Lecture 1 - Self-in-Relation: The Instinct to Attach

Self-in-Relation The Instinct to Attach COUN 420 Relationship Counselling Lecture 1 An reflection exercise What will you do, when you are frustrated, feeling not capable to complete a task?  Human Beings Are Social Animals...

Self-in-Relation The Instinct to Attach COUN 420 Relationship Counselling Lecture 1 An reflection exercise What will you do, when you are frustrated, feeling not capable to complete a task?  Human Beings Are Social Animals We live in a complex web of interpersonal bonds and social associations We value our relationships and are happiest and most satisfied when we maintain positive social ties This appears to be ‘programmed’ into our basic nature and our behavior The Evolutionary Context of Attachment –Group Living The survival of early humans depended on working together. They: 1. Cooperated for food gathering and defense 2. Built social alliances 3. Attractedmates and formed long- term pair bonds 4. Reared young  Natural Selection 物競天擇，適者生存 Does not imply objective superiority Means well-suited, well-adapted, able to pass on genetic information to next generation Whoever is able to survive and reproduce provides the genetic foundation for future generations Our current traits and characteristics are clues to the selection processes of our ancestors The need to belonging “wired” into us The strength of our innate needs for social affiliation and social belonging suggests that these traits were critical to survival (i.e., natural selection) Recall your grouping experience, for example, a task group for completing presentation in a class. What are the characteristics of your own behaviour in the group forming, working, dissolving and termination processes. The need to belonging “wired” into us In research studies, people tend to: 1. Form bonds quickly and easily 2. Stay loyal and show allegiance to group members 3. Show preference for group members 4. Demonstrate reluctance to dissolve social bonds (Baumeister et al., 2008) The Need for Connection Social attachments affect: Cognition (we think more about our close relationships) Affect and Emotion (our strongest positive and negative emotions are usually linked to belongingness issues) Being accepted: happy, satisfaction, elation Being rejected: jealousy, depress, loneliness As a conclusion... Our Social Nature Seems To Be The Essence of What Makes Us Human. As a side evidence, "love" (in whatever defi nition) is the most popular theme in pop-songs and movies John Bowlby (1907 – 1990) Creator of Attachment Theory Attachment Theory 1. Clinical observations of disrupted parent- child relationships 2. Ethological research – Imprinting of baby ducks 3. Psychological research on affectional response in monkeys. Harlow's Monkey Experiment: Exploring Attac hment and Maternal Care Born “Ready to Connect” -The Attachment System ATTACHMENT Survival and wellbeing of human infants are largely dependent on establishing a close continuous relationship with one or a few individuals who can provide consistent physical and psychological protection and nurturance. The innate and adaptive propensity of human beings to make strong affectional bonds to particular others. Attachment Behaviors - Instinctive, Goal-Directed Responses that Promote Physical Proximity to Primary Caregivers Primary caregivers are also called the Attachment Figure Caregivin g Instinct Parents of crying babies generally experience a strong urge to behave in ways that reduce infants’ distress. Cradling Feeding Stroking Soothing the infant Physical contact designed to convey safety, security and comfort  Responsivene ss Responsiveness – the caregiver’s ability to monitor, recognize and react to infant cues Promptly (within a brief window of time following the child’s behavior) Contingently (depending conceptually on the child behavior) Appropriately (in a positive and meaningful way)  The Importance of Responsiveness ASSOCIATED WITH A NUMBER OF BENEFICIAL OUTCOMES 1. Social competence 2. Language skill and communicative competence 3. Cognitive and intellectual function DYADIC VERBAL RECIPROCITY (Beckwith and Rodning, 1996) The more verbally responsive a mother was to her child’s vocalizations during interaction, the higher her child subsequently scored on measures of social competence and expressive and receptive language skill  The Dangers of Non- Responsiveness Non-responsiveness tends to produce negative physical and mental health outcomes deficits in: physical growth speech and language acquisition cognitive and intellectual functioning socio-emotional development Risky Family Environment leading to non-responsiveness – a family situation characterized by: 1. overt conflict (manifested in recurrent episodes of anger and aggression) 2. deficient nurturing (cold and unsupportive interactions that are neglectful of the child’s needs) Normative development of child attachment 0 – 3 months: Infants do not show strong preferences for being with any single caregiver. 3 – 7 months: Infants begin to distinguish their daily caregivers from strangers. They begin to prefer certain people over others. 7 months to 3 years: Children start taking a more active role in seeking out their caregivers. Children behaviours are characterized with proximity maintenance (staying near to attachment figure), safe haven (turning to the attachment figure for comfort and support) and secure base (using the attachment figure as a foundation from which to engage in non-attachment behaviours, such as exploration and play). They also develop their internal working model. > age 3 : Given expanding language skills and understanding others, children begin to see the world from the view of the attachment figures. Other Aspects of Attachment Instinct Second-order relational information -the ‘rules’ of faces: contour, shape, movement, and spatial relations of facial features (distance between eyes, etc. 7 months of age -- discriminate facial expressions of happiness from expression of surprise, sadness, fear and anger [empathic accuracy]; and Distinguish the intensities of the same expression e.g. smiling STILL FACE EFFECT - reductions in visual attention, smiling, positive affective displays, increases in crying and negative affect https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bNq6zEd09mo Other Aspects of Attachment Instinct FACE PERCEPTUAL SYSTEM mediated by subcortical structures causes newborns (less than 40 minutes) to orient toward any stimulus that is sufficiently ‘face-like’ Individual differences in attachment Infants and young children can gauge whether or not their caregivers are sensitive, responsive and attentive to their needs. Strange situation, Ainsworth (1970), identified 3 primary attachment patterns. Ep 1: brief introduction to lab room Ep 2: mother and child alone Ep 3: Stranger in room with mother and child Ep 4: Child alone with stranger Ep 5: Stranger leaves, mother returns Ep 6: child left alone in room Ep 7: stranger re-enters room Ep 8: joined by mother (stranger, mother, child) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRejV6f-Y3c Strange Situation Procedure (Ainsworth, 1970) Proximity seeking: Efforts to gain or regain contact with mother (e.g., direct approach) Contact maintenance – efforts to maintain self- initiated physical contact with the mother (e.g., gazing, clinging) Avoidance – active avoidance of proximity to or interaction with mother Resistance – negative behavior oft. Angry, in response to mother’s contact attempts Three General Attachment Styles Three general patterns typically displayed by children 1. Secure high proximity-seeking, high contact maintaining, little resistance or avoidance. Grounded in history of intimate parent-child relationship 2. Insecure - resistant/anxious-ambivalent Very distressed when caregiver leaves the room during SS, but angrily resist her efforts to provide comfort on returning. Grounded in history of inconsistent, chaotic, hit-or- miss caregiving. Three General Attachment Styles 3. Insecure - avoidant / anxious-avoidant Low levels of proximity-seeking. Low levels of contact- maintenance. High levels of active avoidance. Rooted in history of rejection and/or emotional unavailability from the caregiver, particularly during times of need. Attachment Process Model (Mikulincer and Shaver, 2003) Attachment Styles: Internal Working Models the child develops : a set of internalized expectations and beliefs about what other people are like internalized views of himself or herself as valued and self- reliant, or unworthy and incompetent. INTERNAL WORKING MODELS influence subsequent relationship outcomes  Beware of Reductionism !!! SCIENCE IS DIFFERENT FROM THERAPY. THEORY IS DIFFERENT FROM THERAPY. We Strive to be Evidence-Based, however: A scientist and a therapist have different goals and methods. There should be interchange between them, but neither is suited to dictate the other. e.g., ideal conditions of laboratory (exclusive) vs. ideal conditions of therapy room (inclusive)