Personality Plus Ch 13

Temperaments and Personal Growth

• People often feel boxed in by their temperaments, fearing they are being categorized or judged. However, individuals already naturally create their own limitations and comfort zones.
• From birth, individuals are placed in various structures (cribs, baskets, etc.). This environment cultivates a sense of confinement.

Building Internal Walls

• Even in adulthood, individuals build invisible walls around themselves, as illustrated by the author's college roommate experience.
• Relationships are affected when individuals don't understand or recognize the personal structures they hold onto.
• Temperaments aren't about placing limits but about understanding the existing structure and creating options for growth. It reveals how boxes influence their interactions and choices.

Temperaments in Relationships (Marriage)

• Individuals bring their own "boxes" to a relationship, and marriages often fail to harmonize due to differing structures.
• Differing temperament styles create challenges in understanding and adapting between partners.
• The author recounts a personal experience where a wife's and husband's differing temperament styles created mismatched expectations during the honeymoon. A practical example is given.

Recognizing and Addressing Weaknesses

• Self-improvement begins with recognizing and admitting weaknesses. This honesty is essential for progress.
• Immature individuals shift blame, while mature individuals examine themselves. Personal improvement and healing are important aspects for growth.
• Childhood experiences (pain and rejection) are not to be blamed but understood to better comprehend behavior patterns. Introspection can inform the healing process.
• The concept of "Personality Anonymous" is presented; individuals admit their strengths and weaknesses related to their temperament and work to develop and improve.

Assessing Strengths and Weaknesses

• It's often that people with pessimistic temperaments (Perfect Melancholies and Peaceful Phlegmatics) have difficulty identifying their strengths.
• Conversely, those with more assertive or outgoing temperaments (Popular Sanguines and Powerful Cholerics) may avoid self-evaluation of weaknesses.
• Seeking honest opinions from others is crucial for personal growth. It is essential for encouraging constructive criticism.
• Critically evaluating and admitting weaknesses is vital for self-improvement.

Gaining Perspective and Cooperation

• Encouraging others to share honest opinions is often overlooked.
• People often build protective barriers to their behaviors in an effort to avoid being judged or rejected. Walls can hinder honest, productive communication.
• Asking for feedback and embracing constructive criticism is essential for personal progress.
• Building positive relationships with family members requires tact and understanding, as individuals adapt to change their behavior.
• The examples of Popular Sanguine, Perfect Melancholy, Powerful Choleric, and Peaceful Phlegmatic are provided to highlight the need for different strategies in asking for feedback depending on the temperament.

Personal Improvement Plan

• Creating a plan for personal improvement in human relationships is a necessity.
• Strategies for each temperament are provided for dealing with their weaknesses, including examples like biting one's tongue (for Sanguines) and forcing oneself to listen (for Cholerics).

Encouraging Honest Feedback

• Encouraging honest feedback is essential for overcoming personal limitations and reaching one's full potential.

Explore how your temperament influences personal growth and relationships. This quiz delves into the structures individuals create around themselves and how they affect interactions and choices in marriages. Understand the concept of personal boxes and learn how to break free for healthier connections.