Christian Living Education 12: Marriage and Family Handbook PDF

CHRISTIAN LIVING EDUCATION 12: MARRIAGE AND FAMILY HANDOUT NO. 3 LOVE AND SEXUALITY OVERVIEW Introduction A. Imago Dei: Made to Love B. The Gift of Sexual Difference C. Marri...

CHRISTIAN LIVING EDUCATION 12: MARRIAGE AND FAMILY HANDOUT NO. 3 LOVE AND SEXUALITY OVERVIEW Introduction A. Imago Dei: Made to Love B. The Gift of Sexual Difference C. Marriage and Sexuality D. Enriching Love and Sexuality through Chastity INTRODUCTION This handout will explore on one of the most profound and intricate aspects of human existence: our understanding of love, relationships, and sexuality from the perspective of Catholic teachings. As we delve into this topic, we will uncover the Church's rich history, its moral teachings, and the profound role it plays in shaping the lives and relationships of its followers. By the end of this lesson, we hope to gain a deeper appreciation for the Catholic Church's perspective on love and sexuality, and its impact on individuals and society at large. Let's embark on this exploration with open minds and hearts. A. Imago Dei: Made to Love “Then God said: Let us make human beings in our image, after our likeness…Male and female he created them.” (Gn 1:26-27) "God created man and woman in his own image, in the image of God he created him, male and female he created them. “Man and woman occupy a unique place in creation: they are "in the image of God"; in their own nature they unite the spiritual and material worlds; they are created "male and female"; God established them in his friendship (CCC 355). In the Book of Genesis, we read that man and woman are the unique crown of God's creation, made in God's image. In his image, men and women have received the capacity to be in relationship with God and with each other. "The mystery of the Christian family can be fully understood only in the light of the Father's infinite love revealed in Christ, who gave himself up for our sake and who continues to dwell in our midst" (Amoris Laetitia, 59). We are made for relationship, for communion, and called to love like God with faithfulness, trustfulness, responsibility, forgiveness, mercy, and generosity. Since God is love, then we are all capable of emanating this love in our very lives by engaging into relationships. As the image of God, man and woman are created for love. This truth was fully revealed to us in the New Testament, together with the mystery of the inner life of the Trinity: "God is love (1 John 4: 8) and in himself he lives a mystery of personal loving communion. Creating the human race in his own image... God inscribed in the humanity of man and woman the vocation, and thus the capacity and responsibility, of love and communion. Love is therefore the fundamental and innate vocation of 1 every human being". The whole meaning of true freedom, and self-control which follows from it, is thus directed towards self-giving in communion and friendship with God and with others. People can have different kinds of love, and some are more special than others. One type of love is all about using people to fulfill your own desires, like when you only care about someone because they can give you something you want. But there's a better kind of love that's more like friendship. It's when you really care about someone for who they are, not just what they can do for you. It's like the way God loves us, with a lot of generosity. In this kind of love, you want what's best for the other person because you see them as someone deserving of love. It's a love that brings people together because they both care about each other's happiness. When you love someone like this, it's a special gift to them, and it helps you understand the importance of both loving and being loved in return. B. The Gift of Sexual Difference Male and female is the twofold expression of human nature. Like human life itself, sexual difference is not arbitrary but is willed by God. Men and women are equal in dignity and yet are different from one another in important ways, including in their bodies and how they relate to each other and to the world. Sexuality affects every aspect of who we are. Man and woman are called to love and to self-giving in the unity of body and spirit. Femininity and masculinity are complementary gifts, through which human sexuality is an integrating part of the concrete capacity for love which God has inscribed in man and woman. "Sexuality is a fundamental component of personality, one of its modes of being, of manifestation, of communicating with others, of feeling, of expressing and of living human love". Human sexuality is thus a good, part of that created gift which God saw as being "very good", when he created the human person in his image and likeness, and "male and female he created them" (Genesis 1:27). Insofar as it is a way of relating and being open to others, sexuality has love as its intrinsic end, more precisely, love as donation and acceptance, love as giving and receiving. This points to the "spousal meaning" of the body, whereby the human body is seen to be a gift. St. John Paul II explains this as man and woman existing not merely "'side by side' or 'together,' but [also as] called to exist mutually 'one for the other'. The relationship between a man and a woman is all about love. When love is at the center, it makes the physical aspect of a relationship truly human and special. In a loving marriage, when two people come together, they express their love for each other through their bodies, showing that they complete and give themselves fully to each other. This kind of married love is like a superpower that helps people grow and plays a role in making the world a better place filled with love. But when love is missing from the picture and the physical part of a relationship becomes just about pleasure and not love, things can go wrong. It can lead to a world where people treat each other like objects instead of human beings. In this kind of world, women might be seen as things for men to use, and children might be seen as burdens for parents. We don't want that kind of world. We want a world where love is the most important thing, and people are treated with respect and kindness. Human sexuality is woven into the fabric of each man and woman. It carries within it the powers of love and life and is the human source of our most basic relationships as members of a family. Human sexuality indicates the capacity of persons to love one another and be united with others in friendship and community. Sexual difference is a sign of our call to love, to communion, inscribed 2 within who we are, including our very bodies. As Pope Francis notes, "It needs to be emphasized that 'biological sex and the socio-cultural role of sex can be distinguished but not separated.'" C. Marriage and Sexuality God is love. He is the Blessed Trinity, a Communion of three Divine Persons—Father, Son, and Holy Spirit—continuously giving and receiving love, one to the other. God calls all people to communion with Him and with each other through the Church, the Body of Christ. We live out this call to communion in various ways whether as clergy, consecrated religious, married persons, or in the single state—in families, friendships, in the parish, in a religious community, with colleagues at work, among fellow citizens, and indeed with the global community. A unique form of communion to which most people are called is found in marriage, the one-flesh communion of persons between husband and wife. "Marriage is the icon of God's love for us" (Amoris Laetitia, 121). God desires that each of us grow in holiness by giving and receiving love like him. Such love requires putting the human ego aside and first considering the needs of others before our own. As we pray in the Peace Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi, "it is in giving that we receive." We can only know our real selves when we give of ourselves to others. Regarding human sexuality, the mutuality noted above comes into play as men and women seek to love each other. Each has different gifts to present to the other. Whether it is in friendship or marriage, forming authentic relationships with other people may be the most profound way that we enact our likeness to God. Of all the "communions of persons" that people can create; Scripture tells us that marriage is the fundamentally unique relationship. “Marriage is an 'affective union,' spiritual and sacrificial, which combines the warmth of friendship and erotic passion, and endures long after emotions and passion subside" (Amoris Laetitia, 120). God willed that marriage be the unique communion of persons, indeed, a covenantal relationship, that is designed for the well-being of husband and wife (the "one- flesh" union) and the "begetting and educating of children." D. Enriching Love and Sexuality through Chastity As the Catechism of the Catholic Church says, sexuality "becomes personal and truly human when it is integrated into the relationship of one person to another, in the complete and mutual lifelong gift of a man and a woman". Insofar as it entails sincere self-giving, it is obvious that growth in love is helped by that discipline of the feelings, passions and emotions which leads us to self-mastery. One cannot give what one does not possess. If the person is not master of self — through the virtues and, in a concrete way, through chastity — he or she lacks that self-possession which makes self-giving possible. Chastity is self-giving. Chastity is the spiritual power which frees love from selfishness and aggression. To the degree that a person weakens chastity, his or her love becomes more and more selfish, that is, satisfying a desire for pleasure and no longer self-giving. The gift of human sexuality is precious with its powers of life and love, and it calls for authentic and healthy integration in the person. This is the virtue of chastity. Chastity ensures "the successful integration of sexuality within the person" (CCC, 2337). It protects the inner unity (body, mind, and soul) of the person. It enables men and women to defend "love from the perils of selfishness and aggressiveness" (Familiaris Consortio, 33). Everyone is called to chastity. Chastity is necessary to the right living of one's sexuality. It requires practice, or as the Catechism calls it, an "apprenticeship in self-mastery," where a person learns the meaning of true freedom. 3 With chastity, we can avoid using others and abusing ourselves. We can live our sexuality according to God's plan for our lives. Chastity reminds us of the value of the person and of the body. It helps us respect interpersonal boundaries as well as our own bodies. Chastity enables us to "love rightly" according to our state in life. "The chaste person maintains the integrity of the powers of life and love placed in him. This integrity ensures the unity of the person, it is opposed to any behavior that would impair it" (CCC, 2338). Sources: Amoris Laetitia, Pope Francis, 2016 Catechism of the Catholic Church Familiaris Consortio, John Paul II, 1981 Laudato Si, Pope Francis, 2015 The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality, Cardinal Lopez Trujillo, Vatican City, 1995 https://www.usccb.org/topics/natural-family-planning/love-and-sexuality#Madeanchor 4