1-3 Anger.pdf

Introduction Anger. What exactly might anger mean? What triggers it? Where does it come from? Who does it affect? And most importantly, how can it be solved? Throughout these pages you will see how a single emotional response can affect an entire...

Introduction Anger. What exactly might anger mean? What triggers it? Where does it come from? Who does it affect? And most importantly, how can it be solved? Throughout these pages you will see how a single emotional response can affect an entire society. But more importantly, how can you prevent this outcome? The answer is simple, but many think of it as a step too far from their reach. With simple steps given in these pages, the reader will learn of the solution to overcome anger. Simple steps given throughout and examples from other real people will make the reader better understand this emotional response in order to better themselves and others.  Chapter 1 Chapter Outline: In this chapter you as the reader will better understand not only what anger truly means, but also different types of anger and how they all work. This chapter will also indicate how anger is reflected in society on a broad scale. What does it mean to be 'angry'? First one needs to know what anger is. "Anger is an emotional response related to one's psychological interpretation of having been threatened. Often it indicates when one's basic boundaries are violated. Some have a learned tendency to react to anger through retaliation. Anger may be utilized effectively when utilized to set boundaries or escape from dangerous situations. Anger may have physical correlates such as increased heart rate, blood pressure, and levels of adrenaline and noradrenaline. Some view anger as an emotion which triggers part of the fight or flight brain response. Anger becomes the predominant feeling behaviorally, cognitively, and physiologically when a person makes the conscious choice to take action to immediately stop the threatening behavior of another outside force (Dragon, 2015). The English term originally comes from the term anger of Old Norse language. Anger can have many physical and mental consequences. The external expression of anger can be found in facial expressions, body language, physiological responses, and at times in public acts of aggression. Humans and animals, for example, make loud sounds, attempt to look physically larger, bare their teeth, and stare (Floyd, 2016). The behaviors associated with anger are designed to warn aggressors to stop their 5 threatening behavior. Rarely does a physical altercation occur without the prior expression of anger by at least one of the participants. While most of those who experience anger explain its arousal as a result of "what has happened to them," psychologists point out that an angry person can very well be mistaken because anger causes a loss in self-monitoring capacity and objective observability (Dragon, 2015). Modem psychologists view anger as a primary, natural, and mature emotion experienced by virtually all humans at times, and as something that has functional value for survival. Anger can mobilize psychological resources for corrective action. Uncontrolled anger can, however, negatively affect personal or social well-being. While many philosophers and writers have warned against the spontaneous and uncontrolled fits of anger, there has been disagreement over the intrinsic value of anger (Nafzger, 2018). The issue of dealing with anger has been written about since the times of the earliest philosophers, but modem psychologists, in contrast to earlier writers, have also pointed out the possible harmful effects of suppressing anger. Displays of anger can be used as a manipulation strategy for social influence" (Anger-Wiki, 2019). "One simple dichotomy of anger expression is Passive anger versus Aggressive anger. These two types of anger have some characteristic symptoms: Passive Anger Passive anger can be expressed in the following ways (Floyd, 2016): Dispassion, such as giving someone the cold shoulder or a fake smile, looking 6  unconcerned or "sitting on the fence" whil~ others sort things out, dampening feelings with substance abuse, overreacting, oversleeping, not responding to another's anger, frigidity, indulging in sexual practices that depress spontaneity and make objects of participants, giving inordinate amounts of time to machines, objects or intellectual pursuits, talking of frustrations but showing no feeling. Evasiveness, such as turning one's back in a crisis, avoiding conflict, not arguing back, becoming phobic. Defeatism, such as setting yourself and others up for failure, choosing unreliable people to depend on, being accident prone, underachieving, sexual impotence, expressing frustration at insignificant things but ignoring serious ones. Obsessive behavior, such as needing to be inordinately clean and tidy, making a habit of constantly checking things, over-dieting or overeating, demanding that all jobs be done perfectly. Psychological manipulation, such as provoking people to aggression and then patronizing them, provoking aggression but staying on the sidelines, emotional blackmail, false tearfulness, feigning illness, sabotaging relationships, using sexual provocation, using a third party to convey negative feelings, withholding money or resources. Secretive behavior, such as stockpiling resentments that are expressed behind people's backs, giving the silent treatment or under the breath mutterings, avoiding eye contact, putting people down, gossiping, anonymous complaints, poison pen letters, stealing, and conning. 7  Self-blame, such as apologizing too often, being overly critical, inviting criticism. Aggressive Anger The symptoms of aggressive anger are (Floyd, 2016): Bullying, such as threatening people directly, persecuting, pushing or shoving, using power to oppress, shouting, driving someone off the road, playing on people's weaknesses. Destructiveness, such as destroying objects as in vandalism, harming animals, destroying a relationship, reckless driving, substance abuse. Grandiosity, such as showing off, expressing mistrust, not delegating, being a sore loser, wanting center stage all the time, not listening, talking over people's heads, expecting kiss and make-up sessions to solve problems. Hurtfulness, such as physical violence, including sexual abuse and rape, verbal abuse, biased or vulgar jokes, breaking confidence, using foul language, ignoring people's feelings, willfully discriminating, blaming, punishing people for unwarranted deeds, labeling others. Manic behavior, such as speaking too fast, walking too fast, working too much and expecting others to fit in, driving too fast, reckless spending. Selfishness, such as ignoring others' needs, not responding to requests for help, queue jumping.  Threats, such as frightening people by saying how one could harm them, their property or their prospects, finger pointing, fist shaking, wearing clothes or symbols associated with violent behavior, tailgating, excessively blowing a car horn, and slamming doors. Unjust blaming, such as accusing other people for one's own mistakes, blaming people for your own feelings, making general accusations. Unpredictability, such as explosive rages over minor frustrations, attacking indiscriminately, dispensing unjust punishment, inflicting harm on others for the sake of it, using alcohol and drugs, illogical arguments. Vengeance, such as being over-punitive, refusing to forgive and forget, bringing up hurtful memories from the past." People feel angry when they sense that they or someone they care about has been offended, when they are certain about the nature and cause of the angering event, when they are certain someone else is responsible, and when they feel they can still influence the situation or cope with it. For instance, if a person's car is damaged, they will feel angry if someone else did it (e.g. another driver rear-ended it), but will feel sadness instead if it was caused by situational forces (e.g. a hailstorm) or guilt and shame if they were personally responsible (e.g. he crashed into a wall out of momentary carelessness) (Anger-Wiki, 2019). Usually, those who experience anger explain its arousal as a result of ''what has happened to them" and in most cases the described provocations occur immediately before the anger experience. Such explanations confirm the illusion that anger has a discrete external cause. The angry person usually finds the cause of their anger in an intentional, personal, and 9 controllable aspect of another person's behavior. Thi~ explanation, however, is based on the intuitions of the angry person who experiences a loss in self-monitoring capacity and objective observability as a result of their emotion. Anger can be of multi-causal origin, some of which may be remote events, but people rarely find more than one cause for their anger. According to Novaco, "Anger experiences are embedded or nested within an environmental-temporal context. Disturbances that may not have involved anger at the outset leave residues that are not readily recognized but that operate as a lingering backdrop for focal provocations (of anger)" (Anger-Wiki, 2019). "According to Encyclopredia Britannica, an internal infection can cause pain which in tum can activate anger. Anger makes people think more optimistically. Dangers seem smaller, actions seem less risky, ventures seem more likely to succeed, and unfortunate events seem less likely (Sreenivasarao, 2010). Angry people are more likely to make risky decisions, and make more optimistic risk assessments. In one study, test subjects primed to feel angry felt less likely to suffer heart disease, and more likely to receive a pay raise, compared to fearful people. This tendency can manifest in retrospective thinking as well: in a 2005 study, angry subjects said they thought the risks of terrorism in the year following 9/11 in retrospect were low, compared to what the fearful and neutral subjects thought. In inter-group relationships, anger makes people think in more negative and prejudiced terms about outsiders. Anger makes people less trusting, and slower to attribute good qualities to outsiders. When a group is in conflict with a rival group, it will feel more anger if it is the politically stronger group and less anger when it is the weaker. Unlike other negative emotions like sadness and fear, angry people are more likely to demonstrate correspondence bias - the 10 tendency to blame a person's behavior more on his nature than on his circumstances. They tend to rely more on stereotypes, and pay less attention to details and more attention to the superficial. In this regard, anger is unlike other "negative" emotions such as sadness and fear, which promote analytical thinking (Sreenivasarao, 20 I 0). An angry person tends to anticipate other events that might cause him anger. She/he will tend to rate anger-causing events (e.g. being sold a faulty car) as more likely than sad events (e.g. a good friend moving away). A person who is angry tends to place more blame on another person for his misery. This can create a feedback, as this extra blame can make the angry man angrier still, so he in tum places yet more blame on the other person. When people are in a certain emotional state, they tend to pay more attention to, or remember, things that are charged with the same emotion; so it is with anger. For instance, if you are trying to persuade someone that a tax increase is necessary, if the person is currently feeling angry you would do better to use an argument that elicits anger ("more criminals will escape justice") than, say, an argument that elicits sadness ("there will be fewer welfare benefits for disabled children"). Also, unlike other negative emotions, which focus attention on all negative events, anger only focuses attention on anger-causing events (Anger-Wiki, 2019). Anger can make a person more desiring of an object to which his anger is tied. In a 2010 Dutch study, test subjects were primed to feel anger or fear by being shown an image of an angry or fearful. face, and then were shown an image of a random object. When subjects were made to feel angry, they expressed more desire to possess that object than subjects who had been primed to feel fear. As with any emotion, the display of anger can be feigned or exaggerated. Studies by Hochschild and Sutton have shown that the show of anger is likely to 11 be an effective manipulation strategy in order to change and design attitudes. Anger is a distinct strategy of social influence and its use (i.e. belligerent behaviors) as a goal achievement mechanism proves to be a successful strategy (Anger-Wiki, 2019). Larissa Tiedens, known for her studies of anger, claimed that expression of feelings would cause a powerful influence not only on the perception of the expresser but also on their power position in the society. She studied the correlation between anger expression and social influence perception. Previous researchers, such as Keating, 1985 have found that people with angry face expression were perceived as powerful and as in a high social position. Similarly, Tiedens et al. have revealed that people who compared scenarios involving an angry and a sad character, attributed a higher social status to the angry character. Tiedens examined in her study whether anger expression promotes status attribution. In other words, whether anger contributes to perceptions or legitimization of others' behaviors. Her findings clearly indicated that participants who were exposed to either an angry or a sad person were inclined to express support for the angry person rather than for a sad one. In addition, it was found that a reason for that decision originates from the fact that the person expressing anger was perceived as an ability owner, and was attributed a certain social status accordingly (Anger-Wiki, 2019). Showing anger during a negotiation may increase the ability of the anger expresser to succeed in negotiation. A study by Tiedens et al. indicated that the anger expressers were perceived as stubborn, dominant and powerful. In addition, it was found that people were inclined to easily give up to those who were perceived by them as powerful and stubborn, rather than soft and submissive. Based on these findings Sinaceur and Tiedens have found that people _conceded more to the angry side rather than for the non-angry one. A question raised by 12 Van Kleef et al. based on these findings was whether expression of emotion influences others, since it is known that people use emotional information to conclude about others' limits and match their demands in negotiation accordingly. Van Kleef et al. wanted to explore whether people give up more easily to an angry opponent or to a happy opponent. Findings revealed that participants tended to be more flexible toward an angry opponent compared with a happy opponent. These results strengthen the argument that participants analyze the opponent's emotion to conclude about their limits and carry out their decisions accordingly" (Anger-Wiki, 2019). Three types of anger are recognized by psychologists: The first form of anger, named "hasty and sudden anger" by Joseph Butler, an 18th-century English bishop, is connected to the impulse for self-preservation. It is shared between humans and non-human animals and occurs when tormented or trapped. The second type of anger is named "settled and deliberate" anger and is a reaction to perceived deliberate harm or unfair treatment by others. These two forms of anger are episodic. The third type of anger is called dispositional and is related more to character traits than to instincts or cognitions. Irritability, sullenness and churlishness are examples of the last form of anger (Sparg, 2014). Anger can potentially mobilize psychological resources and boost determination toward correction of wrong behaviors, promotion of social justice, communication of negative sentiment and redress of grievances. It can also facilitate patience. On the other hand, anger can be destructive when it does not find its appropriate outlet in expression. Anger, in its strong form, impairs one's ability to process information and to exert cognitive control over their behavior. An angry person may lose his/her objectivity, empathy, prudence or thoughtfulness 13 and may cause harm to others. There is a sharp distinction between anger and (verbal or physical, direct or indirect) even though they mutually influence each other. While anger can activate aggression or increase its probability or intensity, it is neither a necessary nor a sufficient condition for aggression (Floyd, 2016). Afferent Development Extension of the Stimuli of the Fighting Reactions. "At the beginning of life the human infant struggles indiscriminately against any restraining force, whether it be another human being or a blanket which confines his movements. There is no inherited susceptibility to social stimuli, as distinct from other stimulation, in anger. At a later date the child learns that certain actions, such as striking, scolding, and screaming, are effective toward persons, but not toward things. In adults, although the infantile response is still sometimes seen, the fighting reaction becomes fairly well limited to stimuli whose hurting or restraining influence can be thrown off by physical violence" (Anger-Wiki, 2019). Physical reactions, usually starting with a rush of adrenaline and responses such as an increased heart rate, blood pressure, and tightening muscles; often known as the "fight or flight" response. The cognitive experience of anger, or how we perceive and think about what is making us angry. For example, we might think something that happened to us is wrong, unfair, and undeserved. Behavior, or the way we express our anger. There is a wide range of behavior that signals anger. We may look and sound angry, tum red, raise our voices, clam up, slam doors, storm away, or otherwise signal to others that we are angry. We may also state that 14 we are angry and why, ask for a time-out, request an apology, or ask for something to change. Everyone experiences anger, and it can be healthy. It can motivate us to stand up for ourselves and correct injustices. When we manage anger well, it prompts us to make positive changes in our lives and situations. Mismanaged anger, on the other hand, is counterproductive and can be unhealthy. When anger is too intense, out of control, misdirected, and overly aggressive, it can lead to poor decision making and problem solving, create problems with relationships and at work, and can even affect your health (Floyd, 2016). An Article by Susan Krauss Whitboume, Ph.D. 2010 "Am I the only one who finds it ironic that in an age of "positive psychology," anger has become the dominant socially-expressed emotion? Many politicians have given up even the far;;ade of dignified debate. They push, shove, yell, and scream at the least provocation. In the past, attack ads were a tactic reserved for the most dire situations. But now the attack ad has become the norm, rolled out even before names are on the ballots. The attacks aren't limited to political views, either. Anything and anyone in a politician's life is fair game. Sometimes the attacks occur in "off the record" comments or inadvertently show up in recorded voice mail messages. Even people not running for office are on the attack, as when Jimmy Carter recently criticized Senator Edward Kennedy's strategies to pass health care legislation. There's no lack of theories about the origins of a society with a permanent case of the terrible two's. It's the bad economy, the lack of stability in the home, the failure of teachers to instill manners in young children, the anonymity of the internet, the intrusiveness of government, or maybe the chemicals in our food. Brain researchers talk about amygdalas 15 (emotion-controlling structures in the brain) that are too large, or amygdalas that are too small, or pre-frontal cortexes (planning centers in the brain) that aren't sufficiently developed. Social psychologists point to the role of modeling and vicarious reinforcement in triggering aggressive behavior. Personality psychologists attribute aggressive outbursts to weak superegos. Everyone's got a theory but no one has a handle on what's really going on. Now's here's the part where you think-ok-she's got the answers. She'll say what the ultimate, definite, psychological explanation is for the cause of anger. Don't get mad, because I don't have the answers. But the theories I've just rattled off aren't bad starts at coming up with an explanation, particularly those that emphasize social factors. Amygdalas aside, there does seem to be some ungluing of the social order that we are all witnessing. Reality TV, the 24-hour news cycle, the increasing polarization of the political parties, and the frustration of dealing with two wars and a shrinking global economy all seem to have contributed to our social malaise. I also think there are some smaller and more subtle ways that we've lost some of our manners. For example, think about how some TV shows depict people being helped by some of our most respected professionals-physicians, nurses, lawyers, and police officers. Ifa patient on Grey's Anatomy, for example, doesn't like the diagnosis he's received, he curses at the physician. In one particularly egregious example, a disgruntled widower shoots everyone he can in the hospital where his wife lost her life. True, it was a season finale and therefore given to hyperbole. But on an ordinary episode almost everyone speaks to everyone else as if they were sworn enemies. Observation of aggressive behavior, particularly when that behavior doesn't lead to 16 negative consequences, could be more important than we realize in provoking angry outbursts. Studies of human behavior involve many potentially confounding factors, which is why many researchers in this area have traditionally studied nonhuman animals. One recent study conducted at Loyola University, tested the fascinating notion that brain chemistry and passive observation of aggressive behavior together produce heightened aggressive tendencies in lab rats. The rats who watched aggressive behavior in other rats responded by developing more neural receptivity in their amygdalas than rats who did not observe aggression. So just by watching their, shall we say, rodent colleagues, bash each other, the observers developed greater potential to experience aggression themselves. Ironically, it was the Tom and Jerry style of violent TV cartoons of the 1950s that led social psychologists to investigate the role of modeling in childhood aggression. Arguments made in human studies, that more violent kids watch more violent shows, were hauled out to counter the conclusion that aggression breeds aggression. This is one reason the Loyola study, and others like it that experimentally manipulate exposure to aggression in lab animals, are particularly valuable. We might wonder, well, where did the aggression that gets modeled start from? Presumably, aggression and anger have always been around. There's never going to be a complete end to violence. The issue is what are the consequences are of aggressive behavior? If there are no obvious costs, the behavior will continue and eventually escalate. If the diagnosis is that there's too much rage, violence, and unbridled aggression perpetrated in the media, what's the cure? It's undoubtedly too late to stop the tide; although, we might hope that Miss Manners will make a much needed return. Instead, it's up to us to recognize when we are being inappropriate and put the curbs on our own aggression. It's the old "do unto others... " at work. 17 Here are ways that you can contribute to a kinder, gentler world: I. The next time a stranger makes you angry, smile at the person. Not only will this disann the offender, who probably doesn't expect this, but the stop in the action can put some perspective on the situation. 2. Take a chill pill. The old remedy of counting to 10 isn't such a bad idea. Stop, take a few deep breaths, and regain your composure. 3. Try to understand where your own anger is coming from. Do you get unreasonably mad at people with very little instigation? Perhaps someone treated you badly when you were younger or you felt deprived and thus easily fall prey to real or imagined hurt. You can learn to control your hostility through anger management, as I showed in an earlier posting. 4. Refuse to pay attention to aggressive acts. Resist the temptation to contribute to the viral spread of angry outbursts in social media. If a politician screamed and no tweets were sent, would that politician continue to scream? 5. Take the other person's perspective. If someone annoys you because that person is giving you disappointing information, don't assume the person wants to make you feel bad. Customer service agents, for the most part, don't want to charge you extra, take away things you want, or cause you to wait for hours in line. hnagine that you had this job, and cut the person some slack. You may even get better service (Whitbourne, 2010). "Maybe, by controlling our own rage, we can cure the world, one polite act at a time." 18  What Is the Root Cause of a Spirit of Anger? Anger is a serious problem. What causes it? The root cause of a spirit of anger is tension from past hurts and guilt. This mixture of pain and guilt is cumulative and it erupts in anger when new offenses remind us of past experiences. Most people assume that hurtful events in the past will be forgotten and will have no effect on the future. That is not true. Past hurts do not just go away, nor does guilt simply disappear after a wrong response to a situation. Unless these experiences are resolved through repentance and forgiveness, we will continue to experience bouts of anger when our tension points are triggered. We must recognize and resolve hurts and guilt. Anger is a universal problem. It is not limited to one age group, culture, race, economic level, social status, educational background, or any other classification. Unresolved anger is one of the chief contributing factors to the destruction of marriages, the breakdown of families, and the weakening of communities. It is a major cause of health problems and lack of productivity in the workplace, and it is a common denominator among juvenile delinquents (Anger Resolution Seminar, 2018). Recognize Pain from the Past The following situations often lead us into bitterness, where we typically lash out in wrath, revenge, or other hurtful responses. The Pain of Rejection The pain of rejection is one of the strongest factors in a person's life, especially in childhood. A child forms strong attachments to parents, friends, and relatives and finds security in these relationships. When those who are trusted communicate rejection, the child's secure 19 world collapses and he faces a host of fears. The pain of rejection and the torment of fears can cause the child to develop deep bitterness toward the one who is responsible for his pain. When parents get divorced, their children typically experience the pain of rejection (Anger Resolution Seminar, 2018). The Reaction to Unchangeable Features of Our Lives One of the greatest challenges facing every young person is that of accepting unchangeable features, such as physical appearance, mental capabilities, birth order, race, brothers and sisters, and parents. When someone mocks or ridicules a child who is already insecure, it is a devastating blow to his self-esteem. Ridicule does not just attack a child's actions-it mocks him as a person. One who experiences ridicule will be extremely sensitive to anyone else who ridicules him or others. The anger he feels is motivated by a desire for the just punishment of anyone who mocks others (Root of Anger). The Grief of Favoritism When parents favor one child over another, they are not only damaging the self-worth of the child who is less appreciated, but they are also encouraging him or her to react toward the one who is favored. Favoritism to one will be seen as rejection by the other. The Biblical example of Jacob's favor of Joseph over the rest of his sons is a classic example of this situation. Joseph's brothers resented the favor Joseph received, and they sold him into slavery. Then they led Jacob to believe that Joseph had died (Genesis 39). The Anguish of False Accusations A person's reputation has great worth. Solomon wrote, "A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches, and loving favor rather than silver and gold" (Proverbs 22: 1). A false 20 accusation not only damages the one who is accused, but it also stirs up indignation and a desire to see the false accuser brought to justice. The mixture of guilt and pain that surrounds the memory of these experiences triggers anger when we hear of or face similar situations. Can you recall a past experience that deeply hurt you? How do similar situations cause you to express anger now (Manichander)? Pinpoint Sinful Attitudes and Actions Along with painful experiences, our own tendencies toward sin foster a spirit of anger. The following attitudes and actions lead to guilt and anger: Pride Pride is assuming authority that does not belong to us. Many conflicts arise simply because we step into another's jurisdiction with efforts to control. No wonder others react to us in this situation. In turn, the rejection we experience as a result can then lead to more expressions of anger, which are often accompanied by bitterness (Root of Anger). Personal faults When we fail in specific areas, we tend to be very alert to other people who fail in the same areas. Unfortunately, the frustration we have toward ourselves is often redirected to them through harsh judgment. Also, when someone hurts or offends us, his or her actions may be partially justified, which can trigger an explosive combination of guilt and bitterness (Root of Anger). Generalizations If someone who represents another group or race hurts us, we tend to project the 21 misbehavior of one onto the entire group and often develop a general animosity toward everyone who is associated with that group. Expectations When people make promises and fail to keep them, we tend to hold that against them and become resentful of their failure to fulfill our expectations. When we expect certain behavior or benefits from others--especially those who are closest to us-and they do not act as we expect, this resentment can also occur. Envy Envy is bitterness toward another person who has received something we want and we think we deserve. Envy is a form of anger that might not be obvious to others until something triggers an angry outburst or reaction by the envious person. Taking Up Offenses One of the most entangling causes of bitterness occurs when a person who was not directly involved in an offensive situation takes up an offense on behalf of the one who was offended. This kind of bitterness is deep-seated and often endures even after the one who was offended forgives the offender. When we become angry, we should identify the past experiences and personal failures that are contributing to our current frustration and seek to resolve them. Often, situations that are similar to ones in which we were hurt or in which we failed to do the right thing will trigger our anger. Usually the stronger the anger, the more pain and guilt there are from the past (Davids, 2018). "Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: and be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, 22 even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you" (Ephesians 4:31-32) An Article by Curtis Wourtex "Anger is just one of the main problems with society. It is totality normal to be angry, but the way you handle it matter greatly. Sadly some individuals just seem incredibly bad at it. The difficulty arises when we are unable to control our anger. By not controlling anger we can lead our actions to take an awful tum. By having a lack of control over your actions does not merely hurt yourself, your loved ones, but additionally others. It really is pretty very easy to find a person who is very nice to everyone close to him/her, but when he/she meets someone else they completely change. Regardless of whether you don't know anybody who is like that - which is hard to believe, you almost certainly have been a victim of such a person. Remember the last time your boss has bullied you around on his "off day", or when a cashier in a shop seemed to perform everything to just offend you off? All of us have his or her own strategy to release this emotion some of just doing it in a different way. Some just do it wrong- I will be brave and say it. For individuals with such troubles anger courses have been established. Because of such lessons anger can be kept in check. Those lessons have been through a major revolution and today are dominating the web market. Living in an anger free world is among one of my dreams. I hope that one day as a result of anger lessons we'll be able to try and do so. It might be all wishfully thinking living in a world without poverty, crime or stress. Even if we don't make an effort to be hypocrites living in such a world is still just a dream. Let's start changing the planet by starting to change ourselves. We have a great deal of energy and we all have to have a proper way to release it. By physical exercise or writing a diary we are able to 23 lower our stress towards the minimum. It all has been already proven. This change into an optimistic human being can easily be made just by utilizing a pen and paper. It would be simple to live in such a globe if everyone did those few things every day for thirty minutes. By concluding this short article, I must point out that anger conditions are one of reasons why our society is where it is currently. Anger conditions are not merely due to lack of understanding, but in addition by poverty. It does not hurt to gain information and knowledge. Even though we can't stop poverty we can at least learn. Visit my site on anger conditions to learn for free how you are able to start coping with this issue. If you seriously think your trouble has deep roots it could be easier to try out an anger program, I've went through almost all of the key ones and brought out a winner - anger management training. I will give you some of the money-back - this is how sure I'm you will like it. You have found this article, all I want from you is to take action today and start living a life without anger." (Wourtex, 2011). Chapter 2 Chapter Outline: In this chapter the reader will learn of the beginning examples of anger and how the bible includes many examples. This chapter will include how Christianity affects the world and how it might be the best solution to solving anger. "Anger has no original date because anger is an emotional that can't easily be removed from one's mind. Though there is no date, there are still individuals that are highlighted due to their anger in all forms of history. One of the most popular history books including anger would 24 be The Bible. Some brief examples would include (Anger-Wiki, 2019): Moses was angry with God for mistreating his people: "Lord, why have you mistreated [lit done evil to] this people?" (Exodus 5 :22). Naomi was angry with God after the death of her husband and two sons: "The Almighty has dealt bitterly with me. The Almighty has brought calamity upon me" (Ruth 1:20-21 abr). Elijah was angry with God after the son of the widow died: "O Lord my God, have you brought calamity even upon the widow with whom I am staying, by killing her son" (1 Kings 17:20). Job was angry with God: "You have turned cruel to me; with the might of your hand you persecute me" (Job 30:21 ). Jeremiah was angry with God for deceiving his people: "Ah, Lord God, how utterly you have deceived this people and Jerusalem" (Jeremiah 4: 10). "Sometimes your emotions and responses to life's challenges can result in moments of anger and frustration. How you handle those feelings can have a great impact on the outcome of your circumstance." (Moses: His Anger And What It Cost Him, 2017). "How Christianity Affects Society: Impact on the Value of Human Life Human Rights The concept of universal human rights and equality comes exclusively from the biblical 25 idea that all people are created in the image of God. Women. In ancient cultures, a wife was the property of her husband. Aristotle said that a woman was somewhere between a free man and a slave. According to the book, Reasons for God by Tim Keller (p. 249), "It was extremely common in the Greco-Roman world to throw out new female infants to die from exposure, because of the low status of women in society. The church forbade its members to do so. Greco-Roman society saw no value in an unmarried woman, and therefore it was illegal for a widow to go more than two years without remarrying. But Christianity was the first religion to not force widows to marry. They were supported financially and honored within the community so that they were not under great pressure to remarry if they didn't want to. Pagan widows lost all control of their husband's estate when they remarried, but the church allowed widows to maintain their husband's estate. Finally, Christians did not believe in cohabitation. If a Christian man wanted to live with a woman he had to marry her, and this gave women far greater security. Also, the pagan double standard of allowing married men to have extramarital sex and mistresses was forbidden. In all these ways Christian women enjoyed far greater security and equality than did women in the surrounding culture (Keller, 2008). See Rodney Stark, The Rise of Christianity." In India, widows were voluntarily or involuntarily burned on their husbands' funeral pyres. Christian missionaries were a major influence in stopping these century-old practices and ideas. Children In the ancient world, for example in classical Rome or Greece, infanticide was not only legal, it was applauded. Killing a Roman was murder, but it was commonly held in Rome that killing one's own children could be an act of beauty. Through a higher view of life, it was the 26 early Christian church that ultimately brought an e~d to infanticide. The modem pro-life movement is largely Christian. This pro-life view has been true from the very beginning of Christianity. A Christian document called the Didache, dated from the late first century or early second century, contained instructions against abortion. Slavery While it is true that Christians have owned slaves in history, it is clear that this was a distortion of biblical teaching. (See Misconceptions, item #12.) Early Christianity elevated the roles of those oppressed in society, by for example, accepting women and slaves as full members. Slaves participated equally in worship and the community and were afforded contract and property rights. According to historian Glenn Sunshine in his book Why You Think the Way You Do, "Christians were the first people in history to oppose slavery systematically. Early Christians purchased slaves in the markets simply to set them free." It is also true that slavery was ended in great measure by Christian activists. For example, historians credit the British evangelical William Wilberforce as the primary force behind the ending of the international slave trade (which happened prior to the American Civil War). Two-thirds of the members of the American abolition society in 1835 were Christian ministers. Gladiators A 5th century monk, Telemachus is credited as being the pivotal force ending the gladiator spectacles. Cannibalism Missionary followers of Jesus are credited with stopping cannibalism in many primitive societies. 27 Compassion and Mercy Kennedy and Newcombe in their boo~ detail the rise of charity in the name of Jesus over the centuries. This is in stark contrast to history before Jesus. Historians record that prior to Jesus, the ancient world left little trace of any organized charitable effort. An important aspect of Jesus' ministry was his emphasis on helping the neediest and lowliest in society. For example, his Parable of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:30-37) is a classic illustration that is still part of our language today. While there are good charitable efforts outside of the name of Jesus, Kennedy and Newcombe argue that Christian charities stand out. They point to Mother Theresa, the Salvation Anny, religious hospitals, and church supported soup kitchens and thrift shops in every community. Jesus has had such an enormous impact on charity that one wonders how different things would be if he had never been born. D'Souza points out: "This is our culture's powerful emphasis on compassion, on helping the needy, and on alleviating distress even in distant places. If there is a huge famine or reports of genocide in Africa, most people in other cultures are unconcerned. As the Chinese proverb has it, 'the tears of strangers are only water.' But here in the West we rush to help.... Part of the reason why we do this is because of our Christian assumptions.... The ancient Greeks and Romans did not believe this. They held a view quite commonly held in other cultures today: yes, that is a problem, but it is not our problem.... However paradoxical it seems, people who believed most strongly in the next world did the most to improve the situation of people living in this one." Marriage and Family As explained by D'Souza, before the Christian era, pederasty and homosexuality were 28 not considered wrong: "Christianity exalte~ heterose~.ual monogamous love, which would provide the basis for a lasting and exclusive relationsll.ip between husband and wife, oriented toward the rearing of children. We take the family so rnuch for granted-it remains such a powerful ideal in our society, even when actual family life falls short- that we forget the central premises on which it is based. Those premises were introduced by Christianity into a society to which they were completely foreign." Education From the beginning of Judaism, from which Christianity is derived, there was an emphasis on the written word. But the phenomeno11 of education for the masses has its roots in the Protestant Reformation. In order to promote Bible literacy, Christians have been leaders in education. This trend was accelerated with the advent of the printing press at about the same time as the Protestant Reformation. Many of the world's languages were first set to writing by Christian missionaries in order for people to read the Bible. In America, the first law to require education of the masses was passed by the Puritans. The law was called "THE OLD DELUDER SATAN ACT." This name was a reference to the devil, who Christians believe gets his foothold into people's lives because of their ignorance of Scripture. For the first 200 years in America, children's reading texts emphasized biblical literacy. The emphasis on literacy was so intense in colonial America, that John Quincy Adams said in the early 1800's that the illiteracy rate was only 4/10th of 1 percent. By comparison, it has been estimated that in America today, 40 million people are functionally illiterate. All but one of the first 123 colleges in colonial America were Christian institutions. While these universities have lost their Christian identities, it is interesting to read the founding 29 statements of these schools. Harvard, for example, was founded on this statement: Let every student be plainly instructed, and earnestly pressed to consider well, the main end of his life and studies is, to know God and Jesus Christ which is eternal life (John 17:3). Government of the People While America's constitutional government is not specifically Christian, it can be argued that its roots are taken from biblical doctrines. Here are just a few possible arguments in this regard: America's first constitution was the Fundamental Orders of Connecticut. The Puritan framers of this document required that each aspect of it be grounded in Scripture. Other constitutions to follow contained many similarities to this one. At least 50 of the 55 signers of the U.S. Constitution were orthodox Christians. There is no doubt that the concept of our Constitutional checks and balances system is a direct result of the biblical doctrine of the sinfulness of mankind. All of our founders understood the importance of this doctrine to the social order. America's foundational idea of The Rule of Law rather than the authority of man traces back to the Old Testament, beginning with the Ten Commandments. The idea that all men are created equal as enshrined in the Declaration of Independence is a biblical doctrine. The notion of the sovereign authority of God (as mentioned in the Mayflower Compact, the Declaration of Independence, all 50 state constitutions, our currency, etc.)- rather than the sovereignty of the state--is certainly biblical. 30  The existence of moral absolutes (a biblical CO!}cept) is an important idea in our Declaration of Independence - specifically, self-evident truths and unalienable rights from the Creator. Many other aspects of our laws come directly from the Bible--for example the judicial, legislative and executive branches trace to Isaiah 33:22. Fair trials with witnesses have numerous Old and New Testament support. Regarding civil liberty, founding father John Adams (and others) emphasized 2 Corinthians 3: 17 as the basis for American civil liberty. The slogan on the Liberty Bell is "Proclaim Liberty throughout the land unto all the Inhabitants Thereof' is from Leviticus 15:10. Kennedy and Newcombe argue that Jesus himself was the greatest civil libertarian of all time. "Here we see, in its embryo, the idea of limited government. This idea derives from the Christian notion that the ruler's realm is circumscribed and there are limits beyond which he simply must not go... Our modem idea of limited government takes the Christian notion of space that is off-limits to state control and extends it to the whole private sphere.... The separation of the realms should not be a weapon against Christianity; rather it is a device supplied by Christianity to promote social peace, religious freedom, and a moral community. If we recovered the concept in its true sense, our society would be better off." (Dinesh D'Souza) Science Kennedy and Newcombe also argue that science has its roots in Christianity. They point out that other world religions may express a worldview of fatalism (everything is fatalistically determined) or of illusion (that the physical world is an illusion). Science could not have arisen 31 from these worldviews. Christianity on the other hand, is based on the notion that there exists a rational God who is the source of rational truth. This, they argue, gave rise to the possibility of scientific laws. Evidence for this view is that nearly all the founders of modem science were Christians. These include men such as Keppler, Boyle, Pascal, Pasteur, Newton, etc. Free Enterprise and the Work Ethic Private property rights can be traced to the Ten Commandments in Exodus 20: 15, 17, "Thou shalt not steal. Thou shalt not covet." - as well as to other passages from the Old and New Testaments. Interestingly, there are over 700 references to money in the Bible! It is noteworthy that Adam Smith's Wealth of Nations was written in 1776, the same year as the birth of America. But many historians credit theologian John Calvin from 200 years earlier as the person who is most responsible for putting together the principles that were always in the Bible into a system adapted by the American founders. For example, the biblical doctrines of self-reliance and self-denial are the foundation of the famous "Protestant work ethic." These doctrines are at the heart of our economic (and political) way oflife. A distinction can be made between biblical capitalism and evolutionary capitalism. The emphasis on biblical capitalism is on the importance of servanthood - a key teaching of Jesus. Evolutionary capitalism, on the other hand, relies solely on the survival of the fittest. Anyone who doubts the relationship of biblical ideas to free enterprise need only to note the stark contrast with communism. Communism is specifically an atheistic system that relies on the non-biblical notion that all men are good (thus will work for the common good). But communism has been an abject economic failure. As put by D'Souza, "The system of modem capitalism arose in the West. To some it is surprising that capitalism developed so easily in conjunction with a Christian ethic. But 32 capitalism satisfied the Christian demand for an institution that channels selfish human desire toward the betterment of society. Some critics accuse capitalism of being a selfish system, but the selfishness is not in capitalism- it is in human nature.... While profit remains the final goal, entrepreneurs spend the better part of each day figuring out how better to serve the needs of their actual and potential customers. They are operationally, if not intentionally, altruistic.... One may say that capitalism civilizes greed in much the same way that marriage civilizes lust." Art, Music, Literature The influence of Jesus on art, music, and literature is enormous. For example, the Christian faith has influenced literature in such Christian writers such as Dante, Chaucer, Donne, Dostoevsky, Shakespeare, Dickens, Milton, etc. Had Jesus never been born, music would likely sound very different from what we're used to. There may never have developed the cantata, the concerto, or the symphony. Handel, Vivaldi, and Bach were Christians who worked to honor God with their work. Bach, for example, signed all his works with Soli Deo Gloria ("Solely to the glory of God"). Art has likewise been magnificently impacted by Jesus. While much modem art seems to debase the human spirit, classical Christian art tries to bring out the best of mankind- pointing us to a higher plane. This is certainly a tribute to Jesus. And think of all the incredible architecture through the years. Especially noteworthy are the beautiful cathedrals in Europe. Contrary Evidence Kennedy and Newcombe address the criticism of some who point to atrocities in history committed in the name of Christianity- specifically the Crusades, the Inquisition, the Salem witch hunts, and anti-Semitism. The authors acknowledge the sinful nature of these events. But 33 they argue that those who committed them were acting contrary to the teachings of Christ, who taught to love even your enemies! The blame for committing such acts should be placed on those who perverted Jesus' teachings - not at the feet of the Prince of Peace! However, it should also be mentioned that many historians say that Christians have gotten a bad rap from the above events. For example, it can be said that all of the Crusades were defensive in nature-in the same way that one can accurately say that America's current War on Terrorism is defensive in nature. America is responding to an unprovoked attack first made upon us. Our goal in this war is simply to protect our citizens and our property. This is the same thing that the Christian Crusaders were doing, acting in self-defense against aggressors. And in the case of the Inquisition, Kennedy has stated that he is convinced that the people leading the Inquisition were not Christians at all. "In every case in which Christians are blamed for violence, a closer look largely exonerates Christians." Further, they point out that when Christian restraints have been removed from a society, the atrocities are magnified many times over. For example, the regimes of Hitler, Mao, Stalin, and Pol Pot were essentially atheistic bloodbaths. These twentieth century despots alone account for well over 100 million murders. The evidence is strong that when the restraining influence of Christianity has been removed from a country or culture, unmitigated disaster will naturally follow. As admitted by existentialist philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre, "[Without God] all activities are equivalent." Summary "An overarching theme given to the world by Christianity is the equality of human beings, and the preciousness and worth of every human life. As put by D'Souza, "This Christian 34 idea was the propelling force behind the campaign to end slavery, the movement for democracy and popular self-government, and also the successful attempt to articulate an international doctrine of human rights. My celebration of Christianity's role in shaping these great social changes comes with a sober corollary: if the West gives up Christianity, it will also endanger the egalitarian values that Christianity brought into the world. The end of Christianity also means the systematic erosion of values like equal dignity and equal rights that both religious and secular people cherish." If secularism continues to gain, so will the restoration of infanticide, demands for the radical redefinition of the family, the revival of eugenic theories of human superiority, the suppression of freedoms of religion and expression, etc., as well as political tyranny." (The Impact of Christianity) How Can Jesus Help Me with My Anger Management Issues? "I have a bit of an anger management problem, how do I get over it? And how can Jesus help me with it? -Beth Hi Beth, There is so much to say and consider in such a short space. To begin with, we have to accept that anger is a normal emotion. It is one of the emotions we bear as being created the image of our Creator. Indeed even God himselfgets 35 angry! Anger comes about because we are hurt or let down (either deliberately or not). God gets angry with Israel because they keep on forgetting him and doing the things he has told them not to do or not doing the things he wants them to do. He is angry with us because we have failed to treat him as God in our lives (that by the way is what sin is about). The problem with our anger in general is that we react to it in ways that are not helpful or way out ofproportion to the hurt felt. In this way anger can disrupt and destroy relationships that are important to us. In the heat of the moment we want to be proved right or may even want to inflict hurt. We will say and do things that we regret later on. I imagine that I am not saying anything that you do not already understand. So the issue with anger is not so much that you get angry but why and what to do about it. Understanding why will help help you work out how to deal with it. I think here the example ofJesus is most helpful. God always uses his anger to bring about his good purposes. Unlike us, he does not let this anger overcome him so that he loses control. Rather he works patiently through history to bring about his plans. What drives him is not his anger but a far more potent and powerful emotion - love. Paul writes this: "God demonstrates his own love for us in this: while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:6-11) Let me unpack this a little. Paul is saying that while we were God's enemies, rebelling against him and making him angry, God acted by sending his son to die in our place. He acted not out of his anger (which he has every right to be) but out of his love to bring forgiveness. To me the two key elements here are love and forgiveness. The christian experience of God's overwhelming love leads us in turn to love others. In the same way the christian experience of 36 Gods forgiveness leads us to forgive others. Neither of these things is easy, especially in the midst of anger but they are what we are to aim for. In Mark 11:25, we read of the importance offorgiveness. Forgiveness is described as being necessarily present before we can know the forgiveness of God for our sins. Matthew 5: 21-26, covers anger,forgiveness and reconciliation. As Jesus clearly teaches, we should always try to make amends with people that we have fallen out offriendship with. It may not always be the case that others are prepared to forgive us when we have wronged them, but the act of expressing our remorse to them is essential. Through this act we are communicating our own desire for peace with the other person, as well as Gods requirement towards everyone of love and forgiveness. Forgiveness is often a process. Even ifwe may still feel anger towards the one who has hurt us, and the effects of the damage - (emotional pain and other problems), are still with us, we can still be in an attitude offorgiveness to that person. We are effectively controlling our anger and inviting God to deal with it. Rather than the anger turning bad, and causing hate, we acknowledge it, state forgiveness and refuse through sheer will to engage in thoughts of bitterness, revenge or hate. Afeeling of complete forgiveness may take a significant amount of time and effort to reach but it is worth it in the end. Forgiveness is not just a declaration or afeeling, it is also an action. Forgiveness does not mean that we sweep the hurt under the carpet as if it never happened. Forgiveness and love for the other may mean we need to deal with the hurt and the circumstances that brought it about. But it is now done in the light of bringing about reconciliation and doing good for the other (e.g. helping them to recognize and change a wrong behavior). After all God did not 37 simply sweep our sin under the carpet and forget it, he acted by sending his Son to take the punishment we deserve. Now I have said before that none of this is easy as I am sure you are aware. So God is there to help. He knows what it is like to be human (after all Jesus lived as a human) and he is willing to help. So turn to him and ask for help. When you are angry try to simply direct a thought at him - "Help me not lose control but act in love and forgive. " It would be good to find other christian people who you trust that you can confide in and talk about these things with. They can pray for you and with you. But most importantly you need to ask yourself have you experienced the love and forgiveness of God yourself? I have no idea ifyou are a Christian or ifyou know of Gods love for you and his overwhelming gift offorgiveness. A christian s love for others stems.from Gods love for us and a christian s ability to forgive others stems.from the fact that we have already been forgiven by God himself Ifyou do not know this love and forgivness than this is where you need to start. Open a bible and start reading Marks gospel and ask yourself "Who do you think Jesus is?" You can a/so look at http://www.christianity.net.au/god to get an overview of what a Christian is. And, of course, you can continue to ask us questions. " David (n.d) Retrieved from https://christianity.net.au/guestions/how can jesus help me with my anger management iss ues 38  Chapter 3 Chapter Outline: In this chapter the roles of characters in the bible are a prime example of how anger is treated. These examples are made in the past to better the future by teaching Christians the best ways to solve troubling problems, specifically anger. Biblical Examples Jonah: Disappointed in God Jonah 3-4 The people of Nineveh were enemies of Israel. They were an exceptionally cruel, wicked, and idolatrous people who sought dominion over the entire region. They employed brutal warfare to conquer others. Why did Jonah get so angry (4:1-3)? What do you think he had hoped would happen? Has life----or the Lord-disappointed you in some way? Describe what happened and how you feel today. Martha: Disappointed in another Person Luke 10:38-42 Can you relate to Martha's frustration (v. 39-40)? Why or why not? Adam Clarke's commentary views Martha's hospitality as a demonstration of her generous and benevolent spirit. But in love and devotion to Christ, she prepared more food than 39 necessary - this is why she needed Mary's help. What was Martha's root problem, according to Jesus (vv. 41-42)? Think about a recent time when you were angered by another person because he (or she) didn't meet your expectations. Why do you think your disappointment turned to anger? Judas: Disappointed in Himself Matthew 27:1-5 What did Judas realize (vv. 3-4)? What indicates that he could not forgive himself (v. 5)? If you are angry with yourself because of past sins or mistakes, confess your shortcoming and remember that the Lord's love for you is unconditional. Why can you be confident that God doesn't hold your sin against you (Romans 8: 1-2; 1 John 1:9)? Handling Disappointment Correctly Depending on the nature of the disappointment, your response should include some of the following. (The order will vary.) 1. Express your feelings to the Lord. God already knows how you feel and why. But pouring your heart out to Him prepares you to experience His love and comfort. What reasons did David have to be disappointed (Psalm 22:2, 6-8, 11-18)? David responded to hardship by trusting in the Lord and praying for deliverance. Why is this a good way to diffuse anger caused by disappointment? 40  2. Remind yourself that God is still in control, and He has the highest good in mind for you. As a part of declaring trust in the Lord, what did David recall (Psalm 22:4-5, 9- 10)? How could you apply his approach to your life? Describe his emotions at the end of the Psalm (vv. 26-31). What is God's ultimate goal for believers (Romans 8:29)? Describe a disappointment that developed your character. What did you learn through that experience? We often interpret Romans 8:28 to mean that if one option doesn't work out, a better option will come along. But from the Lord's perspective, our character development - rather than our comfort or desires - is of the highest importance. In times of trouble, we can choose to focus on the spiritual truths God is teaching us. 3. When the opportunity to fulfill a dream has passed, ask the Lord for a new goal. Read Psalm 37:1-6. Why should we not fret when others mistreat us (vv. 1-2)? What should we tum our attention to instead (vv. 3-4)? What does God promise ifwe will do that (vv. 5-6)? Proverbs 13:12 says, "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but desire fulfilled is a tree of life." If you need a new vision for your life, ask the Father to give you one. 4. Reaffirm your hope in God as your provider. 41  What needs does the Father promise to meet (Matthew 6:30-34)? When God does not meet practical needs--such as money for the bills or healing for a sick body-what promise do we have (Philippians 4:11-13)? What happens within us if we cast our anxiety on the Lord (vv. 6-7)? In other words, even in times of lack, we can experience supernatural joy and peace as we place our trust in our heavenly Father. Disappointments can serve as reminders to place our hope fully in the Lord. 5. Move on. Why is it so important that we "forget the former things" (Isaiah 43: 18-19)? What things might God want us to remember about the past? What new venture or challenge do you think the Lord wants you to focus on instead of dwelling on your disappointments? God doesn't want us to get stuck in the past-either regretting mistakes and lost opportunities or reminiscing about "the good old days." Closing: When life takes an unexpected tum, we don't have to respond in anger. Ask the Lord for fresh hope and a new vision. That's a prayer He will be sure to answer. Prayer: Father, teach me to deal with disappointments in a healthy way. When they make me angry, show me bow to respond so that I will not give Satan a foothold in my life. In Jesus name I pray. Amen." (http://www.intouch.org/you/bib le-studies/content.aspx ?topic=Disappointment_study) 42  Jonah's Story: Jonah Goes to Nineveh Jonah 1:1-2, 3-10 "Then the word of the Lord came to Jonah a second time: "Go to the great city of Nineveh and proclaim to it the message I give you." Jonah obeyed the word of the Lord and went to Nineveh. Now Nineveh was a very large city; it took three days to go through it. Jonah began by going a day's journey into the city, proclaiming, "Forty more days and Nineveh will be overthrown." The Ninevites believed God. A fast was proclaimed, and all of them, from the greatest to the least, put on sackcloth. When Jonah's warning reached the king of Nineveh, he rose from his throne, took off his royal robes, covered himself with sackcloth and sat down in the dust. This is the proclamation he issued in Nineveh: "By the decree of the king and his nobles: Do not let people or animals, herds or flocks, taste anything; do not let them eat or drink. But let people and animals be covered with sackcloth. Let everyone call urgently on God. Let them give up their evil ways and their violence. Who knows? God may yet relent and with compassion turn from his fierce anger so that we will not perish." When God saw what they did and how they turned from their evil ways, he relented and did not bring on them the destruction he had threatened (Jonah 1: 1-2, 3-10). Jonah's Anger at the Lord's Compassion Jonah 4:1-10 "But to Jonah this seemed very wrong, and he became angry. He prayed to the Lord, "Isn't this what I said, Lord, when I was still at home? That is what I tried to forestall by 43 fleeing to Tarshish. I knew that you are a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger and abounding in love, a God who relents from sending calamity. Now, Lord, take away my life, for it is better for me to die than to live." But the Lord replied, "Is it right for you to be angry?" Jonah had gone out and sat down at a place east of the city. There he made himself a shelter, sat in its shade and waited to see what would happen to the city. Then the Lord God provided a leafy plant[a]and made it grow up over Jonah to give shade for his head to ease his discomfort, and Jonah was very happy about the plant. But at dawn the next day God provided a worm, which chewed the plant so that it withered. When the sun rose, God provided a scorching east wind, and the sun blazed on Jonah's head so that he grew faint. He wanted to die, and said, "It would be better for me to die than to live." But God said to Jonah, "Is it right for you to be angry about the plant?" "It is," he said. "And I'm so angry I wish I were dead." But the Lord said, ''You have been concerned about this plant, though you did not tend it or make it grow. It sprang up overnight and died overnight. 11 And should I not have concern for the great city of Nineveh, in which there are more than a hundred and twenty thousand people who cannot tell their right hand from their left-and also many animals?" (Jonah 4: 1-10). Moses: The Matter of Anger, A Moment of Rage Numbers 20:1-13 "In the first month the whole Israelite community arrived at the Desert of Zin, and they stayed at Kadesh. There Miriam died and was buried. Now there was no water for the community, and the people gathered in opposition to Moses and Aaron. They quarreled with 44 Moses and said, "If only we had died when our brothers fell dead before the Lord! Why did you bring the Lord's community into this desert, that we and our livestock should die here? Why did you bring us up out of Egypt to this terrible place? It has no grain or figs, grapevines or pomegranates. And there is no water to drink!" Moses and Aaron went from the assembly to the entrance to the Tent of Meeting and fell facedown, and the glory of the Lord appeared to them. The Lord said to Moses, "Take the staff, and you and your brother Aaron gather the assembly together. Speak to that rock before their eyes and it will pour out its water. You will bring water out of the rock for the community so they and their livestock can drink. " So Moses took the staff from the Lord's presence, just as he commanded him. He and Aaron gathered the assembly together in front of the rock and Moses said to them, "Listen, you rebels, must we bring you water out of this rock?" Then Moses raised his arm and struck the rock twice with his staff. Water gushed out, and the community and their livestock drank. But the Lord said to Moses and Aaron, "Because you did not trust in me enough to honor me as holy in the sight of the Israelites, you will not bring this community into the land I give them." These were the waters of Meribah, where the Israelites quarreled with the Lord and where he showed himself holy among them (Numbers 20:1-13). Acts of Violence in Our Society Are Not Rare We hear of acts of rage almost every day in the news. Someone would not stop texting in a movie theater and rage got the best of a retired policeman and he shot the man. A man shot 10 rounds into a car full of boys at a gas station because their music was too loud. A pastor's wife was killed by her husband. A 26 year old woman started arguing with her husband of two years 45 and ended up stabbing him to death. Many people are living with life-long consequences for the choices they made in a moment ofpassion or foolishness. In an act of intense anger Moses lashed out at a rock. It seemed to be an insignificant and harmless act. God dealt with Moses on this issue. Because he disobeyed God and acted out in a rage, Moses was not able to enter the Promised Land. How God deals with this situation will help us know how God may handle us when we behave in a similar manner. We are all subject to make sudden choices that we regret the rest of our lives (Poovey, 2015). There are five levels of intensity in the emotion anger. The first level of anger is irritation. This is a feeling of uneasiness that is brought about by an unpleasant disturbance. Irritation is a feeling of being annoyed or distressed. It causes resentment. ' The second level of anger is indignation. Indignation is a reaction to something that is perceived to be unreasonable or 46  unfair. This is typified as righteous anger or outrage. The third level of anger is wrath. When anger reaches this level, it must be expressed in some way. Wrath is belligerence aroused by a real or supposed wrong. This is intense anger. Wrath comes with a strong desire to avenge or defend oneself. The fourth level of anger is fury. Fury is usually manifested in acts of violence that are accompanied by a loss of control. Fury is defined as a state of violent mental agitation, being wild or turbulent. The fifth level of anger is rage. Rage is the most hostile and dangerous stage. Rage can overcome people with explosive acts of brutality that are devoid of any conscious awareness of their violent outburst. These levels of anger demonstrate the need for self-control. Anyone who experiences this uncontrolled escalation of anger describes a lack of self-control. Changes in self-control are very complicated without a life changing relationship with Jesus Christ. Unbelievers lack 47 what believers have. The Holy Spirit has been given to us to regulate our Christian life. His power can bring harmful feelings of anger under control. The Bible describes the characteristics of the believer as the Fruit of the Spirit. The Holy Spirit working within us creates these characteristics. Unfortunately, believers do not always draw upon the restraining power of God. Sometimes Christians are out of control. This is not only seen in relation to anger. It is also demonstrated in lifestyles that are contrary to the nature of Christ. Look at the history of Moses' anger. It is said the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. Moses had a history of getting angry. Moses' anger was seen in his early adult years in Egypt. Moses became indignant when he witnessed an Egyptian beating a fellow Hebrew. His rage led to an act of fury. The dead Egyptian resulted in Moses fleeing for his life (Exodus 2:11-15; Acts 7:23-29). The next recorded outbreak occurs forty years later. Moses announced the coming of the tenth plague on all the Egyptians' firstborns. The Bible says: "He went out from Pharaoh in hot anger" (Exodus 11 :8). He was furious that Pharaoh would not let the Israelites leave. God had told him how stubborn Pharaoh would be. Moses was not emotionally prepared to deal with Pharaoh's stubbornness. The third expression of Moses anger is seen several months following this event. Moses had just spent some extra-ordinary time in the presence of God. He was descending Mount Sinai with the two tablets that had been inscribed by the finger of God. He could not understand the unrighteousness of the Israelites. The people were perversely dancing around an idolatrous golden cal£ "The sight filled Moses with righteous indignation" (Exodus 32: 15-19). 48  What Was Wrong Was The Way Moses Chose to Express His Anger? When Moses approached the camp and saw the calf and the dancing, his anger burned and he threw the tablets out of his hands, breaking them to pieces at the foot of the mountain. And he took the calf they had made and burned it in the fire; then he ground it to powder, scattered it on the water and made the Israelites drink it (Exodus 32: 19 - 20). What Did God Require Moses to Do After This? God told Moses to write down the words of the covenant (Ten Commandments) on the tablets of stone. Now, look at this latest example ofMoses's anger, Numbers 20: 1-13. This is Moses' last recorded eruption of temper. He has been Israel's leader for about forty years. They have been on a constant journey throughout the region. Much of the time the Israelites have been complaining. Their complaining was a lack of faith and an act of disobedience to God. As a result, the people were dying off in the wilderness. There are very few exceptions. Joshua, Caleb, and Moses were among the few who had escaped this divine judgment. Finally, they arrive at "the wilderness ofZin," just south of the Promised Land (Number 20:1). The conditions were similar to what they had found on previous occasions. The people found no food or water to drink (Exodus 34:27-28). 49  Numbers 20:3 - 5 The people contended with Moses, saying, "If only we had died when our brothers died before the Lord! Why have you brought up the Lord's community into this wilderness? So that we and our cattle should die here? Why have you brought us up from Egypt only to bring us to this dreadful place? It is no place for grain, or figs, or vines, or pomegranates; nor is there any water to drink!" Their complaining sent Moses and Aaron to the Lord in prayer. Moses had emptied his emotional bucket. He was fed up with those people. All they could do was complain. He was carrying the frustration and scars from his past. Deep and unresolved anger and other emotions can leave us vulnerable to impulsive choices. The problem is not our past. The problem is our failure to bring our past to God for perspective and healing. So, here Moses is dealing with those same rebellious people one more time. God could never do enough for them to be satisfied and trust Him. God gave them a specific and grace- filled answer. Numbers 20:8 "Take the rod; you and your brother Aaron gather the congregation together. Speak to the rock before their eyes, and it will yield its water; thus you shall bring water for them out of the rock, and give drink to the congregation and their animals." God's directions were clear. Moses' actions were to bring glory to God. The last time Moses was in this position, God told 50 him to smite the rock. When he did that, the rock gushed out water that satisfied the need. Now, Moses was to give honor to God by speaking to the rock. Moses was indignant. When people are angry and out of control it is difficult to act reasonably. Moses' anger was out of control. He gathered the assembly around the designated rock where God was going to demonstrate His grace. Listen to what he said. Numbers 20:10-11 He and Aaron gathered the assembly together in front of the rock and Moses said to them, "Listen, you rebels, must we bring you water out of this rock?" Then Moses raised his arm and struck the rock twice with his staff. Water gushed out, and the community and their livestock drank. God graciously by-passed Moses' disobedience and purposefully demonstrated grace. The miracle was intended to point to the power of God. The miracle was designed to honor God as holy. When Moses disobeyed God, there were consequences. We should find and root out things in our lives that have the potential to keep us from obeying and fearing the Lord. Moses' anger caused him to act irrationally. In a rage of anger he struck the rock twice. Out of control emotions bring unwanted results to our lives. This was the last time God would allow Moses to fail. The consequences of his actions were painful. Since Moses did this, God would not allow him to lead the Hebrews into the Promised Land. God was willing to forgive Moses, but the consequences were still painful to bear. Numbers 20:12 But the Lord said to Moses and Aaron, "Because you did not trust in me enough to honor me as holy in the sight of the Israelites, you will not bring this community into the land I 51 give them. " Living Life Under Control Much of our society is out of control. We see evidences of this all around. God does not want His people to be like that. "Listed among the fruit of the Holy Spirit is self-control," Galatians 5:22-23. The God-controlled life will manifest emotions and actions that are under control. The remedy for the condition of the world is found in the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives. The Church must exemplify a life of control. The answer for the out of control attitudes of our world is God working in us. We must accurately reflect the influence of the Holy Spirit in our lives. Philippians 2:15 "That you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world" (Anderson, 2014). Martha's Story: At the Home of Martha and Mary As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!" "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are 52 worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed-or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her'' (Luke 10:38-42). There are many Bible characters that we know much about. Such people are the subject of frequent studies and may even have whole books or chapters of books devoted to them and the lessons we can learn from them. There are other people mentioned in the Bible about whom we know very little. These people may only be mentioned in passing or are found in only one or two places in the Bible. Often these people are overlooked, yet they appear in our Bibles for a reason. John 20:30-31 tells us that Jesus did many things that were not recorded in the Bible. The things that were recorded are to strengthen our faith. Second Timothy 3:16-17 tells us that everything in the Bible is from God and is for our learning. With this in mind, there can be no doubt that these little known, "forgotten" men and women of the Bible can teach us valuable lessons today. Most people who have any knowledge of the Bible at all know of King David. Those who know of David probably also know pf his wife Bathsheba. Fewer possibly remember his first wife Michal and fewer still might recall his wife Abigail. Even though Abigail's short story is found only in Chapter 25 of 1 Samuel, there is much that can be learned from this amazing woman. When we first read of Abigail, David is having a difficult time. King Saul, due to his disobedience to God, was told he would be the first and last from his family to rule on the throne. God promised to give the kingdom to another; the prophet Samuel anointed David as the next king over Israel. Saul, fueled by his great jealousy of David, set out to kill his 53 successor. To escape the wrath of King Saul, David fled and wandered the country with about six hundred loyal soldiers. During his travels, David stayed for a time near Mount Carmel ( 1 Samuel 25:1-2) where he defended the shepherds ofNabal against enemies and animals. Later David sent ten of his men to Nabal and asked for provisions for his men. Nabal scorned the messengers and David, and gave nothing. In anger, David readied four hundred of his soldiers for battle and marched toward Nabal. His intent was to slaughter all males ofNabal's house, young and old alike. It is at this moment in time that Abigail is introduced. While Nabal is described as "churlish and evil in his doings," his wife Abigail is described as "woman of good understanding, and of a beautiful countenance" (I Samuel 25:3). Through her servants, Abigail heard of the rude and inhospitable actions of her husband. This wise woman realized the danger she and her household were in and set about to appease David. Beginning in verse 18 of I Samuel Chapter 25, we read of Abigail's actions. She prepared a supply of provisions over and above what David had requested and went out to meet him. Once she met David on the road, Abigail immediately began her appeal. First, she humbly asked to speak to him. Abigail recognized the greatness of David and his future position as king. Even though she had more material possessions than David did at the time, she placed herself in a position to offer him respect and humility. She also accepted responsibility for the actions of her husband. "But I thine handmaid saw not the young men of my lord, whom thou didst send" (1 Samuel 25:25). Even though she was not directly responsible for the turning away of David's men, she accepted the responsibility since it was one of her household that rejected them. In a time when very few accept responsibility for anything, Abigail is a fine example of a woman who made herself accountable for the things in 54 her home. She is also a wonderful example of the humility we as Christians are to demonstrate in our own lives (Matthew 18:4; 23:12; James 4:10). Next, Abigail appealed to David's love of God and righteousness. She pointed out that Nabal was foolish and it was beneath David to respond so harshly to the offense at Nabal's hand. Abigail continued by pointing out that if David were to carry out his plan, he would be taking the responsibility of vengeance away from God and putting it on himself (Romans 12: 19). This wise woman also urged David to consider how he would feel later. After the heat of the moment passed, she knew David would feel guilty ifhe murdered Nabal and his household for the inhospitable actions (1 Samuel 25:31). As future king oflsrael and a man after God's own heart (Acts 13:22), David would be happier ifhe were guilt free in this matter. We also need to remember to let God avenge the wrongs done to us and be free of the guilt of revenge. In the end, Abigail's words and actions turned the wrath of David. Like the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31, Abigail used her mouth for wisdom and kindness. Abigail demonstrated with her words the truth of Proverbs 15: 1, "A soft answer tumeth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger." Abigail used sound arguments and soft words to persuade David not to sin against God and his fellow man. It is interesting that Abigail not once pleaded with David for her own interests. If David had continued with his plan, Abigail would have been left without a husband and a means of support. Yet she never mentioned this in her reasoning. Every indication from the text is that life with Nabal was very unpleasant. David's plan to kill Nabal would have freed Abigail from the unpleasantness of her marriage. Not even this possibility kept this godly woman from doing 55