Leadership Session 7: Active Listening Skills

SKEMA Business School Leadership: Session 7

• Session 7 is part of the Leadership curriculum at SKEMA Business School
• The session focuses on active listening and motivation skills, including paraphrasing, clarifying, reflecting, summarizing and other important concepts
• Session 6 covered Active Listening and Motivation Skills
• Session six covered
  • Paraphrasing
  • Clarifying
  • Reflecting
  • Summarizing
  • Road Blocks to Good Listening
  • Tips for Active Listening
  • "Feeling words"
  • Hamburger Method for giving good feedback
  • Observer feedback forms
  • Listening simulation
  • Motivation theories

Four Key Active Listening Components

• Listening for the whole message
• Being non-judgmental
• Being understanding and supportive
• Developing the desire to listen

Paraphrasing:

• Restate information using different words
• Express the meaning using simple words
• Tests understanding of the speaker's message
• Allows the speaker to focus on their own thoughts
• Encourages the speaker to continue speaking

Clarifying:

• Asking the speaker to explain aspects of their message
• Involves asking clarifying questions to ensure understanding

Clarifying: Why?

• Gives the speaker the opportunity to elaborate
• Allows the student to check the accuracy of their understanding

Clarifying Examples:

• "I'm not sure I quite understand; or do you mean that...?"
• "Can you say more about...?"
• "You have given me a lot of information, let me see if I've got it all..."

Reflecting:

• Relaying what the speaker said to show understanding of their feelings and emotions
• Deepens understanding of feelings and content
• Allows the speaker to see that the student understands their message and perceptions

###Reflecting Examples:

• "I get the sense that you might be feeling afraid about what might happen if..."
• "To me, it sounds like you are frustrated about what was said... but I'm wondering if you are also feeling a little hurt by it."

Summarizing:

• Identifying, connecting, and integrating key ideas and feelings expressed by the speaker
• Emphasizing empathy and mutual communication
• Helps the listener and speaker identify what is most important to the speaker

Summarizing examples:

• "Let me summarize what I heard so far..."
• "So, on the one hand... but on the other hand..."
• “I think I've heard several things that seem to be important to you..."

Tips for Active Listening (Do's):

• Listen more than you talk
• Let the speaker finish before you respond
• Ask open-ended questions
• Remain attentive to what's being said
• Be aware of your own biases
• Manage your own emotions
• Be attentive to ideas and problem-solving opportunities
• Give verbal and nonverbal messages that you are listening
• Listen for both feelings and content

Tips for Active Listening (Don'ts):

• Act bored
• Dominate the conversation
• Interrupt
• Finish the speaker's sentences
• Jump to conclusions
• Respond with blaming or accusatory language
• Become argumentative
• Demonstrate impatience or multitask
• Mentally compose your next responses
• Listen with biases or shut out new ideas

Most Important Part of Active Listening:

• Pacing or mirroring the feelings of the person being listened to
• If a person is sad, and you aren't, consider how they might perceive that
• Understanding feelings builds trust

Feeling Words:

• A list of feeling words is provided, split by category.

Roadblocks to Good Listening:

• Fixing
  • Ordering
  • Suggesting
  • Advising
  • Diagnosing
• Evaluating
  • Threatening
  • Praising
  • Condemning
  • Taking sides
  • Giving opinions
• Interrupting
  • Interjecting comments
  • Not allowing speaker's own pace
  • Tuning out
  • Creating/responding to distractions
  • Cross-examining
• Diverting
  • Reassuring
  • Changing the subject
  • Focusing on your own agenda

Giving Feedback (Hamburger Method):

• Soft: Mention a few positive things.
• Sauce: Smooth transition to constructive feedback. Replace "but" and "however" with "and."
• Hard: Constructive feedback.
• Soft: Mention one or two more positive aspects.

Active Listening Simulation:

• Students rotate through roles: Client, Active Listener, Observer
• Clients discuss a topic/challenge
• Active listeners practice active listening skills
• Observers evaluate Active Listener's performance

Motivation Theories to Increase Productivity:

• Herzberg's Two-Factor Theory: Distinguishes between hygiene factors (extrinsic, like salary) and motivators (intrinsic, like recognition).
• Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs: Outlines five levels of human needs (physiological, safety, love/belonging, esteem, self-actualization).
• Hawthorne Effect: Employees' productivity increased due to awareness of being observed, not necessarily from the changes themselves.
• Expectancy Theory: Motivation is a result of three components (expectancy, instrumentality, valence).
• Attribution Theory: Explains how individuals interpret and explain the causes of behavior. Includes dimensions of locus of control, stability, and controllability.