Conflict Management Lecture Notes PDF

Level 1 - Semester 1 PCM LECTURE (12) CONFLICT MANAGEMENT DR ZIAD MAHANA  PCM LECTURE - 3 0 ConfliCt ManageMent...

Level 1 - Semester 1 PCM LECTURE (12) CONFLICT MANAGEMENT DR ZIAD MAHANA  PCM LECTURE - 3 0 ConfliCt ManageMent Definition D EFINITION OF C ONFLICT A DISAGREEMENT  Through which the parties involved perceive a threat to their needs, interests or concerns.  Within this simple definition there are several important understandings that emerge: ① Disagreement. ② Parties involved. ③ Perceived threat. ❶  Generally, we are aware there is some level of difference in the positions of the two (or more) parties involved in the conflict. True disagreement (not perceived) If we can understand the true areas of disagreement ▼ Will help us solve the right problems + Manage the true needs of the parties. Dr. Ziad Mahana 1  PCM LECTURE - 12 ❷  There are often disparities in our sense of who is involved in the conflict.  For example: ▪ On many occasions, people who are seen as part of the social system (e.g., work team, family, company) are influenced to participate in the dispute, whether they would personally define the situation in that way or not. ❸ Types of threat ✘ PEOPLE RESPOND TO PERCEIVED THREAT RATHER THAN TRUE THREAT ✘ The perceived threat The true threat facing them If we can work to: While perception doesn't become reality ① Understand the true threat (issues) ▼ ② Develop strategies (solutions) that IMPACT People's behaviors, feelings and ongoing manage it (agreement). responses become modified by that ▼ evolving sense of the threat they confront. We are acting constructively to manage the conflict. ConfliCt Resolution skills Aim  Managing & Resolving Conflict in a Positive Way. Why to learn these skills?  Learning to deal with them in a healthy way is crucial as… ① Relationship conflicts are inevitable: two people can’t be expected to agree on everything at all times. ② Conflict is a normal & even healthy part of relationships. IF IT IS WELL MANAGED Dr. Ziad Mahana 2  PCM LECTURE - 12 4 key conflict resolution skills  The ability to successfully manage & resolve conflict depends on 4 key skills: ❶ Conflict resolution skill 1: Quickly relieve stress ❷ Conflict resolution skill 2: Recognize and manage your emotions. ❸ Conflict resolution skill 3: Improve your nonverbal communication skills ❹ Conflict resolution skill 4: Use humor and play to deal with challenges Conflict resolution skill 1 Quickly relieve stress “The capacity to remain relaxed & focused in tense situations is a vital aspect of conflict resolution” ❖ If you don’t know how to stay centered & in control of yourself: ▪ You may become emotionally overwhelmed in challenging situations. ❖ How can you relieve stress? ▪ Each person responds differently to sensory input, so you need to find things that are soothing to you. Conflict resolution skill 2 Recognize & manage your emotions “Emotional awareness is the key to understanding yourself & others” o If you don’t know how you feel or why you feel that way NOT HAVING ▪ You won’t be able to communicate effectively or smooth over THIS SKILL disagreements. ① Don’t ignore or try to sedate strong emotions HOW TO ▪ Although knowing your own feelings may seem simple many people RECOGNIZE & ignore or try to sedate strong emotions Like anger, sadness, and fear. HANDLE YOUR EMOTION ② Connect to these feelings ▪ Your ability to handle conflict depends on it. Dr. Ziad Mahana 3  PCM LECTURE - 12 Conflict resolution skill 3 Improve your nonverbal communication skills “The most important information exchanged during conflicts & arguments is often communicated non-verbally” Conflict resolution skill 4 Use humor & play to deal with challenges ❖ Importance of this skill: By communicating in a playful or humorous way… ① You can avoid many confrontations. ② You can resolve arguments & disagreements. ③ Help you say things that might otherwise be difficult to express without creating a flap. ‫ولكن برشط‬ ❖ It’s important that you laugh with the other person, not at them. tips for managing & resolving conflict ① Make the relationship your priority. ⑥ Learning how to listen. ② Focus on the present. ⑦ Have patience. ③ Pick your battles. ⑧ Be impartial. ④ Be willing to forgive. ⑨ Be open to discussion (Open communication). ⑤ Know when to let something go. ⑩ Reference to the institutional values. ❶  Maintaining & strengthening the relationship✔ should always be your first priority & not winning the argument✘  Be respectful of the other person & his or her viewpoint /differences. ❷ ✘ Don’t look to the past & assigning blame why? ▪ If you’re holding on to old hurts & resentments → your ability to see the reality of the current situation will be impaired. ✔ Focus on what you can do in the here-and-now to solve the problem. Dr. Ziad Mahana 4  PCM LECTURE - 12 ❸  Conflicts can be DRAINING ▪ So it’s important to consider whether the issue is really worthy of your time & energy. ❹  Resolving conflict is IMPOSSIBLE if you’re unwilling or unable to forgive. ❺  If you can’t come to an agreement → Agree to disagree.  It takes 2 people to keep an argument going.  If a conflict is going nowhere, you can choose to disengage & move on. ❻ Tips for being a better listener ❶ Listen to the reasons the other person gives for being upset. ❷ Make sure you understand what the other person is telling you *from his or her point of view* ❸ Repeat the other person’s words & ask if you have understood correctly. ❹ Ask if anything remains unspoken, giving the person time to think before answering. ❺ Resist the temptation to pose your own point of view…  Until ▪ The other person has said everything he or she wants to say. ▪ & feels that you have listened to & understood his or her message. Dr. Ziad Mahana 5  PCM LECTURE - 12 emotional intelligenCe 5 Skills of Emotional Intelligence Skill 1 Quick Stress Relief Together, the 5 skills of emotional Skill 2 Emotional Awareness intelligence help you… Skill 3 Nonverbal Communication ① Build strong relationships. Skill 4 Playful Communication ② Overcome challenges. ③ Succeed at work & in life. Skill 5 Conflict Resolution ConfliCt Resolution strategies The ability to resolve conflicts positively & with confidence is the 5th of 5 essential emotional intelligence skills. 2 steps you should consider ❶ Set boundaries: Before diving head-first into the conflict discussion, establish boundaries upfront for all parties to follow.  These might include the following: ▪ Reminding everyone that the conflict is not personal. ▪ Asking everyone to keep the discussion confidential. ▪ Trusting everyone to manage their emotions & not make outburst, hurtful remarks, or make untrue statements. ❷ Have a third-party weigh-in.  In some cases, the conflict may ▪ Simply be too emotional to address yourself. ▪ Or you are afraid of retaliation, discrimination.  it may help to have a third-party weigh in to address, or at least mediate, the conflict on your behalf. Dr. Ziad Mahana 6  PCM LECTURE - 12  Describes 5 strategies (Styles) for addressing conflict: - No strategy is right or wrong - But there’s an appropriate time to use each one  The five strategies lie on 2 axes: ❶ ASSERTIVE AXIS ❷ COOPERATIVE AXIS Assertiveness Cooperative EACH OF THE STRATEGIES RANGES BETWEEN & & Unassertiveness Uncooperative Dr. Ziad Mahana 7  PCM LECTURE - 12 Dr. Ziad Mahana 8  PCM LECTURE - 13 ❶ COMPETING STYLE ❷ ACCOMMODATING OR SMOOTHING Assertive & Uncooperative Unassertive & Cooperative TYPE OF INDIVIDUALS Both are the opposite of each other  An intense approach to resolving conflicts  Those using a this style: ▪ Which one's own needs are advocated over the needs of ▪ Yield their needs to those of others, trying to be others. diplomatic. ▪ They tend to allow the needs of the group to overwhelm  It relies on: their own. ① An aggressive style of communication. ▪ Their needs may not ever be stated. ② Low regard for future relationships. CHARACTERS As preserving the relationship is seen as most important ③ The exercise of coercive power.  Those using a this style: ▪ Tend to seek control over a discussion. ▪ Fear that loss of such control will result in solutions that fail to meet their needs. Dr. Ziad Mahana 9  PCM LECTURE - 13 ❹ COLLABORATING ❸ AVOIDING Often called “win-win problem-solving” Unassertive And Uncooperative in Mitigating Conflict Assertive & Cooperative TYPE OF INDIVIDUALS Both are the opposite of each other  It is the pooling of individual needs & goals toward a common goal.  This style requires assertive communication & cooperation ▪ To achieve a better solution than either individual could CHARACTERS ---- have achieved alone.  It offers the chance for Consensus & the integration of needs + It brings new time, energy, and ideas. ▪ To resolve the dispute meaningfully ① Small annoyances THIS keeping a relationship intact STRATEGY IS ② One-off mistakes + BEST FOR Find a solution that works for everyone ③ Issues that would otherwise be worsened by addressing them. Dr. Ziad Mahana 10  PCM LECTURE - 13 ❺ COMPROMISING TYPE OF Is intermediate in both assertiveness & cooperativeness INDIVIDUALS  An approach is generally not satisfying. CHARACTERS  We each remain shaped by our individual perceptions of our needs & don't necessarily understand the other side very well.  We often retain a lack of trust & avoid risk-taking involved in more collaborative behaviors THE HEART OF DIALOGUE TALK  Start by understanding each style & its consequences, we may normalize the results of our behaviors in various situations.  This is to indicate the expected consequences of each approach. Dr. Ziad Mahana 11