Adulthood.pdf

Adulthood Stages of adulthood Early adulthood 25-45 Middle adulthood 45-65 Late adulthood 65 and up Early adulthood 25-45 For many people, this is a very productive period of life. For many people, this is when we get into long term relationships, start jobs, and have families. Love We will start ge...

Adulthood Stages of adulthood Early adulthood 25-45 Middle adulthood 45-65 Late adulthood 65 and up Early adulthood 25-45 For many people, this is a very productive period of life. For many people, this is when we get into long term relationships, start jobs, and have families. Love We will start generally (Sternberg) with what romantic love looks like, get narrower (Gottman) what healthy romantic relationships have and finally revisit attachment theory (Johnson) Romantic relationships Early adulthood is often when we find long term relationships and in Canada this typically means marriage. Although this has changed a bit, for the first time since we have kept track of these things, Stats Canada says we now are in a place were 49% (less than half) of adults are not married (they may be single, separated, divorced, or widowed). Like everything in this course where there is individual variation, find what works for you. Having said that, married people tend to live long, report less stress, have less health problems, even weigh less than single people. Emotionally, married people tend to rate themselves happier than common law individuals. Perhaps not surprisingly, the life long single group was a close second, happier than the divorced, separated, and widowed (Marks, 1996). Robert Sternberg (1949- present) Sternberg’s Triangular theory of love Triangular theory of love Intimacy alone: close friendship Passion alone: infatuation Commitment alone: empty love Passion + intimacy: romantic love: intense joyful. What people mean when they talk of falling in love. May not last. Triangular Theory of love Companionate love = intimacy & commitment (but not passion) Maybe long term marriages where the passion has slowly ebbed, but they are still best friends and still committed to be with the person through thick and thin. Triangular theory of love Commitment + passion = Fatuous (foolish, conflictual) love. (Whirlwind relationships) Passion + intimacy + commitment = ideal love or consummate love. Of course, attaining consummate love may be easier than keeping it. John Gottman: Whereas Sternberg is focused more on what romantic relationships involve, Gottman is more focused on what keeps romantic relationships healthy. Sue Johnson, emotionally focused couples counselling: Sue Johnson focused on “turning towards” and in particular the attachment bond in couples. Romantic Relationships: are monogamy and commitment of value? People who in general rate themselves happiest have had one sexual partner in the past year: happier than people who have had none, but also happier than the ones who have had 80. Having said that I would never force an asexual person into a relationship because of that norm. Similarly, if you are ecstatically happy having recreational sex, I wouldn’t encourage you to stop. LGBTQ Relationships They are not that different from straight relationships. “Same-sex and different-sex couples are similar in many ways. They fall in love, worry about the long-term outcome of their relationships….Regardless of couple type, the one who makes the most money usually does the least around the house” (Bjorklund, p.184 Sex in various couples In the early years of a relationship, the amount of sex a couple has generally depends on how many males are in the relationship. Gay men have the most, followed by heterosexual couples, followed by lesbian couples. After 10 years or so, the frequency of sex declines for everyone, but the heterosexual partners have sex more often than the same-sex partners (Bonello & Cross, 2010) Divorce Falling out of love: divorce is more frequent now. In 2008, 40.7% of marriages were projected to end in divorce before the 30th wedding anniversary (Statistics Canada, 2011), although about three quarters of people who divorce will remarry. Us Canadians love to compare ourselves to Americans, especially when it is to our advantage. Americans get divorces at a higher rate than Canadians (50% of marriages end in divorce). What us? Parents? Robert LeVine Robert LeVine did psychological anthropology. So often we know the psychology of North America, but Dr. LeVine studied parenting and child development of people across the globe. In fact, in 1994 he published Childcare and Culture: Lessons from Africa. 23 Robert A. Levine LeVine argues that families in every society have the same three basic goals for their children: survival, teaching skills and attitudes, and encouraging other social values. He sees these as hierarchical. 24 Diana Baumrind 25 Parenting Dimensions 26 Authoritative parents Adolescents from authoritative families consistently show the most favourable out-comes. They do better in school, they are more independent and self-assured, they are less anxious and depressed, and they are less likely to get involved in delinquency and drug use. 27 Authoritarian families Adolescents from authoritarian families are more dependent and passive. They are less self-assured and have weak self-esteem and communication skills. 28 Indulgent families Adolescents from indulgent families tend to be more immature and irresponsible. They are also more influenced by their friends and peers. 29 Indifferent families Adolescents from indifferent families have the hardest time. They show little interest in school or work and are more likely to get involved in delinquency, early sexual activity, and drug use. 30 Canada is more permissive “There are cultural differences in parenting styles. In a study comparing parenting styles in Canada, France, and Italy, Michael Claes and colleagues at the University of Montreal found Canadian parents to be the most tolerant, having fewer rules and disciplinary actions. Canadian mothers and fathers were seen as less punitive, less coercive, and more tolerant than French and Italian mothers. The French were found to parent in a moderate style. French fathers, however, were perceived by teens as emotionally distant, rigid, and prone to intergenerational conflict. French mothers, for their part, were reported to foster closer bonds as their children grew into adolescence (Claes et al., 2011)” (Textbook, p. 789). Our children also determine how we parent Despite the fact that different parenting styles are differentially effective overall, every child is different and parents must be adaptable. Some children have particularly difficult temperaments, and these children require more parenting. Because these difficult children demand more parenting, the behaviours of the parents matter more for the children’s development than they do for other, less demanding children who require less parenting overall (Pluess & Belsky, 2010)” (Textbook, p. 790). Parenting takes A LOT of your time, but don’t forget yourself or your relationship Although the focus is on the child, the parents must never forget about each other. Parenting is time-consuming and emotionally taxing, and the parents must work together to create a relationship in which both mother and father contribute to the household tasks and support each other. It is also important for the parents to invest time in their own intimacy, as happy parents are more likely to stay together, and divorce has a profoundly negative impact on children, particularly during and immediately after the divorce (Burt, Barnes, McGue, & Iacono, 2008; Ge, Natsuaki, & Conger, 2006). social clock The culturally preferred “right time” for major life events, such as moving out of the childhood house, getting married, and having children. It is hard to over emphasis how much this is a social construct. In some European and Hispanic cultures you wouldn’t dream of leaving your childhood house before you were getting married (and sometimes not even then), in Canada we often move out in emerging adulthood. In those same cultures, you may have your children very early, but we wait until about 29. Middle adulthood 45-65 Middle adulthood 45-65: the empty nest Empty nesting. With the birth of the first child now being around 29, in middle adulthood your children are moving out. But in North America, there is a change with parents having more contact with their adult children than previous generations. Karen Fingerman et al (2009, 2011) found that middle aged parents give emotional support to their adult children an average of once a week, advice an average of once a month, and financial/material support several times a year. “And if you wonder what the result is of this attention, their adult children show better adjustment and well-being than earlier cohorts” (Bjorklund, p. 188). Late Adulthood 60 and beyond In modern western countries most older adults maintain an active lifestyle, remain as happy as they were when younger — or are happier — and increasingly value their social connections with family and friends. However, as they get older there will again be an increase in chronic conditions and sensory and cognitive slowing. Late Adulthood Do we see our past with rose coloured glasses? Ya, a lot of us do. “Kennedy, Mather, and Carstensen (2004) found that people’s memories of their lives became more positive with age, and Myers and Diener (1996) found that older adults tended to speak more positively about events in their lives, particularly their relationships with friends and family, than did younger adults” (Textbook P.795). Your textbook has one group (65 and up) as late adulthood. With life expectancy going up, many writers have split this into two: Older adulthood 65-74 and Late adulthood 75 and older. In fact, the 75 and older group is the fastest growing segment of the population. Why split this group in two? The rate of physical decline from 65 to 74 is no faster than 45 to 64. This group tends to be relatively healthy although the steady decline in hearing and eyesight means more hearing aids and reading glasses. We are losing some muscle mass. Nonetheless most of this group are independent in every sense of the terms. What is different is role changes that accompanies retirement. For most, this is a positive change. In fact for those who choose to retire (but not those forced to retire, esp. because of ill health) “every indication is that mental health is as good-or perhaps better-in this age group than at younger ages”( Bjorklund, p. 365). Retirement The major change of life for many older adults is retirement. For some people, retirement is a very enjoyable time of life, for others it is filled with regret and anxiety. How do you retire well. Wang (2007) longitudinal study indicated that there are 7 things that help retirement be successful. 1. Continue to work part-time past retirement in order to ease into retirement status slowly. 2. Plan for retirement — this is a good idea financially, but also making plans to incorporate other kinds of work or hobbies into post-employment life makes sense 3. Retire with someone — if the retiree is still married, it is a good idea to retire at the same time as a spouse, so that people can continue to work part-time and follow a retirement plan together. Retirement 4. Have a happy marriage — people with marital problems tend to find retirement more stressful because they do not have a positive home life to return to and can no longer seek refuge in long working hours. Couples that work on their marriages can make their retirements a lot easier. 5. Take care of physical and financial health — a sound financial plan and good physical health can ensure a healthy, peaceful retirement. 6. Retire early from a stressful job — people who stay in stressful jobs for fear that they will lose their pensions or won’t be able to find work somewhere else feel trapped. Toxic environments can take a severe emotional toll on an employee. Leaving an unsatisfying job early may make retirement a relief. 7. Retire “on time” — retiring too early or too late can cause people to feel “out of sync” or to feel they have not achieved their goals. Late adulthood 75 and older Late adulthood (age 75 and older) This group unfortunately “the processes of physical and mental aging begin to accelerate.” “We have generally shown that reliably replicable average age decrements in psychometric abilities do not occur prior to age 60, but that such reliable decrement can be found for all abilities by 74 years of age” Schaie & Willies, 2010 Seattle Longitudinal Study (SLS) of adult cognition. Cognition Older adults do have slower processing speed, word finding and attention may go down (was that a squirrel?). Conversely, older adults have huge funds of knowledge. One way to think of intelligence is fluid intelligence and crystalized intelligence. Fluid intelligence is problem solving and it peaks very early in life in the 20s. That is why academic fields that rely a lot on problem solving like pure mathematics often academics have their best work very early. Conversely, there is how much you know about the world, your fund of knowledge, that is crystalized intelligence. It is the reason some people write their best novels when they are sixty. Crystalized intelligence Your textbook makes this very nice comment about crystalized intelligence and aging: “It is this superior knowledge combined with a slower and more complete processing style, along with a more sophisticated understanding of the workings of the world around them, that gives the elderly the advantage of wisdom over the advantages of fluid intelligence — the ability to think and acquire information quickly and abstractly — which favour the young (Baltes, Staudinger, & Lindenberger, 1999; Scheibe, Kunzmann, & Baltes, 2009)” (Textbook, p. 796). That doesn’t mean some older people don’t have serious cognitive problems. One thing we don’t see much of before 65, and then the rates sky rockets is dementia. “The likelihood of developing Alzheimer’s doubles about every five years after age 65. After age 85, the risk reaches nearly 8% per year (Hebert et al., 1995). Different types of dementia Dementia is the loss of cognitive functioning — thinking, remembering, and reasoning — to such an extent that it interferes with a person's daily life and activities Although there are many types of dementia, the two most common are Alzheimer’s and vascular. Alzheimer’s By far, the most common dementia (60-80% of all dementia clients) With Alzheimer’s dementia people gradually struggle with memory and disorientation (getting lost in familiar places) and reasoning as plaques and tangles cause damage to the neurons in the brain. What causes Alzheimer`s? Protein Alzheimer's disease is thought to be caused by the abnormal build-up of proteins in and around brain cells. One of the proteins involved is called amyloid, deposits of which form plaques around brain cells. The other protein is called tau, deposits of which form tangles within brain cells. People are asymptomatic for a long time This build up in proteins starts long before people have noticeable cognitive problems. Presently a PET scan can detect this protein build up which is expensive and there are waiting list, but recently a blood test has been developed which means we may be able to a better job at early detection. Vascular dementias The second most common dementia is vascular dementias where damage to blood vessels cause damage to the brain (e.g., from strokes) unlike Alzheimer’s vascular dementias can be step-wise. After a small stroke, you may lose some functioning, and then improve a bit and stay at the level for a long time (esp. now that we give blood thinners to reduce reoccurrence) until the next vascular event. With vascular dementia problem solving and speed of processing can be affected more than memory. Heredity is a causal factor in dementia, but so is lifestyle: keep active, and engage in mentally challenging activities. Older adults who continue to keep their minds active by engaging in cognitive activities, such as reading, playing musical instruments, attending lectures, or doing crossword puzzles, who maintain social interactions with others, and who keep themselves physically fit have a greater chance of maintaining their mental acuity than those who do not (Cherkas et al., 2008; Verghese et al., 2003). In short, although physical illnesses may occur to anyone, the more people keep their brains active and the more they maintain a healthy and active lifestyle, the more healthy their brains will remain (Ertel, Glymour, & Berkman, 2008). Early signs of dementia: 1. memory loss Early signs of dementia are tricky, especially in the oldest family members, because there are age related memory problems that are typical, so when your loved one forgets things you wonder is this normal aging or something more serious. What might you see? Your family member losing things more often (sometimes with irritability if they accuse you of moving things that you didn’t). 2. Planning problems Following a recipe or the following driving directions may become more difficult. This may be noticeable if it is with a familiar task, if you find yourself saying “grandma, you have used email to contact us for years now. What do you mean you can’t get it to work?” 3. Disorientation Not being sure about time or place. Showing up late or early because they had the time wrong. Getting turned around in a familiar place. Social withdrawal Not be interested in going out, or not listening when others are talking. Personality changes People may get more irritable, withdrawn are just not seem themselves. Treatment There is no cure for Alzheimer’s but there are medications that can slow the progression (cholinesterase inhibitors and glutamine inhibitors that help with neurotransmissions). Sometimes this is combined with medications for anxiety or to help with sleep. Lifetyle changes (better exercise, diet, and cognitive stimulation) and sometimes occupational therapy to help adapt (make more lists, use more reminders, etc.). Help is out there For family members as well as clients the Alzheimer’s Society is a good resource (1405 Faulkner Cres, Saskatoon, SK S7L 3R5 Phone: (306) 683-6322). Aging well: lots of it is attitude Levy, Slade, Kunkel, and Kasl (2002) found that the elderly who had more positive perceptions about aging also lived longer. You may know the lady below. The oldest female bodybuilder at 80 years of age: Ernestine Shepard (I think in this picture she was “only” 74). Aging well People who believe that the elderly are sick, vulnerable, and grumpy often act according to such beliefs (Nemmers, 2005), Similarly, cognitive losses are not as universal as first believed. Here is one of my heroes Diana Baumrind, creator of authoritative parenting. She was still researching when she was 91 (she was killed in a car accident or she might still be working). Bereavement and Death On Death and Dying (1997), Elisabeth Kübler-Ross describes five phases of grief through which people pass in grappling with the knowledge that they or someone close to them is dying: 1. Denial: “I feel fine.” “This can’t be happening; not to me.” 2. Anger: “Why me? It’s not fair!” “How can this happen to me?” “Who is to blame?” 3. Bargaining: “Just let me live to see my children graduate.” “I’d do anything for a few more years.” “I’d give my life savings if…” 4. Depression: “I’m so sad, why bother with anything?” “I’m going to die. What’s the point?” “I miss my loved ones — why go on?” 5. Acceptance: “I know my time has come; it’s almost my time.”