persons within their family. Marriage: Love and Life 83 in the Divine Plan  THEME 3: Communion of Love and Life Marriage is a unique communion of persons: – Brings together the totality of a man and a woman: body, mind, soul – For two, inseparable purposes: unitive (love- giving) and procreative (life-giving) Marriage: Love and Life 84 in the Divine Plan  THEME 3: Communion of Love and Life In exchanging marital consent the spouses: – Establish a partnership for “the whole of life” – Vow exclusive fidelity – Promise to be open to the procreation and nurture of children – Are empowered to make a “total gift of self” to each other Marriage: Love and Life 85 in the Divine Plan  THEME 3: Communion of Love and Life Sexual intercourse signifies the marital covenant; each act must be open to life. Contraception is wrong because it separates the unitive and the procreative purposes of marriage. Natural methods of family planning respect God’s design for married love. Marriage: Love and Life 86 in the Divine Plan  THEME 4: Sacrament of Christ’s Love Spousal love participates in, and makes present, Christ’s love for his Church Marriage: Love and Life 87 in the Divine Plan  Jesus performs his first miracle at Cana in Galilee. The Church sees this event as confirmation of the goodness of marriage and a sign of Christ's presence in their relationship. God has determined that the matrimonial union of man and woman is indissoluble: "what therefore God has joined together let no one put asunder." Even though this seems a very heavy burden to carry, God Himself will give couples the strength to carry it out. If they take on board Christ's command to renounce themselves and take up their cross, the spouses will have a happy and fulfilled married life.  THEME 4: Sacrament of Christ’s Love Christ’s love for the Church is the model for marital love; thus, marital love is to be: – total – faithful – permanent – life-giving – self-giving Marriage: Love and Life 89 in the Divine Plan  THEME 4: Sacrament of Christ’s Love Matrimony and Holy Orders: Sacraments at the service of communion – Directed toward the service of others – This service leads to personal salvation Marriage: Love and Life 90 in the Divine Plan  THEME 4: Sacrament of Christ’s Love Grace of the Sacrament of Marriage: Jesus will help the couple to continue in love even when it seems impossible. Marriage: Love and Life 91 in the Divine Plan  THEME 5: Foundation of the Family and Society Marriage is the foundation of the family and society Marital love is life-giving to: – children, the supreme gift of marriage – extended family – neighbors and the wider community Marriage: Love and Life 92 in the Divine Plan  THEME 5: Foundation of the Family and Society Husband and wife create a “domestic church” that mirrors the gathered Church: – Characterized by care for each other and growth in faith – Children are taught how to pray, follow the commandments, and grow in virtue – Members are nourished by the Eucharist Marriage: Love and Life 93 in the Divine Plan  THEME 5: Foundation of the Family and Society Familial love overflows to embrace the world. Through service to society, the family helps to build up the Kingdom of God. Marriage: Love and Life 94 in the Divine Plan  THEME 6: Journey of Human and Spiritual Growth Human and spiritual growth go together (“Grace builds on nature”). Spiritual growth—growth in holiness— means growing in virtue. For married couples, the goal is to image Christ’s love for His Church. Marriage: Love and Life 95 in the Divine Plan  THEME 6: Journey of Human and Spiritual Growth Foundational virtues: – Faith – Hope – Charity Marriage: Love and Life 96 in the Divine Plan  THEME 6: Journey of Human and Spiritual Growth Moral virtues: – Prudence – Justice – Fortitude – Temperance Marriage: Love and Life 97 in the Divine Plan  THEME 6: Journey of Human and Spiritual Growth Marriage is a vocation: – A call from God – As necessary and authentic as other vocations in the Church – A specific way to respond to the universal call to holiness – An imitation of Christ’s self-giving love Marriage: Love and Life 98 in the Divine Plan  THEME 7: School of Love and Gratitude Recognizing each other as God’s gift is an ongoing call. This recognition leads to gratitude which helps the couple to persevere in charity. Marriage: Love and Life 99 in the Divine Plan  THEME 7: School of Love and Gratitude Gratitude opens the spouses to receive further gifts, especially the gift of children. Spouses are called to be open to anyone in need. Marriage: Love and Life 100 in the Divine Plan  THEME 7: School of Love and Gratitude Spouses are grateful to God for the gift of the Eucharist: – Christ dwells with the couple – He sustains and renews their marriage covenant Marriage: Love and Life 101 in the Divine Plan  THEME 7: School of Love and Gratitude Growing in Christ’s love changes the Christian couple. – They become a sign of the Kingdom of God. – They become a blessing and gift to each other and to the world. – They become a sign of hope in Christ’s power to transform hearts. Marriage: Love and Life 102 in the Divine Plan  The Sacrament in which a baptized man and a baptized woman make a lifelong commitment of themselves to each other as husband and wife and through which they are given the grace to live out the commitment. Marriage The Sacrament in which a baptized man and a baptized woman make a lifelong commitment of themselves to each other as husband and wife and through which they are given the grace to live out the commitment. Sacraments are: 1 Efficacious signs of Efficacious: having the grace power to produce a desired effect The visible rites by which the sacraments are celebrated signify and God’s life in us! make present the graces proper to each sacrament. They bear fruit in those who receive them with the required dispositions*. CCC 1131  The Sacrament in which a baptized man and a baptized woman make a lifelong commitment of themselves to each other as husband and wife and through which they are given the grace to live out the commitment. 2 GOD himself created marriage! Efficacious signs of “Man and woman are “made grace, instituted by for each other”. The Lord Christ and entrusted to God said: “It is not good for the man to be alone, I the Church will make a suitable partner for him” (Gn 2:19-20) “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, and the two become one body” (Gn 2:24)  Theology of the Body God who created man out of love also calls him to love -- the fundamental and innate vocation of every human being. For man is created in the image and likeness of God who is himself love. Since God created him man and woman, their mutual love becomes an image of the absolute and unfailing love with which God loves man. It is good, very good, in the Creator's eyes. And this love which God blesses is intended to be fruitful and to be realized in the common work of watching over creation: "And God blessed them, and God said to them: 'Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth and subdue it.'” CCC 1604 Christ began his public life and mission by changing the water into wine during a wedding at Cana! (Jn 2) Because of the Paschal mystery, marriage is now a Sacrament! Christ entrusted the Church to Peter and through Apostolic Succession, the Holy Spirit has guided the Church to the present day. It is by following Christ, renouncing themselves, and taking up their crosses that spouses will be able to “receive” the original meaning of marriage and live it with the help of Christ. This grace of Christian marriage is a fruit of Christ’s cross, the source of all Christian life. CCC 1615 The Sacrament in which a baptized man and a baptized woman make a lifelong commitment of themselves to each other as husband and wife and through which they are given the grace to live out the commitment. 3 The visible rites by Efficacious signs of which the sacraments grace, instituted by are celebrated signify and make present the Christ and entrusted to graces proper to each the Church by which sacrament. They bear divine life is dispensed fruit in those who receive them with the to us required dispositions*. CCC 1131 Grace = God’s life in us *It is appropriate for the bride and groom to prepare for the celebration of their marriage by receiving the sacrament of penance.  The Sacrament in which a baptized man and a baptized woman make a lifelong commitment of themselves to each other as husband and wife and through which they are given the grace to live out the commitment. Natural Vs Supernatural Eros Agape Philia  Celebration of the Sacrament Marriage is public act which requires a liturgical celebration For couples where one member is not Catholic, the Sacrament is generally celebrated within Both Catholic = During the Mass the Liturgy of the Word In the Eucharist the memorial of the New Covenant is realized, the New Covenant in which Christ has united himself for ever to the Church, his beloved bride for whom he gave himself up. It is therefore fitting that the spouses should seal their consent to give themselves to each other through the offering of their own lives by uniting it to the offering of Christ for his Church made present in the Eucharistic sacrifice, and by receiving the Eucharist so that, communicating in the same Body and the same Blood of Christ, they may form but "one body" in Christ. Minister of the Sacrament The bride and groom in the presence of the Church’s representative Requirements for Reception Able and willing to give free consent No prior bond or other impediments  Essential Elements 1) Free consent of the couple 2) Promise to live in an exclusive life-long faithful commitment to each other 3) Openness to the gift of children from God. 4) Consent given in the presence of the Church’s minister and two witnesses  Effects of the Sacrament 1. Grace to love each other unselfishly, as Christ has loved us. 2. Grace to strengthen the unending nature of their union. 3. The man and woman who marry are both given the help to raise their children in faith and love. The Domestic Church 4. The witness of married couples strengthens the community of the Church and the fabric of society. Family is the basic unit of society!  Teachings about Divorce and Remarriage The Sacrament in which a baptized man and a baptized woman make a lifelong commitment of themselves to each other as husband and wife and through which they are given the grace to live out the commitment. “What God has joined together, no human being must separate” Mt 19:6 In his preaching Jesus unequivocally taught the original meaning of the union of man and woman as the Creator willed it from the beginning. Permission given by Moses to divorce one's wife was a concession to the hardness of hearts. The matrimonial union of man and woman is indissoluble: God himself has determined it "what therefore God has joined together, let no man put asunder.” CCC 1614 This unequivocal insistence on the indissolubility of the marriage bond may have left some perplexed and could seem to be a demand impossible to realize. However, Jesus has not placed on spouses a burden impossible to bear, or too heavy - heavier than the Law of Moses. By coming to restore the original order of creation disturbed by sin, he himself gives the strength and grace to live marriage in the new dimension of the Reign of God. It is by following Christ, renouncing themselves, and taking up their crosses that spouses will be able to "receive" the original meaning of marriage and live it with the help of Christ. This grace of Christian marriage is a fruit of Christ's cross, the source of all Christian life. CCC 1615  “ Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ loved the Church and handed himself over for her to sanctify her…” Eph 5:25-26 Jesus comes into the life of married baptized Christians through the Sacrament of Matrimony. The fruits of the sacrament remain; Jesus remains present with the couple through their entire marriage. In the same way he loves the Church and handed himself over to the Church in his life, Death and Resurrection, husbands and wives love each other with faithfulness that does not end until death, through the daily giving of themselves to the other.  Able and willing to give free consent The Church holds the exchange of consent between the spouses to be the indispensable element that "makes the marriage.” If consent is lacking there is no marriage.** CCC 1626 The consent consists in a "human act by which the partners mutually give themselves to each other": "I take you to be my wife" - "I take you to be my husband.".” This consent that binds the spouses to each other finds its fulfillment in the two "becoming one flesh”. CCC 1627 No prior bond or other impediments  What is an annulment? The consent must be an act of the will of each of the contracting parties, free of coercion or grave external fear. No human power can substitute for this consent. If this freedom is lacking the marriage is invalid. CCC 1628 For this reason (or for other reasons that render the marriage null and void) the Church, after an examination of the situation by the competent ecclesiastical tribunal, can declare the nullity of a marriage, i.e., that the marriage never existed. In this case the contracting parties are free to marry, provided the natural obligations of a previous union are discharged. CCC 1629  CONTRACT MARRIAGE COVENANT MARRIAGE Terms based upon the compliance of the other Terms based upon a promise given to comply. person. Example: I will love you if you love me. I Example: I will love you. I will be faithful. will be faithful if you will be faithful. Failure to comply releases the other party from Your failure to comply does not change my the agreement. Example: Since you don't love me, promise to comply. Example: Even though you I don't love you. Since you haven't been faithful to don't love me, I still love you. Even if you're not me, I don't have to be faithful to you. faithful, I will remain faithful. Contract marriage is over when promises are A covenant marriage is over when the one completed or broken. Example: Since you did not making the promise dies. Example: The duration fulfill your end of the deal, our contract is broken. of our covenant is "until death". You are released from your contract. Contract marriage maintains separate All belongings are held in common by both belongings. Example: This is my car, this is money. covenant partners. Example: This is our money, He is your son. my step-son is now our son. Witnessed by the state. Example: getting married Witnessed by God. Example: getting married in a in front of a justice of the peace. Church before God and the community Is an exchange of goods and services. Example: I Is an exchange of people. Example: I am yours will mow the grass and you will do the cooking. and you are mine. Typically ratified by a signature. Example: I Typically ratified through “cutting a covenant.” signed a contract with CapitalOne to pay off my In ancient times, those entering into an agreement car loan. with each other would slay an animal and cut the parts of it in half. They would lay the halves along a path, then walk in the midst of the path to cement the agreement. This was symbolic of the fact that the success of the covenant was contingent upon each performing his part of the bargain. Examples: Examples: 1. prostitution vs. marriage 2. indentured servitude vs. kinship 3. babysitting vs. parenting