Understanding & Coping with Stress PDF

Understanding & Coping with Stress Imagine this happens to you: You’ve studied hard for a final exam but once you’re in class looking at the test, you realize you don’t know the material at all. What feelings or emotions are you having? What are you thinking? How does your body r...

Understanding & Coping with Stress Imagine this happens to you: You’ve studied hard for a final exam but once you’re in class looking at the test, you realize you don’t know the material at all. What feelings or emotions are you having? What are you thinking? How does your body react? Stress is a feeling of pressure around events, circumstances or situations. It’s a part of life. You can feel stress when facing a difficult situation. You can also feel stress when facing any kind of change in your life, even when you view the change as a positive one. Stress is normal. Everyone experiences it. But how you respond to and deal with stress can play a big part in your emotional health. One important skill for developing positive emotional health is being able to manage stress and cope with stressful situations. Humans experience change from the moment of birth until the moment of death. We’re constantly adjusting to events, changes and situations in life. A stressor is anything that causes stress. Some stressors are external—they come from the outside world. Examples of external stressors include: School assignments Pressure from friends to do something you don’t want to do Emergencies or difficult events Some stressors are internal—they come from inside yourself. Examples of internal stressors include: Wanting to do well at something Worrying about what other people Some major stressors or life changes people your age might experience at home, in school and with friends include: Death of a family member or friend Serious illness of a family member or friend Moving Parents’ divorce End of a friendship Failing a class  Graduating Getting or not getting into college Getting a job Some everyday stressors people your age might experience at home, in school and with friends include: Arguing with parents Not getting along with a sibling or dating partner Misunderstandings with friends Being late for school or another appointment Not being prepared for class Getting homework done Technology breaking down or not working when you need or want it Pressure to perform well at a sport or other activity Chores or other expected tasks Peer pressure Gossip or rumors Keeping up on social media Bullying Having too much to do Sometimes stress can be useful. It can motivate you to get things done or help you learn new skills. But it can also cause worry, upset or fear, or even make you sick. Stress can come from major events or changes in your life. Or it can come from daily hassles that build up over time. Many of the stressors are negative events or situations. But positive situations or events can also be stressful. For example, preparing for a vacation or trying out for a school play are positive events that can cause stress. Any situation with an uncertain outcome can be potentially stressful, even if it leads to something positive. Change is definitely part of life. Sometimes changes happen slowly or so quietly that you may not notice them at the time. Other changes can be sudden or dramatic. Major negative events or changes are the ones people usually think of as stressors, but all kinds of changes—even positive ones—can cause a degree of stress. In the same way, everyday stressors or daily hassles may seem small when taken individually, but when they occur throughout your day or continue to happen over time, they can also lead to significant amounts of stress. Understanding how your mind and body respond to all kinds of stress is another key to managing it. Some common emotions felt during stressful times include: Feeling anxious or worried  Feeling irritable or angry Feeling sad Feeling insecure or scared Feeling numb or depressed Trouble concentrating Thinking negative thoughts Putting yourself or someone else down) Some physical feelings felt response to stress commonly include: Faster heart rate Breathing faster Sweating Dry mouth Upset stomach The physical reactions and sensations that you listed are short-term responses to stress. They happen right away in response to the stressor. But, if stress isn’t managed, there are also many physical health problems that can occur in the long term or over time. When stress is constant or continual, a person can become physically ill. Long-term physical problems related to stress include digestion problems, stomach aches, constipation or diarrhea, high blood pressure, heart disease, cancer, stroke and skin problems such as acne. The immune system doesn’t function as well, so a person is more prone to colds, flu and other infections. In severe cases, a person’s organs can fail and death can result. Long-term stress can also lead to mental health problems, such as anxiety disorders, which cause a person to have ongoing feelings of worry, fear or panic that interfere with daily life, or depression, which is an ongoing feeling of sadness, despair or numbness that keeps a person from enjoying life. Ongoing stress can have serious consequences for both your emotional and physical health. This is why knowing how to manage stress is an important skill. Stress is not the same for everyone. The reaction to stress often depends on how the person views the situation or event. It can also be influenced by a person’s past experiences and skills in handling stress. Sometimes people react to stress by becoming angry or upset, or by blaming someone else for the situation. Or they may feel so overwhelmed that they avoid the stressful situation, pretend it isn’t happening, or even try to escape through alcohol or other drug use. These are negative or unhealthy ways to deal with stress that can wind up adding to the pressure the person is feeling and cause more problems over time. Sometimes stress might push or motivate people to take action to handle the situation that’s causing the stress, if it’s something over which they have some control. Sometimes people are able to keep a positive outlook and think of good things that could come from the situation. Getting more information, asking for help, doing something to relax, taking a break until you feel calmer, or approaching the problem one step at a time are all positive ways to respond to stress. Things you can do for Yourself to decrease stress include but are not limited to: ➔​ Make healthy choices. Doing something that’s healthy for your body or mind when you’re feeling stressed can help you feel better. Keeping your body healthy by eating nutritious foods, getting enough physical activity and avoiding tobacco, alcohol and other drugs can also lower your overall stress level or help keep stress under control. ➔​ Get support. Talking with a friend or a trusted adult can ease troubled feelings and help you figure out solutions. Positive social connections help people maintain their emotional health and experience less stress in their lives. ➔​ Understand your feelings. Writing, drawing or some other creative way of expressing what you feel can often help a person work through difficult feelings. Keeping a journal, writing a poem or song, painting a picture or making a collage are some ideas you could try. ➔​ Find ways to relax. You’ve learned about the effects of stress on the body. Doing things to slow your heart rate and breathing and relax tense muscles can help relieve the physical stress response. You can also find ways to relax or refocus your mind on something other than the stressful situation. ➔​ Keep a sense of humor. A sense of humor gives you the ability to laugh at a situation rather than at yourself or someone else. Sometimes tension can be eased when you can think of or say something lighthearted in a difficult situation. It’s always  important to consider the circumstances, however, because humor may not be appropriate in all stressful situations. ➔​ Take action when you can. If the stressful situation is one you have some control over, taking action—even if it’s just a small step—can help you feel more empowered and capable. And, remember, you always have control over your own choices, even if you can’t control the source of the stress. ➔​ Resolve or eliminate the source of stress. If you can figure out where the stress is coming from or what’s causing it, you may be able to take steps to resolve a situation or change how you respond to it. Identify the stressors in your life and see which ones you can avoid or deal with before they become too stressful. ➔​ Identify how to prevent stress in the future. This might mean learning how to manage your time, or thinking ahead about what needs to be accomplished to complete a project or a task to help keep you focused and organized. Stress Management Techniques Sometimes you can prevent or reduce the amount of stress in your life but not all stress can be prevented. You are going to learn and practice some techniques that will help you deal with stress when you’re experiencing it. These are some things you can do to help reduce the level of stress you experience or even prevent some stress from happening in the first place. You’re going to learn more about these 3 ways to help prevent or reduce stress. ​Physical Activity ​Time Management ​Talking About It Sometimes stress is unavoidable. Now you’re going to learn about and then practice some specific techniques you can use to help you manage stress when it occurs. Not all of these techniques will work for every person. As you practice, you can decide which ones work best for you. Then you can use them the next time you feel stressed. Too much stress can hurt your physical and emotional health. Finding ways to prevent or reduce stress and knowing some stress-management techniques can help you stay healthy. Expressing Emotions in Healthy Ways Many different feelings are part of the human experience. One of the characteristics of emotionally healthy people is that they can experience a wide range of emotions and express these emotions in healthy ways. It’s natural to feel happy when you accomplish a goal or have something positive happen in your life. It’s natural to feel sad when you lose something or someone you care about. It’s natural to feel angry or hurt if you feel you or people you love have been treated unfairly. Feeling afraid can be a clue that you’re in danger or need to be careful. Throughout your life, different events and situations will trigger different emotional responses. Whether you experience an emotion as pleasant or unpleasant, good or difficult, identifying those emotions through words can help you and others better understand your feelings. Feelings themselves aren’t good or bad, healthy or unhealthy. It’s how people choose to respond to and express their feelings that matters and plays a role in emotional health. Some feelings, such as happiness, excitement or gratitude, are easy for most people to experience. Other feelings, such as anger, fear or sadness, may be more difficult for many people to experience. Sometimes people label feelings as “good” or “bad,” but all of these different feelings are part of human experience. How do people express their emotions? What kinds of clues help you know what a person is feeling? Identify the feelings. This is the first step in expressing your feelings in healthy ways. You need to become aware of your feelings and know what they are so you can take the best steps to respond and express them to others. Find someone to talk to about how you feel. Remember that one trait of emotionally healthy people is that they ask for help when they need it. Sometimes all you need is someone to listen to how you feel. Talking about your feelings with someone you trust can help you understand why you’re having the feelings and figure out what to do to express them in a way that’s constructive and healthy. Be physically active. Moving your body and doing something active can help you work off your feelings. Take a walk, run, work out, jump  up and down, or do any physical activity you enjoy. You might also punch a pillow or other soft, safe object. Keep a journal. Writing about your feelings can help you understand and express them. You don’t have to show anyone what you write. You could also write a poem or song, create a dance, paint or draw a picture, or do any other creative action. Let yourself cry. Sometimes strong feelings can make you want to cry. Crying can help relieve the feelings, and most people feel better after they cry. Find a safe or private place, or be with a person you trust, and let yourself cry if you need to. Take a break and cool down. Sometimes you need to step away from the situation that’s causing the strong feelings. Especially when you feel angry or upset, it can be good to walk away until you feel calmer. Breathe deeply, tense and relax your muscles, or close your eyes and visualize a calm and peaceful place. Try to keep a sense of humor. Humor can be a great way to change how you feel. Think of something funny that makes you laugh, or share a joke with a friend. Sometimes you can even find the humor in the situation that’s causing the strong feelings. Sometimes people ignore their feelings or keep the feelings bottled up. This may be particularly true if they find a particular emotion difficult to experience. They might isolate themselves or not talk to anyone about how they’re Feeling. Sometimes people express their feelings in destructive or even violent ways that can hurt others. They might lash out at someone verbally or physically, or criticize or blame others for the way they feel. Sometimes people do things that hurt themselves in response to strong feelings. They might eat to feel better, drink alcohol or use other drugs. Expressing difficult emotions in unhealthy ways can be hurtful to yourself or others, either right away or over time. This doesn’t mean that you can’t or won’t do these things once in a while, especially if the difficult emotions are very strong. But you can learn ways to express or respond to your feelings that will be healthier options. Everyone experiences emotions, and sometimes those feelings can be difficult or even overwhelming. You can’t always control how you feel, and it’s actually a sign of positive emotional health to have a wide range of emotions. But you always have a choice about how you express or respond to your emotions. You can choose to do this in healthy or unhealthy ways. Being aware of your feelings and finding ways to express them that won’t hurt yourself or others is part of being a responsible and emotionally healthy person. Skills for Effective Communication Communication refers to how people send and receive information. What are some ways you communicate with the important people in your life? I-messages allow you to communicate your emotions clearly and in a healthy way. Using the word “I” helps you take responsibility for your emotions. I-messages don’t blame or attack the other person. Communication can be verbal, or with words, such as when people talk to each other in person or by phone. It can be written, such as when people write a letter or send a text. You can use I-messages in both verbal and written communication. Sometimes communication is nonverbal, or without words. The expression on a person’s face, hand gestures or how the person holds their body can all send a message. How people communicate with each other is a very important part of their relationships. When people can communicate effectively they can share their thoughts and feelings with others in healthy ways. I-messages are one example of this, but there are many things you can do to improve how you communicate. It’s important for clear communication to be sure your body language and tone of voice match the message you want to send. Body language is the nonverbal communication you send with your body. It includes gestures, how you are standing or sitting, how you move your body and your facial expressions. Another aspect of communication is the style in which you speak. Assertive communication means you state feelings, needs and opinions clearly and confidently, with respect for both yourself and the other person. Speaking clearly and using I-messages with confident body language is part of this communication style. Passive communication avoids expressing true feelings, needs or opinions. It often leads to agreeing to do something you don’t really want to do. Speaking softly or unsurely and using uncertain or withdrawn body language can be part of this communication style. Aggressive communication is harsh and shares feelings, needs or opinions without thinking about how it will affect others. It can include criticism or blame, be loud, and use tense or angry body language that can create or encourage conflict between people. There are many communication skills you can use when you’re speaking to someone that can help you express your thoughts and feelings clearly and build healthy relationships. ​ Use I-messages. ​ Be assertive, not passive or aggressive. This helps you say what you want or need while being respectful of the other person. You’ve had a chance to practice assertive communication too. ​ Be sure your body language and tone of voice match the message you intend to send. What you say nonverbally is important too. ​ Invite the other person to respond. This is part of the give and take of communicating with another person. When you’re open to hearing and considering the other person’s point of view it helps build trust and respect in your relationship. The person who’s been listening to you speak then knows that you also care about their opinions, feelings and ideas. Inviting a response can also help the other person do the same for you when they are the one speaking. Listening is as important to good communication as speaking clearly and effectively. When you’re listening to someone be sure to: ​ Pay attention and show that you’re listening. This means you focus on the person who’s talking to you and don’t interrupt. Sometimes it’s hard to pay attention because there are so many distractions. But giving someone your full attention when they are speaking is a great way to build good communication. Remember, too, that you communicate nonverbally when you’re listening, just as much as when you’re speaking. ​ Acknowledge what the speaker said. This can be as simple as repeating the main point or saying, “Thanks for telling me that.” It’s a way to be sure the person feels heard, so they will be willing to listen to you in turn. ​ Ask questions to clarify the message, if needed. It’s important to understand what someone has said if you want to have good communication. Asking questions about anything you didn’t understand or something you want to know more about is a way to be sure you really heard what the person wanted to say. When you know someone isn’t listening as you speak, you may think that they don’t consider what you say to be important. It can make you feel ignored, uncomfortable or not respected. Practicing your own listening skills is a way to make sure you give others the same attention you’d like to receive when you’re communicating. The last communication skill is to take turns speaking and listening. This is how people can exchange information and ideas, share their feelings with each other and build healthy relationships. If you’re communicating with someone and find yourself practicing only one of these sets of skills, it means you’re either speaking too much or just listening without communicating in return. If one person does all of the talking or all of the listening, a relationship isn’t balanced. You may have heard the saying “Communication is a two-way street.” This means that you really haven’t fully communicated until you know that the other person heard and understood what you said, and you’ve heard and understood what the other person wants to say in response.