Chapter 5: Ways to Involve Families PDF

Summary

This chapter discusses strategies for involving families in early learning experiences, highlighting the importance of creating a welcoming and engaging environment for all family members, including fathers. It also emphasizes the need for flexible work arrangements and support for fathers’ involvement. The chapter explores innovative ways to encourage this participation, including technology use and improved communication.

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5 Chapter WAYS TO INVOLVE FAMILIES oliveromg/Shutte...

5 Chapter WAYS TO INVOLVE FAMILIES oliveromg/Shutterstock.com “It’s not only children who grow. Parents do too. As much as we watch to see what our children do with their lives, they are watching us to see what we do with ours. I can’t tell my children to reach for the sun. All I can do is reach for it, myself.” —Joyce Maynard LEARNING OUTCOMES After studying this chapter, you will be able to 1. identify and evaluate various strategies for 5. review how to plan and evaluate a fundraising involving families in centre experiences project 2. review approaches to creating male-friendly 6. describe strategies for planning celebrations environments with families 3. compare strategies for developing effective 7. describe the roles and responsibilities of family formal and informal family gatherings members who serve on the board of directors 4. discuss policies for recruiting, training, and 8. discuss ways to involve families in the evaluation evaluating volunteers of the staff and the early learning environment. NEL 159 Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. STRATEGIES FOR INVOLVING relationships with their fathers were often distant as their fathers were absorbed in work and interests FAMILIES outside the family, or weren’t present at all. Unlike An alliance with families begins when the family first mothers who learned from their own mothers, many visits the centre. By the time they actually enrol their men are on their own in figuring out the best way to child in the centre, family members should be aware parent and the new ways of parenting! of the opportunities for them to become significant Today men are more likely to be involved in child partners in the program. Centres should create a wel- care, providing emotional support and guidance, and coming atmosphere by crafting an environment that is playing a more active role in their community through aesthetically pleasing and inviting, and by hiring staff their children’s child-care centres, schools, and extra- who are genuinely committed to engage with families. curricular activities while at the same time assuming Early learning environments should also find innova- more household duties. Men are also more involved in tive ways to maximize the input of busy parents while decisions related to family planning and are now more at the same time setting realistic goals with regard to likely to be present at the birth of their child. what can be expected from both educators and family In support of families there is a need for flex- members. These goals need to be re-evaluated on an ible work arrangements, greater access to joint cus- ongoing basis to determine their relevance to all parties. tody, and high-school education that gives young men the skills required to be supportive and nur- turing fathers. At the college and university level, MALE-FRIENDLY ENVIRONMENTS programs in child care, social work, and nursing “The growing interest in the role of men in the family should encourage greater male participation. The has been triggered by diverse demographic, socio- media also play a role in shaping social attitudes and economic and cultural transformations that have redefining the role of fathers across all cultures. occurred over the past several decades, impacting the Fathers and other significant males in children’s formation, stability and overall well-being of fami- lives—whether grandfathers, uncles, mothers’ boy- lies” (United Nations, 2011). The role of fathers and friends, or stepfathers—need to be included in the significant males in a child’s life has changed dramat- family–centre partnership. But these significant ically within one generation, which is of increasing males face many stereotypes. Some people see fathers interest to researchers studying how father involve- as either invisible or incompetent second-class par- ment can enhance the well-being and health of their ents. Many programs for families have traditionally children and families. As women enter the work- served women and children and have excluded the force in increasing numbers, it is clear that men are active involvement of men, sometimes because the more actively engaged in family responsibilities. fathers did not want to participate, and at other times In the past, men have been seen as providers, pro- because mothers did not want fathers to be involved. tectors, and disciplinarians. For many men, these new Many think that mothers are better suited to be responsibilities vary greatly from the roles their own the primary and more influential parent. There is fathers played in their lives; they are in uncharted ter- also a communication challenge: while mothers may ritory. They have few role models to draw from; their talk about mothering on a regular basis with each INSIDE LOOK The U.K.’s Fatherhood Institute is a nonprofit organization whose mandate is to improve the well-being of children by encouraging involved and responsible fathering. In 2016 the Institute issued its Fairness in Families Index, which measures how mothers and fathers in 22 countries share child-care responsibilities. Rankings were based on issues such as parental leave, the wage gap between mothers and fathers, and the sharing of housework. Canada ranked seventh, up significantly from 2010 when it ranked twelfth. More detailed information about their research can be found at www.fatherhoodinstitute.org/research. 160 CHAPTER 5 NEL Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. other, fathers are more likely to talk about other a collective responsibility to support and promote topics, and so have less opportunity for an exchange positive father involvement. The degree to which of information about their fathering role. we contribute collectively to this goal is a reflection Special occasions and school events are frequently of our commitment to being a truly caring society. missed by fathers who are unable to take time off The physical environment of the child and family from work, are live-away fathers, are engaged in centre should reflect a welcoming environment for active military service, or are incarcerated. In early fathers; photographs from magazines or posters that learning environments, we can use technology to show fathers in nurturing roles will send positive support father engagement: video recordings of con- messages. The early learning environment must certs, band performances, sports events, and just a give them opportunities to interact with their child, “day in the life” of their child at the centre can be and encourage them to participate in staff planning copied inexpensively to DVDs or emailed to fathers. and programming. Perhaps if there were more male Fathers who have only supervised access to their teachers in early childhood programs, we would see children may also appreciate these types of connec- greater father involvement! It is also important that tions if the court allows. we don’t assume that what we know about the dif- Many men are looking to take positive action in ferences in male and female experiences are uni- the community, and bringing fathers together allows versal; each culture and each family varies in the men to talk among themselves and devise ways to roles of males and females. contribute to the early childhood program. When The focus on having fathers actively involved men have the opportunity to connect with each in the centre is not meant to minimize the role of other, they reduce their isolation and find an oppor- mothers or other family members but to develop tunity for mentoring relationships to develop. They effective strategies for all those who are actively may also discover the foundation of a lifelong friend- involved in the child’s life. ship that begins in an early learning environment. Early learning environments may also want The involvement of fathers or significant males to consider involving other male members of the in the raising of our children is an issue that affects community who may willing to volunteer in the all of us. Our own unique personal experiences with centre, including male high-school students who our fathers often have a lifelong impact. Our society need to complete community hours, further edu- is the mirror of the quality of relationships between cating them about possible career opportunities. parents and their children. It takes a village to raise Is there a seniors’ residence near the site? Is there a child, and it takes a village to support fathers in a Big Brothers agency in your community? Some bringing out the best in their children. Society has large corporations also allow workers time to pro- vide support to the community. Obviously, everyone who volunteers in the centre must have appropriate criminal reference checks. Scotia Plaza Child Care Centre oliveromg/Shutterstock.com This father and son enjoy time together at the child- This father enjoys early morning fun in the dramatic care centre. play centre. NEL WAYS TO INVOLVE FAMILIES 161 Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. INSIDE LOOK More Than a Haircut (MTAH), which started in 2006 as a one-day project by the Macaulay Child Devel- opment Centre and the United Way, has now morphed into a meaningful and expanded version of a safe and comfortable space for fathers to talk about parenting their children—a barbershop! In an effort to engage fathers, particularly in Toronto’s Caribbean community, this space provides opportunities to meet and engage in conversations led by fathers on relevant topics, including the importance of fathers as role models, strategies for building bonds between themselves and their children, engaging in early literacy, supporting their children in their school environment, and exploring their experiences of systemic racism. Recently developed is a series that explores these issues in more detail. A 30-minute DVD on MTAH is available at http://www.macaulaycentre.org/about/publications/. Find them on Facebook at www.facebook.com/MoreThanAHaircut. INSIDE LOOK While I was a bit reluctant to attend my first father–child event at the centre, they have now become some- thing I really look forward to. I’m not always able to be there at drop off and pick up; my wife and I are separated. This was an incredible opportunity for Kennedy and me to spend quality time in a place where she is happy and engaged. The staff at the centre organized a series of events every Saturday morning for two hours over a period of six months—one each month. There were different topics and Kennedy and I enjoyed every one but the best was Cooking Day—we made pasta and sauce from scratch and the staff at the end of the morning had cookbooks written for children available for us to borrow so we could continue our “chefing” at home. This was not just a great time for Kennedy and me, I also got to meet other fathers, and several of us have become quite good friends, and we have the children over for play dates. Most of all, I now feel that I have a closer relationship with the staff. A lot of time and effort went into planning these events, and I know that many of them have families of their own and have given up time with them to be with us. BOOKS FOR CHILDREN Handbook of Father Involvement, by N. My Dad, by A. Browne Cabrera and C. Tamis-LeMonda My Dad Is a Superman, by Auntie Ant Baby Management for Men: A Very Practical David’s Father, by R. Munsch Guide, by H. Hanssen Dad Goes to School, by M. McNamara and M. Gordon Father for Life: A Journey of Joy, Challenge and Just Me and My Dad, by M. Mayer Change, by A.A. Brott My Dad Is Awesome, by N. Butterworth My Daddy and Me, by T. Macnaughton Fathering Right from the Start: Straight Talk about Pregnancy, Birth and Beyond, by Daddies Do It Different, by A. Sitomer J. Heinowitz and W.F. Horn Fathering Your Child from the Crib to the Class- BOOKS FOR ADULTS room: A Dad’s Guide to Years 2–9, by A. Brott Crawling: A Father’s First Year, by E. Cooper Father’s First Steps: 25 Things Every New Engaging Fathers in the Early Years: A Practitio- Father Should Know, by R. Sears ner’s Guide, by C. Potter and R. Olley 162 CHAPTER 5 NEL Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. Fathering Your Toddler: A Dad’s Guide to the FAMILY–CENTRE Second and Third Years, by B. Vallejo GET-TOGETHERS The Importance of Engaged Fathering Get-togethers can be held for a variety of purposes. ­(E-Parenting Series), by J. Sclafani Family members may wish to discuss a particular issue as outlined in the bylaws, to share general information, or simply to enjoy one another’s company. Families may be surveyed formally and informally to find out what types of gatherings they would like to participate in and what topics are of interest. Families are always more likely to attend these events if they are involved from the beginning in their organization. FAMILY GATHERINGS: FORMAL NadyaEugene/Shutterstock.com SESSIONS TO SUPPORT PARENTING SKILLS FACTORS THAT INFLUENCE PARENTING Factors that influence parenting including parents’ knowledge of child development, their personal For little people, the world is a fascinating place— beliefs and expectations, their own experiences, and fun with dad! their socioeconomic environment. The web of family EXHIBIT 5.1 How Effectively Are Men Involved in Your Program? The following checklist is intended to refer to not only 6. We understand that differences in male and fathers but also grandfathers, family friends, and other female experiences are universal, and we try significant males who may aid teachers in their efforts to understand how these differences will to provide inclusive male environments. Assign a value affect our relationships with the men in our of 1, 2, or 3 to each of the statements below, where program. ___ 1 means we’re doing a great job 7. We make every effort to learn how the 2 means we’re not doing badly diversity of family forms and culture may 3 means more work is needed influence the fathering role. ___ 1. The philosophy statement of the centre spe- 8. We speak directly to men rather than cifically targets the involvement of men in through their female partners. ___ the life of our centre. ___ 9. We have male staff members in our centre. 2. Our philosophy translates into action in our ___ centre. Staff are strongly committed to male 10. Staff actively encourage and expect male involvement and understand its importance. ___ participation and contact them individually, 3. Staff have identified the significant males in including live-away fathers. ___ the lives of the children in our centre. ___ 11. We make an effort to include male partici- 4. We evaluate our effectiveness regularly to pation in the centre, in both indoor and out- improve our connections with fathers. ___ door environments, by inviting them in and letting them know they are welcome. ___ 5. Staff understand that bias does exist and are aware of possible barriers to father involve- 12. Our family visits are scheduled to include ment. ___ men. ___ (continued) NEL WAYS TO INVOLVE FAMILIES 163 Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. 13. We know we are responding to male par- 21. When men are in the playroom, we use this ticipants’ needs and interests because we ask opportunity to exchange ideas about their them. We survey men and let them know child’s development. ___ we value their opinions. ___ 22. With both parents’ agreement, we communicate 14. When fathers are at the centre, we plan verbally and in writing, and encourage fathers to activities that are reflective of male social­ be involved in events at the centre, even when ization with input from the fathers them- they are not living with their children. ___ selves. ___ 23. We are flexible when we organize family– 15. We encourage the formation of groups and teacher conferences so that all members of help to organize classes on parenting or the family can attend. ___ other issues that are of interest to and are 24. Men participating in our centre are encour- relevant to men. ___ aged to recruit other men and to mentor 16. We support play-based events, such as Dads new families. ___ and Tots, and gatherings at the centre that 25. We videotape children in our program and reflect the interests of fathers and their children include significant males interacting with the at times that are convenient for them. ___ children. This DVD is distributed to new fami- 17. When men volunteer, we give them a variety lies so they know that fathers are welcome. ___ of tasks, not just maintenance and repair. ___ 26. We share with a range of local media the 18. Men participate on our board of directors initiatives, events, and other centre celebra- and work on committees. ___ tions, highlighting the positive role that men 19. Men volunteer in our program, in the play- play in our centres. ___ room, and on field trips, and take us to their 27. Posters, magazine pictures, photos of fathers, place of business. ___ and books in our program reflect men from 20. Fathers actively seek out staff to discuss a variety of racial and ethnic backgrounds in issues as they arise and engage in supportive nurturing roles, involved in child care, and communication. ___ working in nontraditional jobs. ___ INSIDE LOOK There are many helpful resources available for fathers. A few are listed below. Pamphlet Series The BC Council for Families, British Columbia’s hub for information and resources for and about fami- lies, offers the Fatherhood Pamphlet Series, with six different titles for fathers. Dads and Babies: Connecting with Your Infant Dads and Toddlers: Connecting with Your Toddler Dads and Teens: Connecting with Your Teenager Dads Away from Home: Keeping the Connection When Work Takes Dad Away Rookie Moms: Ten Things Every New Dad Should Know Brochure for Young Fathers: Teen Dads. Your Baby Needs You www.bccf.ca/search/?q=%22Fatherhood%22&submit= Websites that might engage fathers: Things Dads Do: https://thingsdadsdo.wordpress.com Canadian Dad: http://canadiandad.com Great Dad Because Dads Don’t Always Think Like Moms: www.greatdad.com Fathers’ Forum: www.fathersforum.com 164 CHAPTER 5 NEL Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. and community is the child’s anchor for early devel- remediation. It is also important to acknowledge that opment. Parenting is embedded in social and cultural many parents will have expertise and, with encour- contexts that influence parenting styles. Warm, recip- agement, may be willing to share with teachers and rocal parent–child interactions and fewer life stresses other families. A collaborative approach is always in the home facilitate children’s prosocial behaviour. more successful than a deficit approach! Families are the first and most powerful influence on Parents should also have a voice in the types of children’s early learning and development: supports and resources that they need, although Nurturing, responsive parent–child relation- there are few studies on the topic of what parents ships and parental participation in child-centred want and need in terms of support and resources. activities relate to positive learning outcomes in When asked about what they would like to see in early childhood. Nurturing relationships provide a parenting support program, many parents indi- an emotional refuge for children, fostering the cated that they had clear views about the ways in development of a healthy sense of belonging, self- which support should be offered. Parents often ask esteem, and well-being. When parents are sensitive for an informal structure where they can feel com- and responsive to children’s emotions, children are fortable to discuss issues with other parents, [with] more likely to become socially competent and show emphasis on building on existing skills, opportuni- better communication skills (Cornish, 2008: 4). ties for parents themselves to define the agenda, and recognition that each parent has his/her own unique learning style that needs to be nurtured. Parents HOW EARLY LEARNING unanimously rejected the concept of “parenting classes” as they associated them with families where ENVIRONMENTS CAN SUPPORT children have been in trouble with either the police, PARENTING the school or their neighbours. Consequently, the The relationship between an early childhood envi- term “group” was preferred since it conveyed a less stigmatizing approach. At a broader level, parents ronment and the families it serves may provide in Johnson’s et al.’s 2005 study indicated the need many opportunities for families to connect with one for universal, nonstigmatized and accessible sup- another, share their issues and concerns, and find port and suggested that support would be most support and encouragement in their parenting. But appreciated when provided in the familiar setting those of us who are parents also know that these of the school. (Corter and Arimura, 2006: 22–23)† skills do not come naturally and that most of us can use help in learning to cope with the parenting role. How do educators start? Walker et al. (2005) Very little preparation for parenthood takes place to believe that help families develop their parenting skills but we effective strategies begin by identifying the early can all learn. Yet, as Gestwicki (2010: 437) points out, learning and child care needs of families in their communities and then take this information into knowledge alone is not sufficient to develop par- account when planning the curriculum and ped- enting competence. So how do we create a conti- agogy of the program. Research informs us that nuity of learning between home and the centre? when qualified staff deliver family-centred, sus- All major efforts at parenting education deal in tainable support programs that respond to parent some way with emotions and attitudes. Feelings needs, parents’ confidence and competence is about family and parent-child dynamics run deep. enhanced and the impact on their relationships Attitudes about power, authority, reciprocity with their children supports their optimal devel- and related issues are often more influential than opment. When teachers do connect by reaching out facts. Parent education must provide a vehicle for to families, there appears to be a much stronger dealing with both facts and feelings.* predictor of family involvement in their children’s Families should be considered as being on an school progress than family background variables, equal footing with educators. There is a fine line such as race, ethnicity, social class, marital status or between providing workshops that may support mother’s work status. families in their parenting role and sending the †C. Corter and T. Arimura. 2006. Community Vitality. Literature message that parents are deficient and need this Review on Parent Support. Atkinson Centre, Institute of Child Study/ Department of Human Development and Applied Psychology, *From Gestwicki, Home, School, and Community Relations, 7E. © 2010 Ontario Institute for Studies in Education/University of Toronto. South-Western, a part of Cengage, Inc. Reproduced by permission. Prepared for Invest In Kids. June 16. pp. 22–23. Reprinted by permis- www.cengage.com/permissions. sion of the Phoenix Centre for Children and Families. NEL WAYS TO INVOLVE FAMILIES 165 Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. Sometimes the most effective learning takes place when parents talk to each other about their chal- lenges and strategies for success in smaller gath- erings rather than in large groups as the research Rawpixel.com/Shutterstock.com indicates. It is also an opportunity for families in the same room to network with each other; at times, surprising connections are made. One family was so moved in a meeting by the challenges facing a teen parent in their son’s room that they became an important resource and support for that young father. When we gather with families, we must ensure that Reading together is an opportunity to bond with each other creating life long memories! a positive climate is established and risk is elimi- nated. Different approaches such as role playing, short lectures, open discussion, debates, brain- storming and workshops allow families to learn foster their child’s communication skills; to give to use a variety of techniques. Real situations and parents specific ways to use everyday activities and analogies are used to bring theories to life and play time as opportunities to help their child learn; positive feedback is used. Problem solving and to help parents become more confident by giving analysis enable the learner to continue learning them information and support; and to provide a beyond the personal contact (Berger and Riojas- forum for early identification and referral of chil- Cortez, 2012: 149). dren who show signs of language delay as well as for children with special needs. More information When parents request such support, there are about a number of resources for children with and many programs that the centre can make avail- without language delays is available at able to assist them in their parenting, and teachers will also benefit. The involvement of teachers as www.hanen.org/Home.aspx. learners is critical to avoid the “teacher as expert” model. We must also not lose sight of the importance POSITIVE DISCIPLINE IN EVERYDAY of the community in which our centre or school PARENTING resides. We must recognize and support the con- Joan Durrant, Ph.D., developed this empowering cept that families, early childhood professionals, and approach to child discipline in 2007 for Save the healthy communities are key to quality, effective, Children Sweden. Its aim is to ensure each child’s early childhood programs. Our role is to empower right to healthy development, to be involved in his parents, our communities, and ourselves at the same or her learning, and to an environment that is free time! Several programs that strive to achieve these of violence. This approach is relevant for parents of goals are discussed in the following sections. children from birth through adolescence. Positive discipline is: THE HANEN LANGUAGE PROGRAM Non-violent The 2017 Hanen Calendar: Building Language Respectful and Literacy through Powerful Conversations Solution-focused is only one of the many resources available at Based on child development principles the Hanen Centre through which parents learn special ways help their child communicate and A book is available along with a training learn. Language is the single most important pre- manual. ECEs who are interested in delivering dictor of a child’s ability to learn. Children learn these workshops are required to take a three-day by engaging in the world around them, and their facilitator course available across Canada and parents are the most important part of that world. internationally. The aims of this resource are to help parents rec- More information is available at www ognize that they have the power and ability to.positivedisciplineeveryday.com/index.php. 166 CHAPTER 5 NEL Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. MINDMASTERS behaviour while encouraging, according to the book’s The MindMasters program, developed for children back cover, an active role in guiding social-emotional between 4 and 12 years, and Mini MindMasters, for development. Developed from Sarah Landy’s highly children under 6, are a series of bilingual resources regarded book, Pathways to Competence, this manual that help children manage their emotions through and CD set shows how to set up, lead, and evaluate a fun activities. Parents, caregivers, and teachers parenting program for parents of children from birth can use the resources to help children build skills to age 7…. Field tested for 10 years with hundreds in positive thinking, stress control, relaxation, and of parents, this program has proved highly successful mindfulness. Dr. Terry Orlick, a professor at the in improving child behaviour and enhancing par- University of Ottawa, is the originator of this pro- enting skills…. Materials can be used for a 10-, 15-, or gram, and has written extensively on this topic. 20-week parenting group, and professionals can tailor MindMasters teaches simple, concrete ways to help the program to suit their needs. The program is appro- children manage stress and frustration, relax, and priate for a wide range of audiences, including parents develop a positive view on life. The materials, which of children with behaviour challenges, mothers with can be downloaded for free, include a guidebook, depression, and teen parents. Visit activities, worksheets, and online training videos. www.amazon.ca/Pathways-Competence- www.cyhneo.ca/mindmasters Young-Children-Parenting/dp/1557668620. www.cyhneo.ca/mini-mindmasters SYSTEMATIC TRAINING FOR EFFECTIVE PARENTING (STEP) CANADIAN PARENTING WORKSHOPS: A program developed by Don Dinkmeyer, Gary PREPARING CHILDREN FOR SCHOOL D. McKay, and Joyce McKay more than 20 years SUCCESS ago, Systematic Training for Effective Parenting Developed, field-tested, and evaluated by Ryerson (STEP) discusses how to improve relationships and University’s School of Early Childhood, the Canadian establish a democratic atmosphere in the home. Parenting Workshops are a set of 10 research-based The kit contains DVDs, a comprehensive leader’s workshops. These workshops have been created spe- resource guide, and a parent’s handbook, which cifically for parents with young children. They includes material about single parents, stepfami- include topics of particular interest to parents lies, schoolwork, homework, drugs, violence, and of preschoolers and elementary aged children, gangs. Kits are available for early childhood and including teaching and learning activities that teenaged children. A STEP kit is also available in empower parents; ten workshop modules, fully Spanish. See scripted and ready for use by experienced or novice www.steppublishers.com. facilitators; a facilitator’s guide; and learning eval- uation instruments (Ryerson ­University, n.d.). The workshops have been written by Judith Ber- PARENT EFFECTIVENESS TRAINING nhard, Marlinda Freire, and Vicki Mulligan, and Parent Effectiveness Training (PET) is based on published by Chestnut Publishing Group. Further the work of Thomas Gordon, a licensed psycholo- information is available at gist who began the program 50 years ago as the first national parent-training system in the United www.ryerson.ca/­bernhard/research/family-gallery/ States, and teaches parents how to communicate index.html. more effectively with children and offers step-by- step advice for resolving family conflicts so every- PATHWAYS TO COMPETENCE FOR YOUNG body wins. Gordon developed the concept of “I” CHILDREN: A PARENTING PROGRAM language and encouraged active listening and win– win problem-solving solutions. His book on this Written by Canadians Sarah Landy and Elizabeth topic is an informative resource. More information Thompson, Pathways to Competence for Young Chil- can be found at dren: A Parenting Program (Landy and Thompson, 2006) is designed to help professionals support par- www.gordontraining.com/parent-programs/ ents in understanding and managing their child’s parent-effectiveness-training-p-e-t. NEL WAYS TO INVOLVE FAMILIES 167 Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. BARBARA COLOROSO’S WINNING school by using effective nonviolent strategies for AT PARENTING managing negative behaviour. The program is pre- Barbara Coloroso has written extensively on sup- sented in four formats: parenting group sessions that porting parents with successful and relevant strategies focus on basic parenting skills, parental communica- for improving family relationships, and she speaks tion, anger management, and promoting children’s throughout the world on these important issues. Her academic skills; a teacher classroom management cassettes, manuals, and DVDs provide positive strat- series; two-hour weekly small therapy sessions for egies for dealing with the challenges of parenting children; and lesson plans that can be delivered one young children. Her work can be explored further to three times a week for teachers. More details in her books: Winning at Parenting without Beating about the program can be found at Your Kids; Kids Are Worth It!: Giving Your Child the www.incredibleyears.com. Gift of Inner Discipline; The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander: From Pre-School to High School—How Parents and Teachers Can Help Break the Cycle of Vio- REACHING IN…REACHING OUT (RIRO) lence; Parenting through Crisis—Helping Kids in Times Building on five years of training more than 3500 of Loss, Grief, and Change, and Parenting with Wit and professionals and paraprofessionals who work with Wisdom in Times of Chaos and Loss. Many of these young children, RIRO and its sponsor, the Child and resources are also available on CD or DVD. Colo- Family Partnership, launched an initiative called roso’s books are also available in Spanish. Visit Resilient Parents—Resilient Kids. The focus is to www.kidsareworthit.com. establish Community Resiliency Hubs in Canadian communities to support families with skills training, information, and resources to help them pass along THE INCREDIBLE YEARS PROGRAM resilience skills to their children. Resources are avail- able at the website below and include a quarterly Developed over 25 years by Carolyn Webster- e-newsletter. Centres may wish to invite a represen- Stratton, the Incredible Years Program is designed to tative to the centre to discuss this initiative. Visit strengthen young children’s social competence and problem-solving abilities while reducing aggression www.reachinginreachingout.com/resources- at home and school. It has been positively and rig- parents.htm. orously evaluated in community settings in Wales, England, and the United States. The program was developed to promote positive, research-proven FILM NIGHT parenting and teaching practices that strengthen Many films have been developed for the express pur- children’s problem-solving abilities and social com- pose of parent education. A film, or two DVDs with petency and reduce aggression at home and in the opposing viewpoints, might be shown and followed INSIDE LOOK One of our concerns at our centre has been the rise in childhood obesity. One of our parents had read Richard Louv’s book Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder. She was so moved by the book that she asked if all the parents could meet to discuss the issues raised in his book. She organized the meeting with the help of other parents and the teachers, who were very excited to learn more about lack of nature and its impact on children. She gave us the Amazon.ca link so that those of us who were interested could order the book ahead of time and read it. She also invited a guest speaker from the Evergreen Foundation to talk to us about how we could do more to encourage active play on the part of the children and how to green our outdoor space. This has been a remarkable time for our centre. Almost all of our families are actively involved in redesigning our playscape and raising funds for a whole new approach to outdoor play at our centre. Who would have thought that one book could have such an impact! 168 CHAPTER 5 NEL Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. up with a discussion. An excellent DVD series and seemed to encourage attendance, particularly that both informs and involves family m ­ embers is when the children had a hand in its preparation. Stanley Greenspan’s Floortime. ALUMNI NIGHT BOOK NIGHT Some families might benefit from advice from par- Family members could be asked to read a relevant ents whose children have moved on to the school book, and then meet to assess the book and discuss system. These parents may be able to answer ques- controversial issues. One book that stimulates discus- tions about the transition and suggest how to make sion is How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So the situation less stressful. Alumni can form networks Kids Will Talk, by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish. with families to discuss issues relevant to the group. A side benefit may be that alumni are often more than BROWN-BAG LUNCHES willing to help with fundraising at the centre, given the strong connection they may still feel. Brown-bag lunch sessions may be most appropriate when the child and family centre is located in a workplace environment. One centre held biweekly FAMILY–TEACHER PANEL DISCUSSIONS sessions on issues that parents had identified in Another way for family members to share their a survey. Each week a centre teacher or a parent expertise is to hold panel discussions. A topic can be introduced a topic, and family members and staff chosen or a series of questions organized and given entered into lively discussions. Family members to the panel in advance. For example, a panel might were free to attend all sessions or only those that consist of one teacher and one family member from were of particular interest. Lunch was provided, each of the age groups in the centre. INSIDE LOOK In order to encourage an interest in books, our centre holds an “I Love Books” event for parents and their children. We begin with a potluck dinner, at which a local storyteller tells some interesting tales. The teachers then give families a short overview of what to look for when buying books for children of different ages, and our local librarian talks about some of the children’s favourite books. Families can purchase books at a display set up by a local bookstore and discuss their purchases with the teachers. This event has been so successful that we are thinking about organizing a Make-a-Book Night, at which par- ents and their children could make and illustrate a book that is then laminated and placed in the family resource area for families to share. INSIDE LOOK When action figures were very popular with the preschool children, the teachers in our centre sent fami- lies a package containing articles about the relationship between violence, children, television, and video games as well as a list of books on the subject. The teachers invited family members to contact them if they were interested in participating in a panel discussion on television and video violence. The response rate was high, so a meeting was scheduled. Families came to the meeting loaded with information, and a serious and heated discussion ensued. Teachers and families struggled with the possible consequences of children’s exposure to action figures. The discussion inspired some parents to learn more about orga- nizations concerned with media violence. These families invited a guest speaker from the Alliance for Children and Television to address the next panel discussion. NEL WAYS TO INVOLVE FAMILIES 169 Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. THE OPEN HOUSE canvas. The next morning, the children painted a An open house provides an opportunity for teachers wash over the canvas to reveal the message left behind. to showcase their playrooms as organized and Active involvement is the better way to engage fami- inviting spaces, to address broad programming lies, rather than having them listen to explanations of issues, and to encourage genuine partnerships with rules and expectations. The open house provides an families. These events may also be opportunities for opportunity to lay the groundwork for authentic and families who are transitioning to a new age group meaningful connections with families. in the centre to meet their “new” teachers and discuss the upcoming changes. It is also an opportunity for TAKING IT ON THE ROAD the families to connect with each other. Some parents Some educators take their meetings to the families. may live in isolation, and the open house may provide Where many families live in the same apartment a real opportunity to make connections with others. building, educators have used party rooms to hold The open house is also an opportunity for meetings; another option is to use a nearby local res- teachers to share more personal information with taurant. Attendance improved tremendously when the families. By relating why they became teachers meetings were held in such locations, and child care and noting their qualifications, their enthusiasm was provided (Graham Clay, 2012). and dedication to the field will become apparent. Educators at one centre asked the children their favourite interest centre in advance, and their par- PARTICIPATION DAYS ents were then invited to start their visit in that Whenever family members can participate, the centre. Educators can set up interesting activities in centre should make every effort to accommodate each of the learning centres—both indoors and out- them. To increase family participation in the pro- doors. Family members can move through the cen- gram, centres may set aside a Saturday for child-care tres, finishing the projects and leaving them behind events. Such an arrangement allows for the involve- for their children to see the next day. ment of families who work during the week. Since In another centre, at the end of the evening, the Saturday may be a religious day for some mem- parents were asked to draw or write a message for bers of the centre, an evening event might be an their child using a white crayon on a small blank alternative. INSIDE LOOK Each spring we have an open house for family members whose children will be transitioning over the summer months to a new playroom. We have found that families have so many questions about this transition that it is helpful to have everyone together at the same time. We explain to families what they might expect from this age group with respect to their emotional, social, physical, language, and cognitive development. We show a video of the children at “work.” Making videos is an integral part of our pro- gram and videos are made of special events and of some everyday occurrences. The children are eager to sign them out and take them home, and they allow parents to get to know other families and children in the room. We set up the room so that activities are available at each of the learning centres. We give par- ents a map with all of the centres located on it and pertinent information recorded. Each centre presents a different challenge. The activities give families a chance to try out the equipment and see firsthand the learning that takes place there. Families receive a handbook that is specific to our room and reviews the material covered during the open house. Finally, we encourage an open dialogue and welcome families to talk about how they might be engaged in our program as we work together to create the best possible environment for their children. We are clear to emphasize that they are the experts on their child and we are anxious to learn from them. It is critical to us that we work together as true partners. To end the open house, we create a bulletin board featuring the work that parents do during the evening. The children are always very excited to see their parents’ work the next day! 170 CHAPTER 5 NEL Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. INSIDE LOOK We asked interested family members to come to the centre to speak to the children about their work experiences or something they wanted to share with the children. We took lots of pictures and the children enjoyed seeing their parents’ pictures around the room and recalling the presentations they came to talk to us about. We also made books that told the story of each parent’s presentation and the children actively used these in their play. Other children built a relationship with their peers’ parents, remembering the wonderful presentations they put on. The children discuss what they learned in the different play areas and what they recalled about certain presentations, for example, “I’m pretending to be a doctor just like Samantha’s mom. I’m making latkes like Shahar’s mom made for us. I’m wearing the Caribana headdress that Denisha’s mom donated to our room.” Source: Reprinted by permission of Mary Bianchi, Esther Exton Child Care Centre, George Brown College. families must play a role in the decision making. See PREPARING FOR EFFECTIVE Figure 5.1 for suggested meeting topics and Exhibit MEETINGS 5.2 for a checklist for organizing meetings. Many families now look for support online, so the “Why should I worry about asking parents meeting’s topic and/or guest speaker must meet the to come to meetings? I’ve knocked myself needs of families to draw them in. In other words, out planning and organizing meetings on the goal for the meeting must be relevant and clear topics I know parents need to know more to everyone. Families will come when they are wel- about. Most parents don’t even bother to comed, respected, and have a voice! In the spirit of show up. Even in the parents who do come, “the buck stops here,” one person should be desig- I don’t see any changes in their behaviour.” nated as the facilitator of the event; depending on the type of meeting, the facilitator could be a family member, a supervisor, or staff person. This comment reflects the “teacher as expert” Although in many cases the early learning envi- approach, and it is unlikely that families would ronment will serve as an appropriate venue, some want to attend a meeting where this teacher will meetings may require a larger gathering space. tell them what they need to know! If the fami- Family members can be good sources of informa- lies perceive that we are starting from a “bad tion about locations within the community that can place” and are worried that their parenting is be booked at nominal cost. being judged, they just won’t come. The meetings When surveying families about meetings, as should instead convey that families have a great mentioned above, family members should also be deal to contribute to the success of the home-to- asked their preferred meeting times. For example, centre collaboration. meetings might be best held at the end of the day Combining meetings for both parties—teachers with a potluck dinner served. Meetings should and families—suggests to families that teachers are also be planned so that family members are able to also interested in lifelong learning. The meetings get their children home in time for their bedtime need to be properly organized; otherwise, family routines. Conversely, a breakfast meeting may be members may attend one or two and never return. especially convenient when the children attend a Their lives are far too busy to set aside time for meet- workplace centre. Families that would struggle to ings that don’t meet their needs. To ensure success, afford a babysitter may benefit from meetings held establish an organizing committee of parents and during the day while the children are at the centre, teachers to survey family members about the types or student volunteers can be sought to offer free of meetings they would be interested in attending. child care for evening programs. Without family involvement, there is little chance Meetings should always begin promptly at their of success. Educators must “share the power” and scheduled time, which will encourage punctuality NEL WAYS TO INVOLVE FAMILIES 171 Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. FIGURE 5.1 Meeting Topics Meeting Topics Sibling rivalry Communication issues Toilet learning Superheroes Language development Nutrition issues Balancing work and family Curriculum development Fostering a love of books Sexuality Influence of TV Separation issues Biting Greening our program Antibiotics and young children Art experiences in the home Preparing a will Death Divorce/separation Gender stereotyping Children’s fears Effective parenting Infant attachment Stress in children and adults Streetproofing Computers and education Travelling with children Physical fitness Community resources for parents First aid/CPR Challenging behaviour Childproofing the home Gardening with children Child development Sleep issues Invite a municipal/federal legislator Violence and young children Hospitalization Media and children Self-esteem INSIDE LOOK The Regina Early Learning Centre is a child and family development centre that works in partnership with low-income families to provide high-quality early childhood and family support programs. Building respectful relationships with families and creating programming that implements the best in early child- hood practice while honouring the values, culture, and goals of parents are hallmarks of the program. The Centre has found providing parent events that combine hands-on experience with guided reflection an effective way of helping parents understand the importance of a play-based, child-centred approach to programming. An example is a parent–teacher supper meeting, which begins with a shared meal with preschool educators and parents. The formal part of the evening begins with parents discussing what they hope their children will learn in preschool. This is followed by parents proceeding to a number of stations where a typical preschool activity is featured. The evening closes with parents reflecting upon what children can learn from the activities they participated in. Source: Reprinted by permission of Mary Ann McGrath, Executive Director. at future meetings. If guest speakers are included, children might assist in the design and, if required, they should come highly recommended and be translation should be provided. An invitation from dynamic and upbeat. Community businesses might the family members involved in the planning of the be willing to underwrite the cost of the event or meeting may be more effective than one from the donate materials. Perhaps an incentive might also centre itself. A variety of media should be used to encourage participation. The family survey can also publicize the upcoming event, and all advertising ask whether family members have access to appro- should be done well in advance. For an example of priate giveaways or door prizes. an invitation, see Figure 5.2. Much thought should go into the preparation A telephone committee might call families closer of the invitations that are sent home to families; to the event as a reminder. A multilingual message 172 CHAPTER 5 NEL Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. can be added to the centre’s telephone message to taken part in the preparations (by creating table encourage participation from all families. A tele- centrepieces, for example, or by making punch). phone tree or an email list service might also be orga- Having special displays set up by the children is also nized. A personal phone call from an “old” parent to a fun incentive to attend. Family members might new families with an offer to drive them to the venue join teachers in volunteering their services as guest may ensure a greater turnout. Having fathers call or chefs. Letting families know that photos will be email may also encourage other men to attend. taken is another way to encourage participation, as When adults-only events are planned, it is impor- everyone looks forward to seeing the photos after tant for the centre to offer child care. Planning spe- the event. cial events for the children is one way to encourage The furniture in the meeting room should be families to attend. One centre arranged for the comfortable and arranged to facilitate communi- children to be entertained by a magician during a cation among all participants. If visuals are used, pizza dinner while the parents attended the annual care should be taken to ensure that everyone has an general meeting. Volunteers or students doing unobstructed view. their field placements in the centre can be recruited Copies of the agenda should be circulated before to assist with child care while teachers attend the the meeting so that families know the expecta- meeting. Incentives offered for attending, such as a tions; an open invitation to add items is always well door prize, are often well received. received. Additional copies of the agenda should be Transportation may be a concern for some fami- available at the meeting. Articles or pamphlets rele- lies; a car-pool signup sheet can assist those parents vant to the agenda should be placed in a conspicuous in need of transportation to or from the meeting. location so families can pick them up as they enter Refreshment breaks also provide an opportunity for or leave the meeting. These materials can also be social interaction. A meeting’s focus is best main- provided to parents who were unable to attend the tained if refreshments are served at the beginning or meeting, along with a summary as a valuable post- end of the meeting. At some events a potluck dinner meeting review for families and teachers. A hand- may be held before the meeting begins. It is always written note indicating that they were missed is a very special for families when their children have personal touch many families appreciate. FIGURE 5.2 Invitation Join us for a potluck BREAKFAST on Tuesday, March 8th and meet Sarah Blevens Sarah is the president of the organization Parents Against Media Violence. She will discuss the role families and teachers can play in advocating for violence-free television. Tuesday, March 8th 8 a.m.–9 a.m. Gross Motor Room NEL WAYS TO INVOLVE FAMILIES 173 Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. EXHIBIT 5.2 Organizing Effective Meetings: A Checklist £ Solicit information from family members on £ Arrange for refreshments that are culturally their preferred type of meeting and topic. appropriate (avoid asking those families who £ Nominate an organizing committee, including would find it financially difficult to bring in food). teachers and family members, and designate a £ Select, organize, and arrange topic-related facilitator. displays. £ Coordinate and delegate responsibilities. £ Prepare handouts for families. £ Canvass the community for donations to host £ View videos ahead of time. the event; invite donors. £ Arrange the furniture to support the format of £ How much time is needed? Is it a one-time event the meeting. or a series of events offered over several weeks? £ Arrange for all necessary audiovisual equip- £ Determine the purpose of the meeting and ment, test all equipment before the meeting establish goals. begins, and ensure the equipment does not £ Invite visitors or guest speakers. block anyone’s view. £ Plan for interpreters, if necessary. £ Adjust the heat or air conditioning. £ Plan and book an accessible location and an £ Remind teachers about personally inviting appropriate meeting date and time. families to attend. £ Post a car-pool signup sheet in advance and £ Telephone or email all families the night before ensure sufficient parking is available. as a final reminder. £ Send families a variety of communiqués well in £ Display large signs at entrances and exits on the advance. meeting day. £ Set up the family bulletin board to increase £ Have name tags ready. interest in the meeting. £ Make sure the videographer is ready to video- £ Prepare publicity inside and outside the centre. tape the event for those who cannot attend. £ Arrange for child care. £ Assume that everything will go wrong and £ Order all necessary props and materials. have back-up plans ready (a flashlight might be useful in an emergency). £ Prepare a meeting agenda. HOW TO RUN EFFECTIVE announcements that are of interest to the group. MEETINGS The location of washrooms and designated smoking areas should also be mentioned. To encourage fami- The facilitator’s role is a critical one. Before the lies to socialize with one another, the following ice- meeting begins, the facilitator needs to ensure breakers are suggested. that the number of attendees is sufficient to reach a quorum, if the meeting requires one. Unless the Mixer Bingo for Families of Younger Children: bylaws specify a procedure for conducting the Parents determine which family members fit meeting, Robert’s Rules of Order is generally used. each of the activities described in Figure 5.3, The facilitator may wish to begin by taking a few and write the name of that person on the line moments to introduce himself or herself, or arrange provided. ahead of time to be introduced by a member of the Envelopes: Parents are given an envelope con- organizing committee. taining five photocopied pages from an ECE The facilitator should welcome families in a supplier’s catalogue, each page depicting a dif- warm and friendly manner. The welcoming address ferent children’s toy and are asked to rank the can also be used to acknowledge guests, to convey toys from most expensive to least expensive. the regrets of those unable to attend, to thank Then, they share their answers with each other those family members and staff who contributed before the facilitator announces the correct to the organization of the meeting, and to make responses. 174 CHAPTER 5 NEL Copyright 2019 Nelson Education Ltd. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. Due to electronic rights, some third party content may be suppressed from the eBook and/or eChapter(s). Nelson Education reserves the right to remove additional content at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. Name Tags: Family members are given a tag. Scavenger Hunt: Families have a tracking sheet They are then asked to decorate the border of and are asked to find things in the centre—their the tag with coloured markers. Finished tags child’s name in three different places, the class are placed in the middle of the floor. Parents rabbit (what’s his name?), and their child’s favou- are asked to choose a tag for themselves and put rite spot in the outdoor playground. They could their name on it. The person who decorated a also ask their child to show them their favourite particular name tag then identifies himself or book, where Nola the cook works, and so on. herself to the person wearing it. Mixer Bingo: Create a fill-in-the-blank bingo Photo Name Tags: Since most parents are iden- game by including comments such as, can name tified as “Renata’s mom” or “Connor’s dad” by two Robert Munsch books; needs a full night’s the children and other parents, name tags could sleep; recently bought a pair of shoes with be made for each family member that include a Velcro; and can name a type of cream used for wallet-size photo of their child and a space for diaper rash. Family members circulate to find the parent’s name. (When official school photos someone to sign up beside each comment. are taken, colour reproductions can be made and stored at the centre for records, individual Meetings should be conducted in an atmosphere in classroom use, and occasions such as this.)

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