Cycle 12 - Video 2 - Smarter Than BPD Quiz

Negative Core Beliefs and Schemas: How They Form and Impact Our Lives

• Negative core beliefs are beliefs about ourselves, others, and the world that become embedded in us, usually when we're young.
• Our brains form around our environment, and we learn how to survive and stay safe, even if it means not setting us up for the most healthy, balanced adult we could be.
• Shame is an extreme example of negative core beliefs, and it can be healthy or toxic.
• When we are being abused or threatened by the person in our life that's supposed to protect us, shame is the only emotion that's powerful enough to disrupt proximity seeking.
• Healthy shame is feeling bad about something we did wrong, while toxic shame is feeling that we are bad and wrong as a person.
• Negative core beliefs can be damaging because we internalize ideas that we are bad, wrong, and don't deserve help.
• Core beliefs can impact every decision we make, and they can look like "I can't succeed in anything" or "I am not worth it."
• Negative core beliefs can be imprinted by constantly being ridiculed, not given support, undiagnosed disabilities, or families that are committed to excellence.
• Negative core beliefs are usually very simple, such as "I'm not good enough" or "I will fail."
• The schema that negative core beliefs create can manifest in complicated ways that have tentacles that travel far into our adult lives.
• We can be wounded in childhood by things that society and many people would think are beneficial or esteeming.
• Negative core beliefs can create inherent vulnerability, which we have to deal with later on in life.

The Impact of Negative Core Beliefs on Adult Behaviors and Coping Strategies

• Negative core belief schemas are often embedded in us in early life and influence our decisions and behaviors as adults.
• These beliefs are usually unconscious and can lead to stress when life doesn't work out as we want it to.
• Coping strategies learned from family of origin can include avoidance, anger and rage, alcohol and drug use, intensity cycles, and overshopping.
• Poor boundary systems can reinforce negative core beliefs and lead to self-esteem failure when receiving constructive feedback.
• Coping mechanisms and strategies intensify as stress increases, leading to more severe problems like substance use disorders, gambling issues, affairs, and family problems.
• The first problem (negative core beliefs) started out as a solution to managing pain, but the coping strategies used to manage it can lead to additional problems.
• Good treatment for these issues involves addressing both the negative core beliefs and coping strategies.
• Treatment should focus on making significant shifts and improvements rather than just managing the issues.
• Parents often pass down coping strategies and may not have the tools or coping skills to teach their children.
• Avoidance, anger and rage, and overshopping are coping strategies that take us away from what's dysfunctional rather than dealing with it.
• Intensity cycles can involve addiction to work, relationships outside of marriage or family, or overshopping.
• Poor boundary systems can lead to feeling offended, violated, or like things aren't fair, which reinforces negative core beliefs.