Middle Childhood Socioemotional Development PDF

Chapter 10: Middle Childhood Socioemotional Development Learning Objectives: Middle Childhood Socioemotional Development 1. Describe emotional development middle childhood. 2. Discuss the link between emotional and intellectual development. 3. Explain ho...

Chapter 10: Middle Childhood Socioemotional Development Learning Objectives: Middle Childhood Socioemotional Development 1. Describe emotional development middle childhood. 2. Discuss the link between emotional and intellectual development. 3. Explain how emotional development relates to externalizing syndromes. 4. Explain the construct of callous unemotional traits. 5. Explain how emotional development relates to internalizing syndromes. 6. Discuss the development of emotion regulation in middle childhood. 7. Discuss the construct of emotional intelligence. 8. Discuss the attachment system and relationships in middle childhood. 9. Discuss the caregiving system and prosocial behavior in middle childhood. 10. Discuss the dominance system, bullying and hostile attribution bias in middle childhood. 11. Discuss the sexual system and gender identity in middle childhood. 12. Discuss self-concepts and self-esteem in middle childhood. Emotional Development in Middle Childhood Children express all the basic and social emotions by the end of early childhood. In middle childhood they further develop emotional competencies including (1) awareness of their own emotional states, (2) ability to discern others' emotions, (3) ability to name emotions, (4) capacity for empathic and sympathetic involvement, (5) ability to discriminate inner and outer emotional states, (6) capacity for adaptive coping with emotions, (7) emotional communication within relationships, and (8) capacity for emotional self-efficacy (Saami, 1999). Children develop emotional competence in the context of their relationships and culture. Expectations for emotional competence for girls tend to be higher than for boys who may also be taught to ignore their own and others’ emotional states. Aspects of emotional competence that relate to adjustment are discussed below. Emotional communication within relationships is discussed in the sections that cover the relationships children have. Students who plan careers working with children may want to study these sections carefully. Psychotherapy with children involves helping them achieve greater emotional competency. 250  We integrate evolutionary perspectives into our discussions of human development because we believe these perspectives help students to understand why certain clinical interventions work better than others. Here we are going to explain why mental health clinicians cannot ignore cognitive competencies when developing treatment plans for children. On a trip to the National Zoo one of us (LJL) looked this gorilla in the eyes and could see his intelligent awareness. She wondered, “Why Figure 0-1. Western lowland Gorilla, National Zoo does an animal that lives in the forest and eats leaves need to be this intelligent?” That big brain uses a lot of energy so it must be doing something! The answer is― gorillas (much like humans) have a complex social life and success in society depends on intelligence and a big brain (Van Schaik & Burkart, 2010). For humans, language capacity is part of intelligence and is critical for social life. You have learned that beginning at birth, there is a two-way interaction between language and social emotional growth. Mothers and fathers use language to soothe infants and they teach social rules using language. Conversations with caregivers improve preschool children’s emotion knowledge and emotion words (Garner, 1999). Having emotion knowledge and emotion words improves facial recognition of emotions (Beck et al., 2012). Researchers have developed creative ways to study emotion knowledge. One example is the Reading the Mind in the Eyes Test (RMET) used to evaluate how children, teens. and adults infer emotional states from just looking at the eyes (take the test) (Baker et al., 2014). RMET participants view photographs of a person’s eyes and are asked to judge which of four emotions the eyes express. A recent meta-analysis shows a moderate (.24) correlation between performance on the RMET and intelligence (Baker et al., 2014). One well done study using different methods found that language competence predicted 99% of individual differences in emotional competence in children between 7 and 9 years of age. The results suggest that during middle childhood emotional competence and language competence are entirely overlapping constructs (Beck et al., 2012). Improving language skills through education and through training parents in parent–child conversation, may promote children’s psychological well-being and reduce the development of clinical disorders (Salmon et al., 2016). 251 Emotional Awareness of Self and Others The first step in emotion regulation is to recognize one’s own emotional state and to name of the emotion (Chapter 7). Regarding self-awareness of emotional state, there are few studies looking at how this changes over middle childhood because self- awareness is difficult to measure. The few studies that have been done show that emotional self-awareness correlates with Gf, Gc, and verbal ability (Mancini et al., 2013). Female gender and the ability to recognize pictures of others’ emotions also predict emotional self-awareness. Lower emotional awareness predicts the internalizing symptoms of depression and anxiety in both boys and girls (Kranzler et al., 2016). Low emotional awareness also predicts 32% of individual differences in ODD symptoms in children with ADHD (Factor et al., 2016). Hence low emotional awareness predisposes children to both internalizing and externalizing problems. Figure 0-2. Pictures used in emotion recognition tests (Lawrence et al., 2015). Studies of children’s ability to recognize and name emotions of others agree that there are individual differences, and that recognition improves with age (Lawrence et al., 2015; Mancini et al., 2013; Vicari et al., 2000). Happiness and sadness are easier for children to recognize compared to other emotional states. Children who don’t recognize sadness and fear may behave more aggressively. Due to poor recognition, they may misinterpret others’ behavior or fail to appreciate that they have made someone feel badly (Acland et al., 2021). Family interactions predict emotional knowledge and maltreated children show low emotion recognition in some studies (Laamanen et al., 2022; Luke & Banerjee, 2013). 252 Emotions and Externalizing Symptoms Callous-Unemotional scale DSM 5 Limited Prosocial Emotions 1. Does not show feelings or emotions Shallow or deficient affect: Does not express feelings or show emotions to others, except in ways that seem shallow, insincere, or superficial or when emotional expressions are used for gain. 2. Helpful if someone is hurt, upset or feeling ill (R) 3. Feels bad or guilty when he/she does Lack of remorse or guilt: Does not feel bad or guilty something wrong (R) when he or she does something wrong (exclude remorse when expressed only when caught and/or facing punishment). The individual shows a general lack of concern about the negative consequences of his or her actions. For example, the individual is not remorseful after hurting someone or does not care about the consequences of breaking rules. 4. Has at least one good friend (R) 5. Considerate of other people’s feelings Callous—lack of empathy: Disregards and is (R) unconcerned about the feelings of others. The individual is described as cold and uncaring. The individual appears more concerned about the effects of his or her actions on himself or herself, rather than their effects on others, even when they result in substantial harm to others. 6. Kind to younger children (R) Unconcerned about performance: Does not show concern about poor/problematic performance at school, at work, or in other important activities. The individual does not put forth the effort necessary to perform well, even when 7. Is concerned about how well he/she expectations are clear, and typically blames others for his does at school (R) or her poor performance. Table 10-1. Measurement of Callous-Unemotional Traits (Viding et al., 2005) and Limited Prosocial Emotions, DSM 5 Externalizing behaviors and disorders occur when individuals act out their emotions on the external world through antisocial behavior, hostility, and aggression. Children with externalizing symptoms often have low emotion knowledge or low understanding of the emotional expressions of others (facial expressions, vocalizations, gestures). They may also lack knowledge of the social context of emotion or emotional scripts. This low emotion knowledge may play a causal role in externalizing disorders (Marsh & Blair, 2008). However not all children with externalizing disorders show emotional deficits. One meta-analysis found small correlations between low emotional knowledge and externalizing problems in middle childhood (Trentacosta & Fine, 2010). The finding is stronger as children get older and when externalizing symptoms are more severe. Emotional deficits in children are called “callous unemotional traits” (CU) (Table 10-1). Twin studies indicate that genes contribute to CU traits and whether or not children grow out of the traits between ages 7 and 12 (Fontaine et al., 2010; Viding et al., 2005). 253 Research findings regarding callous unemotional traits led to the construct being included in the DSM with the construct renamed “Limited Prosocial Emotions” (LPE) (Table 10-1). Clinicians now specify if a child with an externalizing disorder has LPE. Note that low attachment to school and lack of caring about performance is part of the construct. This is another example of the reciprocal link between emotional problems and cognition/academic performance. This reciprocal link and the co- occurrence of externalizing disorders and internalizing disorders is seen in longitudinal studies of children between ages 7 and 12 (Moilanen et al., 2010). Children with executive function deficits have academic and social problems. As a result of these problems, they don’t get enough enjoyment from school, hobbies, and relationships. They may be victims or perpetrators of bullying and engage in risky behavior out of boredom. This way of coping only makes them more distressed, and they fall further behind academically. Parents, educators, and clinicians can help break this cycle by finding ways to reengage children in healthy activities. They also can help foster self- regulation and social skills. Emotions and Internalizing Symptoms Whereas externalizing behaviors are acted out, internalizing behaviors are acted in. Internalizing behaviors and disorders manifest as processes within the self, such as anxiety and depression. In earlier chapters you learned that the behavioral inhibition system enables people to avoid danger. When it is active people feel fear and anxiety. You also learned that some people are more sensitive than others to cues of threat. Behavioral Inhibition is a temperamental trait observable in toddlers who show more fearfulness in response to new people and new objects (Kagan et al., 1984). The offspring of adults with internalizing disorders such as anxiety and depression are more behaviorally inhibited (Rosenbaum et al., 1993). In middle childhood, behavioral inhibition also manifests as the personality trait neuroticism (Five Factor Model) (Muris & Dietvorst, 2006). Neuroticism is the tendency to experience negative affect, including anger, anxiety, self‐consciousness, irritability, emotional instability, and depression. Children, teens and adults with high neuroticism react strongly to stress, interpret many situations as threatening, and often feel overwhelmed (Widiger & Oltmanns, 2017). Children with high levels of neuroticism may develop social phobia, anxiety and/or depression. Children prone to internalizing symptoms may also have problems using emotion regulation strategies, and so they ruminate or have repetitive negative thoughts (Rood et al., 2009). Behaviorally inhibited children with high levels of neuroticism, may have problems with emotion recognition and knowledge that interfere with their use of social skills (Trentacosta & Fine, 2010). Internalizing symptoms and social problems may lead to school refusal. Children with internalizing symptoms can be helped with cognitive behavioral therapy. This therapy strengthens their ability to use cognition to regulate their emotions (Suveg et al., 2018). 254 Emotion Regulation in Middle Childhood Supportive Parental Reactions Non-Supportive Parental Reactions Home more likely to be calm with sleep, Home more likely to be crowded, noisy meal, recreation, and homework routines and lacking in routines (more stressful) Parents are warm and responsive Parents are cold and punitive Parents validate emotions by helping Parents minimize distress and children make sense of their reactions communicate that emotions are not acceptable Parents accept emotions as part of life Parents are unaccepting and avoidant Parents can “be with” a child in an Parents are overly distressed by the emotional state child’s emotions Parents help with emotional problem Parents devalue emotional problems solving Child develops emotion regulation skills Child avoids and suppresses emotions and is prone to outbursts of sadness and anger. Table 10-2. Parental reactions and coping with children’s emotions influence child emotion regualtion (Compas et al., 2017). Emotion regulation means responding to emotions in adaptive ways, and moderating extremes of both positive and negative emotions. Considering development between birth and puberty, we can’t help but notice that it takes children a very long time to grow up and when they reach puberty they are still not emotionally fully developed. It is understandable that life circumstances can make it relatively easier or difficult for parents to cope with their children’s emotions. Parents can react to and cope with children’s emotions in both supportive and non-supportive ways (Table 10-2). Parents who have a stressful life and children who are more emotional have more trouble coping. Parents model emotion regulation skills when they express their own emotions without losing control and name the emotions they feel. They also model empathy and sympathy when they react to their child’s emotions with kindness and validation. Parents teach emotion regulation skills when they label their child’s emotions, help the child problem solve, and use coping strategies. Parents also influence emotion regulation by providing a home environment for the child that is stable and calm (Compas et al., 2017). Emotion regulation skills reduce risk for internalizing and externalizing behavior problems in middle childhood. In addition, effective treatments for internalizing, externalizing, and trauma-related problems contain strategies for increasing emotion regulation skills in both children and caregivers (Blaustein & Kinniburgh, 2018; Southam-Gerow, 2013). Emotional intelligence (EI) (Salovey & Mayer, 1990) is construct that includes emotion self-regulation. General Intelligence (g) (discussed in Chapter 9), is a capacity that 255 enables people to problem solve, make sense of things, and figure out what to do. Review the model of emotions we presented in Chapter 7 and note that emotions do indeed help people make sense of things. The construct of EI includes “four abilities: 1) to perceive and appraise emotions accurately; 2) to access and evoke emotions when they facilitate cognition; 3) to comprehend emotional language and make use of emotional information; and 4) to regulate one’s own and others’ emotions to promote growth and well-being” (APA Dictionary of Psychology). The Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) model of “wise mind” contends that many decisions are best made considering both emotions and cognitions (Linehan, 2014). When emotions are too strong, they overwhelm cognition and so emotion regulation is important and is included in the list of abilities that comprise EI. EI was popularized by a best-selling book, Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ by Daniel Goleman. While the construct of EI is useful in theory, the construct is difficult to measure. Tests of EI are not as sound as tests of overall intelligence (Brody, 2004). EI is measured three ways: by ability/performance, self-report, and a mixture of the two. These measures do not always agree (Somaa et al., 2021). Ability and self-report measures have been researched more in adults and adolescents than in children. Studies in children indicate that ability and self-report EI measures may correlate (Climie et al., 2019; Peters et al., 2009; Williams et al., 2009). There are not enough studies of the EI construct in children to prove the construct can be measured well enough in children (Williams et al., 2009). While the construct of emotional intelligence is on shaky grounds (at least in children), there is solid support for the importance of emotion regulation and other self-regulation skills. These contribute to academic success and emotional well-being in children. Attachment and Caregiving in Middle Childhood To review, the attachment system allows a person to feel secure knowing another person will provide support when needed. In early childhood parents provide a secure base for children to explore, feeling relaxed and unafraid. If children run into difficulty, they return to the caregiver who acts as a safe haven and provides support. After age 5 children gain autonomy and increasingly feel secure while away from caregivers. They are secure knowing they can return for support when they need it. Older children are less concerned with staying physically close to parents and more concerned with parents being there if needed (Di Folco et al., 2017). Secure attachment to both parents continues to be very important to children in middle childhood. Fathers become more important as children get older especially for boys. In some cultures, middle childhood is the time when boys start to spend most of their time with their fathers and other males 256 as opposed to their mothers (Muller et al., 2009). Children in middle childhood still rely on parents more than peers for emotional support. The importance of attachment to both parents increases with age over middle childhood as children work to achieve in school and with peers (Diener et al., 2008). Children who have secure attachment to their parent(s) in middle childhood do better academically and socially. Children with avoidant and disorganized attachment have higher levels of externalizing behavior and peer rejection (Granot & Mayseless, 2001). Experiences of security in the family provide children with internal working models or scripts of caring relationships. The caring script has the following sequence “(a) the individual is meaningfully engaged in the environment; (b) some challenge is presented, interrupting the activity at hand; (c) a signal of distress is made to the attachment figure; (d) the signal is recognized by the attachment figure, and an attempt to assist is offered; (e) assistance is accepted; (f) support is instrumentally effective in resolving distress; (g) support is emotionally effective; and (h) the individual becomes meaningfully reengaged in the environment” (Waters et al., 2019, p. 2380). Scripts can be used to assess the attachment system because children will spontaneously tell stories that contain the script when provided with a scenario where a child needs help (e.g., scary dog in the yard, injury at the beach, losing a soccer game) (Waters et al., 2019). Two such such assessment tools are the Middle Childhood Attachment Script Assessment and the Secure Base Script Test (Di Folco et al., 2017; Psouni & Apetroaia, 2014); the coherence of a child’s narrative story is also assed when evaluating children’s script stories (Waters et al., 2019). Researchers are still working on improving the reliability and validity of attachment measures for middle childhood (Jewell et al., 2019). Children in middle childhood are able to turn to grandparents, teachers, extended family and peers, to meet security needs (Murakam & Sakurai, 2014; Seibert & Kerns, 2009). Attachment internal working models or scripts are not static but can change. Middle childhood offers both challenges and opportunity. Children obtain security from their relationships and increasingly practice the role of caregiver with others. Stressful life events and peer victimization can erode secure base scripts whereas friendships and stable parenting can support scripts (Waters et al., 2019). Secure base scripts are associated with knowledge of effective emotion regulation strategies and with emotion knowledge (Colle & Del Giudice, 2011). Caregiving and Prosocial Behavior The friendships children establish in middle childhood and the time they spend at school offer them opportunities to practice caring behavior. Children define prosocial behavior as being friends, including others in a group, and sharing/caring (Greener & Crick, 1999). Researchers define prosocial behavior at school as: 1) Offering help/comfort; 2) showing concern with moral issues; 3) Acting friendly; 4) Cooperating with peers; 5) listening to peers; 6) Acting kind; 7) Taking turns; 8) Seeming concerned; and 9) Compromising in conflict. With this criteria 67% of fourth grade children show all forms 257 of prosocial behavior, 7% show kindness and no other prosocial behavior, 8% show only friendliness, and 18% show almost no prosocial behavior (Ma et al., 2020). Children who show almost no prosocial behavior and only friendliness also behave more aggressively. Children who show more prosocial behavior have better self- regulation which allows them to abide by social norms. They are also more responsible and able to focus on other’s needs (Ma et al., 2020). Friendship During Middle Childhood By age four, many children use the word “friend” when referring to certain peers (Laursen & Hartup, 2002). Children that spend most of the day away from their parents, find special friends that they rely on for security and companionship. The word find is operative because friends are not random associations; children choose their friends. Note that children choose friends from the available pool of peers. This is where neighborhood factors are important as the school and neighborhood provide the peers children choose from. If there are more peers available, similarity or homophyly in friend choice increases (Ilmarinen et al., 2017). More often friends are alike in many respects including, gender, race, academic ability, disability status, level of antisocial behavior, and personality traits (Kouvava et al., 2022). Children choose friends with the same level of Openness as themselves to facilitate having common interests (Ilmarinen et al., 2017). Children who are better adjusted are more likely to choose ethnically diverse friends (Qi et al., 2022). Friendship is a special relationship defined by three factors:“(1) each member of the dyad affirms the existence of the friendship; (2) the relationship derives primarily from mutual affection; each partner views the other partner, and the relationship itself, as pleasant, fun, and likable. At the same time, the primary motivation for the relationship is not instrumental need; and (3) the relationship is voluntary; it is neither obligatory nor prescribed” (Rubin et al., 2008, p. 1085). Friendship has four main functions in middle childhood: 1) it provides a sense of self-worth and personal validation; 2) it serves a protective function. (Chronically friendless children and children who lose their friends are more likely to suffer peer victimization.); 3) it facilitates learning and development of new skills; and 4) it shapes development through shared cultures (Maunder & Monks, 2019). (Bowker et al., 2006). Children enter their friendships with the working models or scripts of attachment, caregiving, and dominance they acquired in their families of origin. The attachment- caregiving script has two roles, one individual provides care, and the other individual receives care. Friendship is different from the parent-child relationship because children alternate playing both roles. Social competency is developed within friendships because children practice prosocial caretaking behavior. They also practice sharing power within the relationship. Studies of friendship quality reveal that caring contributes to positive quality, whereas one sided dominance reduces quality (Berndt, 2002, 2004). Prosocial behavior and assertiveness predict friendship quality (Dryburgh et al., 2022). 258 Those who have siblings may have an advantage because caring and power sharing may be practiced with siblings as well as friends (Kitzmann et al., 2002). Stages of Friendship Concepts Selman’s (1977) Bigelow and La Gaipa (1975) Stage 1 (3–7 years) Momentary physicalist Stage 1, Reward-cost, friendship playmates: a friend is a playmate who lives focuses on mutual activities. close by. Stage 2 (4–9 years) One-way assistance: a Stage 2, Normative expectation friend is someone who gives care and shares. the emphasis is on a friend as someone who is kind and shares with you. Stage 3 (6–12 years) Fair-weather Stage 3, Empathy and cooperation: friendship is viewed as understanding, friends are loyal to reciprocal. Friends return favors. each other, committed to the relationship, and share intimate information. Stage 4 (11–15 years) Intimate and mutually shared relationships: friendships are about mutual intimacy (sharing secrets) and support. Stage 5 (12 to adulthood) Autonomous interdependent friendships: Acceptance, sharing of common interests and deeper feelings are important. Table 10-3. Changes in the way children think about friendship as they get older. Two meta-analyses covering a 45-year period show that individual differences in parent- child attachment security have a small effect on friendship quality (Pallini et al., 2014; Schneider et al., 2001). Although parental relationships are helpful, children still must learn to have reciprocal friendships with peers. Reciprocal relationships require prosocial behavior and the ability to flexibly shift roles in the relationship. Reciprocity and quality friendships also require children to avoid dominating or controlling one another (Berndt, 2002). A loving family helps children begin to learn reciprocity but does not guarantee they will have quality friendships. One rule of skill learning is that skills must be practiced in the context they are learned and skill use may not transfer from one setting to another (Linehan, 2014). Cross sectional and longitudinal studies reveal that most children are prosocial with their friends at an early age but that caring and intimacy increase progressively (Afshordi & Liberman, 2021) (Table 10-3). Note that studies differ as to how friendship behavior is assessed. The stage models listed in Table 10-3 were developed by asking 259 children to describe their friendships. Selman developed the first model 40 years ago, but a recent study replicated his findings (Marcone & Caputo, 2019). Studies asking children to identify aspects of their friendships from a list elicit more responses than children can spontaneously report (Furman & Bierman, 1984). For example, between 4 and 9 years of age children report “one-way assistance” because they may not spontaneously report helping their friends. Relationships at this age are thus more reciprocal than children report spontaneously (Afshordi & Liberman, 2021). Children may benefit from explicit discussions regarding prosocial behavior and reciprocity so they can label their own actions. With attachment and caring comes the possibility of grief over the loss of the relationship as we discussed in Chapter 5. The amount of grief experienced is a measure of the strength of the relationship. Beginning at 5-6 years of age children can be deeply affected when close friends move away (Park, 1992). In one prospective study, loss of a close friendship increased risk for clinical mental health problems as much as parental separation, and parental mental illness (Ford et al., 2007). Taken together these studies indicate children form strong emotionally significant bonds with their close friends. Animal Friendships Pets might serve the social needs of some children who have difficulty due to peer rejection and anxiety. Up to three quarters of families have pets, most commonly dogs, and dog ownership increased over the pandemic (Esposito et al., 2011; Tilford, 2022). Children who help care for pets can learn prosocial behavior and practice empathy. Although dogs might supply unconditional love, reciprocity; theory of mind and empathy are also important to dog friendships. Children who report quality dog friendships are more likely to also have quality family and peer relationships (Kerns et al., 2017). Curiosity and learning about pets can contribute to children’s cognitive development. In addition, companion animals can provide social support to children, buffering them from stress. Pets can help children with low social skills by attracting the attention of other children and acting as conversational ice breakers. Children who have dogs are also less likely to be overweight (Esposito et al., 2011). It is also important to consider the negative effects of pets. Dogs who bite and injure a family member are most likely to attack a child between 5 and 9. Injuries from cats also occur but are less frequent (Ostanello et al., 2005). Cats can be a source of toxoplasmosis, a teratogenic disease (CDC - Toxoplasmosis, 2021). The welfare of the animal is also a consideration. Distressed families may not be able to provide for the pet. In families affected by domestic violence, perpetrators may target pets; callous children may also abuse pets (Esposito et al., 2011). Read a National Institutes of Health Article on the “Power of Pets.” 260 Many students are interested in Animal Assisted Therapy (AAT). The popularity of these therapies is perhaps larger than the evidence base for them (Esposito et al., 2011). The most proven therapy is Equine Assisted Therapy (EAT) (Charry-Sánchez et al., 2018). EAT improves motor function in children with cerebral palsy and reduces pain in children with medical problems (Charry-Sánchez et al., 2018). Dogs may facilitate play therapy with children. Interested students should read the American Counseling Association position paper Animal-Assisted Therapy in Counseling Competencies (Stewart et al., 2016) and review the links in Table 10-4. Animal Assisted Therapy Organizations and Certification Path International Certifications related to the use of horses including Equine Specialist in Mental Health and Learning Pet Partners Certifications in animal assisted therapies. Therapy Dogs International The Good Dog Foundation International Institute of Animal Assisted Play Therapy (IIAPT) Table 10-4. Animal assisted therapy organizations. The Dominance System in Middle Childhood Children participate in one-on-one friendships with a few peers. Issues of power and dominance occur within these friendships and can be a source of conflict. High conflict friendships do not last (Selman et al., 1977). Empathy and self-regulation enable children to take turns, share and avoid dominating friends. Emotional bonds and the benefits of friendship are incentives for children to share power with friends. In addition to competing with friends, children compete with others in their peer group. As children approach puberty (by fifth grade), the peer group becomes increasingly important to them. At that time, children have “a relationship” with the group, that is created by their reputation in the group and the sum of all the individual interactions they have (Lease, Musgrove, et al., 2002). Recent studies indicate that children face tradeoffs between friendship and popularity because behaviors required for status within the group may not be compatible with maintaining long term friendships (Cillessen & Mayeux, 2004; Crick, 1996). Maintenance and achievement of status requires strategic use of aggression that may be detrimental to friendships. We now describe research regarding popularity, friendship, aggression, and prosocial behavior in children between the ages of 6 and 12. Researchers study group relations using sociometric assessment. They ask children to name the three children that they are 1) friends with, 2) like, 3) that are popular or that 4) are influential/dominant. Importantly, children are also asked to name peers that are the opposite of these qualities. The nominations children get are then added up and children categorized by number of nominations they get both positive and negative (Lease, Musgrove, et al., 2002; Newcomb et al., 1993). We discuss different categories 261 of children below after we explain problems researchers have had understanding children’s social behavior. Because researchers studying the peer group were not familiar with the dominance system described by ethologists, they could not reconcile why some children are both popular and disliked (Lease, Musgrove, et al., 2002). Visibility and aggression explain the puzzle of why popular children may be disliked. Visibility refers to how much a person is noticed, and this differs for boys and girls. Specifically, for boys visibility relates to athletic skills, and for girls physical attractiveness is important (Lease, Kennedy, et al., 2002). Over the grade school years, visibility becomes an important indicator of social status. In this feature humans do not differ from other primates in that individuals with high social status are more attended to by group members (Leedom, 2014). With respect to aggression, researchers have assessed physical and relational (AKA social) aggression separately. Measures of relational aggression typically include questions regarding psychological aggression (e.g., ignores peer when angry) (Crick, 1996). Year to year, children’s use of both physical and relational aggression tends to be stable relative to others in their peer group. Individuals use aggression both to achieve and maintain social status. Although aggression is labeled “maladjustment” studies consistently link aggression to visibility and social status (Crick, 1996; Palacios et al., 2022). In short, aggression is not as much of a turnoff in the larger group as you might think. Why is aggression linked to both maladjustment and social status? When attractive, visible children use aggression it may not detract from their status. However, by 8th grade aggression becomes undesirable in friends, even though aggressive peers are still admired and emulated (Crick, 1996; Lease, Musgrove, et al., 2002). While visible and aggressive youths might be popular, they do not necessarily have the kinds of friendships that improve wellbeing. Children that have both friends and status are more prosocial and do not use aggressive strategies (Hawley et al., 2002). The desire for visibility is linked to aggressive strategies, loneliness and negative affect even when individuals attain their visibility goals (Hawley et al., 2002). This research has important implications for those working with depressed and lonely children. It might be puzzling as to why a child who is attractive and popular reports no rewarding friendships and high levels of negative affect and loneliness. Children may be more physically and relationally aggressive than adults realize. Furthermore, aggression may not seem to be a problem to a person if it is effective in helping them achieve their social goals. Hostile Attribution Bias Hostile attribution bias may also interfere with adjustment. Young children who cannot “mentalize” or understand other children’s intentions are prone to Hostile Attribution 262 Bias (HAB) or a tendency to attribute hostile intentions to others during social mishaps where intent is ambiguous (Dodge, 2006). For example, “Suppose a child has a soda spilled on her by a peer at a lunch table; was it an accident, or did her peer intentionally spill the drink on her?” (Choe et al., 2013, p. 2245). HAB is higher in early childhood then tends to decrease in middle childhood as children gain social experiences and learn how to interpret other’s behavior. Grade school children with HAB tend to be more aggressive (Dodge, 2006). Bullying increases HAB in children by confirming their fears about others’ aggression (Kouvava et al., 2022; Perren et al., 2013). Bullying The link between aggression and popularity explains why bullying is such a problem in schools. Although children and adults may explicitly say that aggression is wrong, that explicit belief may not guide their behavior because of the strong link between status and aggression in humans of all ages. Parents may be proud of a child’s status irrespective of aggression. Teachers may find popular and attractive children likable and therefore not understand their aggression (Marucci et al., 2021). According to Stopbullying.gov , a federal government website managed by the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services, bullying is defined as unwanted, aggressive behavior among school aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. Further, the aggressive behavior happens more than once or has the potential to be repeated. There are different types of bullying, including verbal bullying, which is saying or writing mean things, teasing, name calling, taunting, threatening, or making inappropriate sexual comments. Social bullying, also referred to as relational bullying, involves spreading rumors, purposefully excluding someone from a group, or embarrassing someone on purpose. Physical Bullying involves hurting a person’s body or possessions. A more recent form of bullying is cyberbullying, which involves electronic technology. Examples of cyberbullying include sending mean text messages or emails, creating fake profiles, and posting embarrassing pictures, videos, or rumors on social networking sites. Children who experience cyberbullying have a harder time getting away from the behavior because it can occur any time of day and without being in the presence of others. Additional concerns of cyberbullying include that messages and images can be posted anonymously, distributed quickly, and be difficult to trace or delete. Children who are cyberbullied are more likely to: experience in-person bullying, be unwilling to attend school, receive poor grades, use alcohol and drugs, skip school, have lower self- esteem, and have more health problems. Bulling peaks in middle school but is still prevalent in high school and beyond (NCES Fast Facts Tool, 2022). Victims of Bullying Bullying can happen to anyone, but some students are at an increased risk for being bullied including lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgendered (LGBT) youth, those with disabilities, and those who are socially isolated. Additionally, those who are perceived 263 as different, weak, less popular, overweight, or having low self-esteem, have a higher likelihood of being bullied. Perpetrators of bullying can also be victims. Bullied children often do not ask for help: Unfortunately, most children do not let adults know that they are being bullied. Some fear retaliation from the bully, while others are too embarrassed to ask for help. Those who are socially isolated may not know who to ask for help or believe that no one would care or assist them if they did ask for assistance. Consequently, it is important for parents and teacher to know the warning signs that may indicate a child is being bullied. These include unexplainable injuries, lost or destroyed possessions, changes in eating or sleeping patterns, declining school grades, not wanting to go to school, loss of friends, decreased self-esteem and/or self- destructive behaviors. In summary, bullying is not an isolated behavior. Nor is it a category of behavior unto itself. Bullying is dominance behavior and for some children, teens, and adults it is an effective tool. Bullying cannot be reduced without attending to issues of social power and social justice because humans are naturally inclined to perpetrate and tolerate bullying as instrumental to status goals. Sexual System and Middle Childhood Children achieve a full understanding of gender constancy by 6-7 years of age (Halim & Ruble, 2010). Other aspects of gender include centrality, gender stereotypes, gender conformity, regard, and homophily (Braun & Davidson, 2017; Halim & Ruble, 2010). Gender centrality refers to how important gender is to the individual’s self-concept. Gender stereotypes are relatively fixed, overly simplified concepts of the attitudes and behaviors considered normal and appropriate for a male or female in a particular culture. In longitudinal studies of children aged 5–10 years, the period of rigid gender stereotypes is short-lived and followed by greater flexibility. Gender rigidity peaks by age 5–6 and then decreases (Halim & Ruble, 2010). Gender conformity refers to the degree to which children feel compelled to behave according to gender stereotypes. Gender regard concepts are for both private and public domains. Private regard refers to how a person feels about their gender. Public regard refers to how the person perceives their gender is regarded by others. Homophily refers to friendship preferences based on sameness. Friendships in middle childhood are strongly sex segregated. Pink Frilly Dresses and Tomboys During early child (about age 4) girls become aware of and think positively about their gender and three quarters want to wear pink frilly dresses. These desires are self- generated by the girls irrespective of parental desires. According to Hamlin (2011, p. 934) “These girls not only love pink – they demand to wear pink and refuse to wear pants nearly every single day and for every occasion, even when inconvenient and inappropriate, such as when they have run out of clean pink clothes or when embarking 264 on a day of strenuous outdoor activities.” This intense gender identification seems to reinforce identity formation at that age. Then as girls get into elementary school, most no longer feel intensely about feminine dress, and up to ½ consider themselves to be tomboys. While four- and five-year-old boys also strongly identify with their gender, boys do not undergo a similar rejection of gender norms in grade school. Why do some girls give up dresses and become tomboys? While girls may not regard their feminine gender negatively, they become increasingly aware of women’s lower status. At this time they may become more interested in masculine behaviors and activities as a way of identifying with more powerful role models (Halim et al., 2011). Second and third graders are more able to flexibly view gender and recognize differences within gender categories. Girls can therefore allow themselves to be low in “girliness” and still identify as girls (Halim et al., 2011). Children are less rejecting of gender nonconforming girls than they are of gender nonconforming boys (Braun & Davidson, 2017). Transgender and Gender Dysphoria Children who have preferences and behaviors that are opposite to those of their sex assigned at birth (like the tomboys discussed above) are referred to as "gender nonconforming." The term "transgender" describes a person who transiently or persistently identifies with a gender different from their sex assigned at birth. DSM 5, "Gender dysphoria" refers to clinically significant distress (of at least 6 month's duration) related to the incongruence between one's "affirmed" or "experienced gender" and one's "assigned gender." Using the term "dysphoria" means that a transgender identity is not pathological, and instead, the dysphoria is the clinical concern. Individuals who are transgender vary along a continuum of the strength of their identification. Some individuals wish they were the opposite gender, other individuals believe themselves to be the opposite gender. According to Rosenthal (2016, p. 186), “The majority of gender dysphoric prepubertal youth will no longer meet the mental health criteria for gender dysphoria once puberty has begun.” Clinicians cannot predict which individuals will feel differently after puberty, but those who do not feel differently have more dysphoria. Clinical consensus is that medical delay of puberty poses little risk and may give some children time to work on a better adjustment Read more about medical treatment for transgender youth. Watch PBS video about a transgender child The Self in Middle Childhood Self-Awareness Important aspects of self-awareness arise and/or improve during middle childhood. The first of these is metacognition or insight into one's thoughts. Metacognition includes metacognitive awareness and metacognitive skills (Sperling et al., 2004). Metacognitive 265 skills are used to regulate and monitor cognition. Being able to evaluate how well one has learned or remembered information is important to academic success (Mayer, 1998). Children are also aware of cognitive strategies they use to regulate emotional states (metacognitive emotion regulation) (Davis et al., 2010). Self-awareness abilities enable children to participate in cognitive behavioral therapy and learn self- management skills. They also enable children to monitor their own emotional states and behavior in the context of other people’s expectations. Psychologists have identified two aspects of self-awareness called private and public self-consciousness. Private self- consciousness is assessed by self-report items such as: I notice my inner feelings, I like to understand what my feelings mean, and I like to understand why I do things. Public self-consciousness is assessed with items such as: I worry about the way I look, and It is important for me to look good. These constructs have been reliably assessed in grade school children and appear to be valid indications of these processes in middle childhood (Takishima-Lacasa et al., 2014). Children’s self-awareness also manifests in their ability to alter their behavior to make favorable impressions on others (Banerjee et al., 2012). Definitions of Psychological Constructs Regarding the Self Self-Awareness: Self-focused attention or knowledge. Self-Focused Attention: the direction of conscious attention on oneself and one’s thoughts, needs, desires, and emotions. Self-Concepts: How individuals think about and judge themselves. Self-Concept Domains: Aspects of a person that are part of the self-concept including: appearance, gender, moral, academic, athletic, social (friendships, race/ethnicity, and peer acceptance) Self-Esteem: the degree to which the qualities and characteristics contained in one's self-concept are perceived to be positive. How much individuals like themselves. Self-Efficacy: an individual’s subjective perception of his or her capability to perform in a given setting or to attain desired results. Self-Monitoring (two distinct constructs): 1. A method used in behavioral management in which individuals keep a record of their behavior. 2. A personality trait reflecting an ability to modify one’s behavior in response to situational pressures, opportunities, and norms. Self-Presentation (AKA Impression Management): any behaviors intended to convey a particular image of, or particular information about, the self to other people. Table 10-5. Important vocabulary related to self-functioning. Find these and other definitions on the APA website Self-Concepts Self-concepts begin to develop in early childhood. Children experience their own growth and development and receive praise from caregivers such as, “you learned to tie your shoes today!” As a result, at the start of kindergarten, children are naturally inclined to perceive themselves as powerful and able. This overly optimistic self-view is adaptive 266 because positive emotions and self-concepts motivate individuals to work at mastering skills. People try to live up to the self-concepts they have so at all ages self- concepts partly determine expressed behavior. Helping professionals who work with individuals to change behaviors must learn to leverage client/patient self-concepts. Stated another way “if one is interested in significant behavior change, one must change (or work with) self-concepts” (Markus & Nurius, 1984). Middle childhood is the time when children develop competencies and become aware of their newly acquired abilities. During elementary school, children gain experience comparing their skills to those of others; and between second and fourth grade they develop the cognitive maturity needed to judge their own performance compared to that of others. As a result, by fourth grade their self-evaluations become more realistic and children may experience a drop in self-esteem (Magro et al., 2019). Success in academic domains contributes to self-efficacy beliefs and these beliefs in turn predict grades later on (Davis-Kean et al., 2008). Not only do children evaluate themselves, but they also receive feedback from others. This feedback gives children a sense of their worth to others. Global self-esteem in middle school children depends more on friendship and family support than on specific self-concepts (Magro et al., 2019).The specific self-concepts that are most studied are physical appearance, social, academic (language and math), and athletic. Children appraise themselves differently in these domains and their self-appraisals are stable through adolescence and early adulthood (Putnick et al., 2020). Racial and Ethnic Self-Concepts “Race refers to the concept of dividing people into groups based on various sets of physical characteristics and the process of ascribing social meaning to those groups. Ethnicity describes the culture of people in a given geographic region, including their language, heritage, religion and customs” (Teresa, 2018). Racial and ethnic self- concepts form in early childhood and coalesce during adolescence as racial and ethnic identity. During early childhood, racial and ethnic self-concepts start with identification, that is recognizing oneself as a member of a group (Akiba et al., 2004). First graders are able to state their ethnic identity but their concept of the meaning of the identity is not as sophisticated as that of fourth graders (Akiba et al., 2004). Many children develop racial prejudice by the start of first grade (de França & Monteiro, 2013). Similarly, children of color are aware of discrimination against them by early grade school (Rowley et al., 2008). 267  Conscience Development in Middle Childhood Heinz A man’s wife is dying of cancer and there is only one drug that can save her. The only place to get the drug is at the store of a pharmacist who is known to overcharge people for drugs. The man can only pay $1,000, but the pharmacist wants $2,000, and refuses to sell it to him for less, or to let him pay later. Desperate, the man later breaks into the pharmacy and steals the medicine. Should he have done that? Was it right or wrong? Why? (Kohlberg, 1984) In Chapter 7 we discussed the earliest influences on the development of conscience. Here we refine the definition of conscience to include the capacity to 1) mindfully experience moral emotions, 2) engage in moral cognition, and 3) possess moral self- concepts. As children gain experience with friends, they practice resolving conflicts with those outside the family. Children are taught rules of conduct in school and are expected to abide by them. In this context children have moral emotions and start thinking about moral questions. We first discuss moral cognition and then will discuss moral emotions and moral self-concepts. Moral Cognition or Moral Reasoning Age Moral Level Description Young children- Preconventional Stage 1: Focus is on self-interest and punishment is usually prior to morality avoided. The man shouldn’t steal the drug, as he age 9 may get caught and go to jail. Reward and Stage 2: Rewards are sought. A person at this level Punishment will argue that the man should steal the drug because Orientation he does not want to lose his wife who takes care of him. Older children, Conventional Stage 3: Focus is on how situational outcomes adolescents, morality impact others and wanting to please and be and most adults accepted. The man should steal the drug because Oriented to Social that is what good husbands do. Acceptance and Stage 4: People make decisions based on laws or Obeying Rules formalized rules. The man should obey the law because stealing is a crime. Rare with Postconventional Stage 5: Individuals employ abstract reasoning to adolescents and morality justify behaviors. The man should steal the drug few adults because laws can be unjust, and you have to Oriented to Moral consider the whole situation. Principles Stage 6: Moral behavior is based on self-chosen ethical principles. The man should steal the drug because life is more important than property. Table 10-6. Kohlberg’s stages of moral reasoning. 268 Moral Self-Concepts Self-concepts are developed in middle childhood, and these become the basis for identity in adolescence and adulthood. Moral self-concepts build moral identity. Three- and four-year-old children have ideas about right and wrong actions, and they have been shown to experience guilt over their actions. It is not until age 8 that children demonstrate they have moral self-concepts or they consider moral values to be an important part of who they are. Moral self-concepts are important because when values are central to how people see themselves, they try to live up to those values (Blasi & Glodis, 1995). More research needs to be done to understand the moral self in 8–12- year-old children. Children of this age understand that shame goes along with failure to live up to a valued self-concept. When asked about how a character in a story would feel after failing to live up to self-connected moral value, eight but not seven-year-old children identify shame as the main emotion. Their narratives also indicate they understand that shame is connected to failure to live up to valued self-concepts (Kingsford et al., 2022). Moral self-concept as assessed through puppet interview predicted 8 year old children’s choices to share in another study (Christner et al., 2020). In summary, studies using different methods point to age 8 as being important to development of self-concepts including moral self-concepts. Summary of Social and Emotional Development During Middle Childhood Figure 10-3. Summary of social and emotional development during middle childhood. Brain development allows the child to grow cognitively, and cognition enables greater emotion regulation. Children of this age develop self-concepts because they can assess themselves and compare themselves to others. These self-concepts then guide their behavior. Attachments extend beyond family to friends during this period and children learn to balance their needs for friendship and peer status. Status in the peer group is more important by age 12. 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Describe aspects of the school environment including educational inequality and school shootings. 8. Describe the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child. In Chapter 1 you learned about the Bioecological Model (Ryan, John & Paquette, Dede, 2009) and the layers of the environment that interact in individual’s lives. The immediate environment for the child (microsystem) consists of the home and family, school, neighborhood, and extended family and faith groups (Figure11-1). In the neighborhood, children are exposed to more violence and crime than are adults. A government survey showed that in 2009 forty percent of children reported being direct victims of violence. Sixty percent of children reported either direct or indirect exposure to violence, crime, or abuse (Facts about Children and Violence, 2014). We describe aspects of the family and educational environment below as applies to American children. We end the chapter with a discussion of children’s rights. Figure 11-1 Immediate environments of child development 281  Home and Family In 1968, 13% of children resided with single parents, Now 23% live with one parent (usually mother) and no other adults, the remainder live with either two parents or a parent and stepparent (Kramer, 2019). Around 140,000 children are adopted by American families each year. There are about 1.5 million adopted children in the United States, which is 2% of the population, or one out of 50 children. Today, almost 60%- 70% of domestic adoptions are open adoptions, which means there is a degree of openness and disclosure of information between adoptive and birth parents regarding the adopted child (US Adoption Statistics, 2020). American children are less likely than children from other countries to live with extended family (Kramer, 2019). The result is that fewer adults are available to support parents and children emotionally and financially. Worldwide most people live close to family for economic reasons (Kramer, 2019). The percentage of children living in poverty dropped recently from 16.0% to 15.3% due to anti-poverty measures (read more). Blended families contain stepparents and step or halfsiblings. One in six American children (16%) live in blended families (Parker & Horowitz, 2015). Blended families are more complex, but they have been around throughout human history. In the 1700-1800s there were many blended families, but they were created because a parent died, and the surviving partner remarried. Most blended families today result from divorce and remarriage, and this origin leads to new considerations. Children in the blended families of today may be a part of two households, each with different rules and people to adjust to. Lesbian and Gay Parenting In 2016 there were an estimated 114,000 same sex couples raising children; 25% were gay men and 75% were lesbian women. While 68% of these couples had biologic children, the rest had adopted or foster children (Goldberg & Conron, 2018). Research has consistently shown that the children of lesbian and gay parents are as successful as those of heterosexual parents. Patterson (2009) reviewed more than 25 years of social science research on the development of children raised by lesbian and gay parents and found no evidence of detrimental effects. Children of lesbian and gay parents are as well-adjusted overall as those of heterosexual parents. Specifically, research comparing children based on parental sexual orientation has not shown any differences in the development of gender identity, gender role development, or sexual orientation. Additionally, there were no differences between the children of lesbian or gay parents and those of heterosexual parents in separation-individuation, behavior problems, self-concept, locus of control, moral judgment, school adjustment, intelligence, victimization, and substance use. Further, research has consistently found that children and adolescents of gay and lesbian parents report normal social relationships with family members, peers, and other adults. Patterson concluded that there is no evidence to support legal discrimination or policy bias against lesbian and 282 gay parents. Armed with this evidence, lawyers from the ACLU advocate that gay and lesbian couples have the same legal rights as heterosexual couples when adopting children (“LGBTQ Parenting,” 2016). Read more. COVID-19 Deaths and Orphanhood As of January 2023, 1,414 American children under 18 died from COVID-19 related causes (click here for up-to-date total). Thousands more were hospitalized but the exact number is not available. As of November 2022, an estimated 214,545 American children (0-17 years) lost at least one parent from COVID-19 related causes (Figure 11-2); 0.1% or 214 children lost both parents (Unwin et al., 2022). This is a 110% increase in the number of children who typically lose a parent each year. Although they represent 14% of the U.S. population, 20% of children who lost a parent to COVID-19 were Black (Kidman et al., 2021). The number of children orphaned by COVID-19 will continue to grow, and the aftermath of parental death will affect many aspects of these children’s lives. Families were unprepared for this tragedy because the pandemic was sudden and unexpected. Children who lost a parent will require significant support as they navigate their grief. The difficulties they face are worsened by social isolation, lack of in-person schooling, and family financial stress. Many orphaned children will rely on school staff for emotional and educational support schools because few other social supports may exist for them. Figure 11-2. Number of children orphaned over the course of the pandemic (source with most recent data). 283 Disruptions in Family Life As the aftermath of the pandemic illustrates, the health and wellbeing of children depends on the health and wellbeing of the adults in their lives. Each year 1 out of every 15 children is exposed to domestic violence (NCADV | National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, n.d.). A majority of children will experience the divorce or separation of their parents before age 18 (Anderson, 2014). Divorce and parental separation create stress for children and increase risk for internalizing and externalizing disorders. Some children do better than others after divorce and risk is related to loss of contact and lower quality relationships with parents. (Be aware that studies that report statistics may not consider potential benefits of reduced contact with an abusive parent.) Parent-child relationships may be lower in quality after separation, as defined by hostility, loss of warmth, and less supervision of the child. When parents are stressed they may step out of the parent role and inappropriately confide in the child, use the child for emotional support or triangulate the child into parent conflict (van Dijk et al., 2020). Meta-analyses indicate that the impact of divorce on children with respect to health outcomes is small but statistically significant (van Dijk et al., 2020). The small effect is among children overall as some are greatly affected whereas the transition is easier for others. Other changes that accompany the divorce such as moving to a new home in another neighborhood, changing schools and losing friends also cause grief and stress. Those working with children should be aware of these risks and assess how individual children and parents are coping with the circumstances of their lives. Is cohabitation and remarriage more difficult for children than divorce? The remarriage of a parent may be a more difficult adjustment for a child than the original divorce (Seccombe & Warner, 2004). Biological parents are more likely to continue to be involved with their children jointly when neither parent has remarried. They are least likely to jointly be involved if the father has remarried and the mother has not. Cohabitation can be disrupting to children because cohabiting relationships in the United States tend to be short-lived. About 50 percent last less than 2 years (Brown, 2000). The child who starts a relationship with the parent's live-in partner may have to sever this relationship later. Even in long-term relationships, continued contact between stepparents and children is rare. Parental Incarceration As you will learn in later chapters, criminal offending peaks in early adulthood. Only 7% of those in state, and 11% of those in Federal custody are 55 or older (BOP Statistics: Average Inmate Age, n.d.; Jail Inmates in 2020 – Statistical Tables, n.d.). The demographics of offenders indicate that they are of childbearing and parenting age. Indeed, about half of those in custody are parents with children under 18 (Murray et al., 2012). According to The National Resource Center on Children and Families of the Incarcerated “On any given day, an estimated 2.7 million children in America have at least one parent in prison or jail” (The National Resource Center on Children and 284 Families of the Incarcerated, n.d.). Incarceration rates went down during the pandemic; prior to that, parental incarceration peaked for Millennials. One in 25 White children and one in four Black children born in 1990 had experienced parental imprisonment by their 14th birthday (Murray et al., 2012). Many children have little or no contact with incarcerated parents because 62% of parents in state prisons and 84% of parents in federal prisons are held over 100 miles away from their residence; 43% of parents in federal prisons are held over 500 miles away from their last residence. Many children with incarcerated mothers are placed in foster care or are cared for by relatives, most commonly grandmothers; most with incarcerated fathers are cared for by their mothers (Fact Sheets – The National Resource Center on Children and Families of the Incarcerated, n.d.; Murray et al., 2012). Children’s experiences prior to parental incarceration vary. Nearly half of offenders have substance use and/or mental health issues. Children often directly witness the arrest of their parent and arresting officers can surprise the family in the night and have weapons drawn (Murray et al., 2012). Children not witnessing the arrest may not know their parent is in custody. Caregivers may not tell them the truth about why their parent is absent, hoping to spare the child. It is usually best to provide age-appropriate accurate information to the child rather than lie or tell a partial truth (Murray et al., 2012). A recent comprehensive meta-analysis found that children of incarcerated parents are at increased risk for externalizing behavior problems (Murray et al