Hamlet Fragments Original and Modern Text PDF

Hamlet fragments Act 1 Scene 2: Gertrude and Claudius urge Hamlet to cease grieving for the death of his father. CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS.... And now, Hamlet, my nephew and my … But now, my cousin Hamlet, and my son—...

Hamlet fragments Act 1 Scene 2: Gertrude and Claudius urge Hamlet to cease grieving for the death of his father. CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS.... And now, Hamlet, my nephew and my … But now, my cousin Hamlet, and my son— son— HAMLET HAMLET 65 (aside) A little more than kin and less than (speaking so no one else can hear) Too kind. many family ties there for me. CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS Why are you still so gloomy, with a cloud How is it that the clouds still hang on you? hanging over you? HAMLET HAMLET Not so, my lord. I am too much i' the sun. It’s not true, sir. Your son is out in the sun. GERTRUDE Good Hamlet, cast thy nighted color off, GERTRUDE And let thine eye look like a friend on My dear Hamlet, stop wearing these black Denmark. clothes, and be friendly to the king. You 70 Do not forever with thy vailèd lids can’t spend your whole life with your eyes Seek for thy noble father in the dust. to the ground remembering your noble Thou know’st ’tis common. All that lives must father. It happens all the time, what lives die, must die eventually, passing to eternity. Passing through nature to eternity. HAMLET HAMLET Ay, madam, it is common. Yes, mother, it happens all the time. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE If it be, So why does it seem so particular to you? 75 Why seems it so particular with thee? HAMLET HAMLET “Seem,” mother? No, it is. I don’t know “Seems,” madam? Nay, it is. I know not what you mean by “seem.” Neither my “seems.” black clothes, my dear mother, nor my 'Tis not alone my inky cloak, good mother, heavy sighs, nor my weeping, nor my Nor customary suits of solemn black, downcast eyes, nor any other display of Nor windy suspiration of forced breath, grief can show what I really feel. It’s true 80 No, nor the fruitful river in the eye, that all these things “seem” like grief, since Nor the dejected 'havior of the visage, a person could use them to fake grief if he 1 Together with all forms, moods, shapes of wanted to. But I’ve got more real grief grief, inside me that you could ever see on the That can denote me truly. These indeed surface. These clothes are just a hint of it. “seem,” For they are actions that a man might play. 85 But I have that within which passeth show, These but the trappings and the suits of woe. CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS 'Tis sweet and commendable in your nature, Hamlet, you are so sweet and such a good Hamlet, son to mourn your father like this. But you To give these mourning duties to your father. have to remember, that your father lost his But you must know your father lost a father, father, who lost his father before him, and 90 That father lost, lost his, and the survivor every time, each son has had to mourn his bound father for a certain period. But overdoing it In filial obligation for some term is just stubborn. It’s not manly. It’s not what To do obsequious sorrow. But to persever God wants, and it betrays a vulnerable In obstinate condolement is a course heart and an ignorant and weak mind. Of impious stubbornness. 'Tis unmanly grief. Since we know that everyone must die 95 It shows a will most incorrect to heaven, sooner or later, why should we take it to A heart unfortified, a mind impatient, heart? You’re committing a crime against An understanding simple and unschooled. heaven, against the dead, and against For what we know must be and is as common nature. And it’s irrational, since the truth is As any the most vulgar thing to sense, that all fathers must die. Please give up 100 Why should we in our peevish opposition this useless mourning of yours and start Take it to heart? Fie! 'Tis a fault to heaven, thinking of me as your new father. A fault against the dead, a fault to nature, Because everyone knows that you are the To reason most absurd, whose common man closest to this throne, and I love you theme just as much as any father loves his son. Is death of fathers, and who still hath cried, And your plans for going back to 105 From the first corse till he that died today, Wittenberg are not what I want. I’m asking “This must be so.” We pray you, throw to you now to stay here in my company as earth the number-one member of my court, my This unprevailing woe, and think of us nephew and now my son too. As of a father. For let the world take note, You are the most immediate to our throne, 110 And with no less nobility of love Than that which dearest father bears his son Do I impart toward you. For your intent In going back to school in Wittenberg, It is most retrograde to our desire. 115 And we beseech you, bend you to remain Here in the cheer and comfort of our eye, Our chiefest courtier, cousin, and our son. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE Let not thy mother lose her prayers, Hamlet. Please answer my prayers, Hamlet, and I pray thee, stay with us. Go not to stay with us. Don’t go back to Wittenberg. Wittenberg. 2 HAMLET HAMLET 120 I shall in all my best obey you, madam. I’ll obey you as well as I can, ma'am. CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS Why, ’tis a loving and a fair reply. That’s the right answer—it shows your Be as ourself in Denmark.—Madam, come. love. Stay in Denmark like us.—My dear This gentle and unforced accord of Hamlet wife, come. Hamlet’s agreeing to stay Sits smiling to my heart, in grace whereof makes me happy, and every merry toast 125 No jocund health that Denmark drinks I’ll drink today will be heard as far as the today clouds overhead. My drinking will be But the great cannon to the clouds shall tell, echoed in the heavens. Let’s go. And the king’s rouse the heavens shall bruit again, Respeaking earthly thunder. Come away. FLOURISH. EXEUNT ALL BUT TRUMPETS PLAY. EVERYONE HAMLET EXCEPT HAMLET EXITS. HAMLET HAMLET Oh, that this too, too sullied flesh would melt, Ah, I wish my dirty flesh could melt 130 Thaw, and resolve itself into a dew, away into a vapor, or that God had not Or that the Everlasting had not fixed made a law against suicide. Oh God, His canon 'gainst self-slaughter! O God, God! God! How tired, stale, and pointless life How weary, stale, flat, and unprofitable is to me. Damn it! It’s like a garden that Seem to me all the uses of this world! no one’s taking care of, and that’s 135 Fie on ’t, ah fie! 'Tis an unweeded garden growing wild. Only nasty weeds grow in That grows to seed. Things rank and gross in it now. I can’t believe it’s come to this. nature Possess it merely. That it should come My father’s only been dead for two to this. But two months dead—nay, not so months—no, not even two. Such an much, not two.So excellent a king, that was to excellent king, as superior to my uncle this as a god is to a beast, and so loving 140 Hyperion to a satyr. So loving to my toward my mother that he kept the wind mother from blowing too hard on her face. That he might not beteem the winds of heaven Oh God, do I have to remember that? Visit her face too roughly.—Heaven and earth, She would hang on to him, and the Must I remember? Why, she would hang on more she was with him the more she him wanted to be with him; she couldn’t get As if increase of appetite had grown enough of him. Yet even so, within a 145 By what it fed on, and yet, within a month of my father’s death (I don’t even month— want to think about it. Oh women! You Let me not think on ’t. Frailty, thy name is are so weak!), even before she had woman!— broken in the shoes she wore to his A little month, or ere those shoes were old funeral, crying like crazy—even an With which she followed my poor father’s animal would have mourned its mate body, longer than she did!—there she was Like Niobe, all tears. Why she, even she— marrying my uncle, my father’s brother, 150 O God, a beast that wants discourse of who’s about as much like my father as reason I’m like Hercules. Less than a month Would have mourned longer!—married with after my father’s death, even before the my uncle, tears on her cheeks had dried, she My father’s brother, but no more like my father remarried. Oh, so quick to jump into a Than I to Hercules. Within a month, bed of incest! That’s not good, and no Ere yet the salt of most unrighteous tears good can come of it either. But my heart 3  155 Had left the flushing in her gallèd eyes, must break in silence, since I can’t She married. O most wicked speed, to post mention my feelings aloud. With such dexterity to incestuous sheets! It is not nor it cannot come to good, But break, my heart, for I must hold my tongue. Act 1 Scene 3: In the meantime Polonius and Laertes advise Ophelia against falling in love with Hamlet as Laertes prepares to leave for France. ENTER LAERTES AND OPHELIA, HIS LAERTES AND HIS SISTER SISTER OPHELIA ENTER. LAERTES LAERTES My belongings are on the ship already. My necessaries are embarked. Farewell. Good-bye. And, my dear sister, as And, sister, as the winds give benefit long as the winds are blowing and And convey is assistant, do not sleep, ships are sailing, let me hear from But let me hear from you. you—write. OPHELIA OPHELIA Do you doubt that? Do you doubt I’ll write? LAERTES LAERTES 5 For Hamlet and the trifling of his favor, As for Hamlet and his attentions to Hold it a fashion and a toy in blood, you, just consider it a big flirtation, the A violet in the youth of primy nature, temporary phase of a hot-blooded Forward, not permanent, sweet, not lasting, youth. It won’t last. It’s sweet, but his The perfume and suppliance of a minute. affection will fade after a minute. Not a 10 No more. second more. OPHELIA OPHELIA No more but so? No more than a minute? 4 LAERTES LAERTES Think it no more. Try to think of it like that, anyway. For nature, crescent, does not grow alone When a youth grows into a man, he In thews and bulk, but, as this temple waxes, doesn’t just get bigger in his body—his The inward service of the mind and soul responsibilities grow too. He may love Grows wide withal. Perhaps he loves you now, you now, and may have only the best 15 And now no soil nor cautel doth besmirch intentions, but you have to be on your The virtue of his will, but you must fear. guard. Remember that he belongs to His greatness weighed, his will is not his own, the royal family, and his intentions For he himself is subject to his birth. don’t matter that much—he’s a slave He may not, as unvalued persons do, to his family obligations. He can’t 20 Carve for himself, for on his choice simply make personal choices for depends himself the way common people can, The safety and health of this whole state. since the whole country depends on And therefore must his choice be what he does. His choice has to agree circumscribed with what the nation wants. Unto the voice and yielding of that body So if he says he loves you, you should Whereof he is the head. Then if he says he be wise enough to see that his words loves you, only mean as much as the state of 25 It fits your wisdom so far to believe it Denmark allows them to mean. Then As he in his particular act and place think about how shameful it would be May give his saying deed, which is no further for you to give in to his seductive talk Than the main voice of Denmark goes withal. and surrender your treasure chest to Then weigh what loss your honor may sustain his greedy hands. Watch out, Ophelia. 30If with too credent ear you list his songs, Just keep your love under control, and Or lose your heart, or your chaste treasure don’t let yourself become a target of open his lust. Simply exposing your beauty To his unmastered importunity. to the moon at night is risky Fear it, Ophelia. Fear it, my dear sister, enough—you don’t have to expose And keep you in the rear of your affection, yourself to him. Even good girls 35 Out of the shot and danger of desire. sometimes get a bad reputation. The chariest maid is prodigal enough Worms ruin flowers before they If she unmask her beauty to the moon. blossom. Baby blooms are most Virtue itself ’scapes not calumnious strokes. susceptible to disease. So be careful. The canker galls the infants of the spring Fear will keep you safe. Young people 40 Too oft before their buttons be disclosed. often lose their self-control even And in the morn and liquid dew of youth, without any help from others. 5  Contagious blastments are most imminent. Be wary, then. Best safety lies in fear. Youth to itself rebels, though none else near. OPHELIA OPHELIA 45 I shall the effect of this good lesson keep I’ll keep your words of wisdom close to As watchman to my heart. But, good my brother, my heart. But, my dear brother, don’t be Do not, as some ungracious pastors do, like a bad priest who fails to practice Show me the steep and thorny way to heaven what he preaches, showing me the Whiles, like a puffed and reckless libertine, steep and narrow way to heaven while 50 Himself the primrose path of dalliance treads you frolic on the primrose path of sin. And recks not his own rede. LAERTES LAERTES O, fear me not. Don’t worry, I won’t. ENTER POLONIUS POLONIUS ENTERS. I stay too long. But here my father comes. I’ve been here too long. And here A double blessing is a double grace. comes father. What good luck, to have Occasion smiles upon a second leave. him bless my leaving not once but twice. POLONIUS POLONIUS 55 Yet here, Laertes? Aboard, aboard, for shame! You’re still here? Shame on you—get The wind sits in the shoulder of your sail on board! The wind is filling your ship’s And you are stayed for. There, my blessing with sail, and they’re waiting for you. Here, I thee. give you my blessing again. And just try And these few precepts in thy memory to remember a few rules of life. Don’t Look thou character. Give thy thoughts no say what you’re thinking, and don’t be tongue, too quick to act on what you think. Be 60 Nor any unproportioned thought his act. friendly to people but don’t overdo it. Be thou familiar but by no means vulgar. Once you’ve tested out your friends and 6 Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried, found them trustworthy, hold onto them. Grapple them unto thy soul with hoops of steel, But don’t waste your time shaking But do not dull thy palm with entertainment hands with every new guy you meet. 65 Of each new-hatched, unfledged comrade. Don’t be quick to pick a fight, but once Beware you’re in one, hold your own. Listen to Of entrance to a quarrel, but being in, many people, but talk to few. Hear Bear ’t that th' opposèd may beware of thee. everyone’s opinion, but reserve your Give every man thy ear but few thy voice. judgment. Spend all you can afford on Take each man’s censure but reserve thy clothes, but make sure they’re quality, judgment. not flashy, since clothes make the 70 Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy, man—which is doubly true in France. But not expressed in fancy—rich, not gaudy, Don’t borrow money and don’t lend it, For the apparel oft proclaims the man, since when you lend to a friend, you And they in France of the best rank and station often lose the friendship as well as the Are of a most select and generous chief in that. money, and borrowing turns a person 75 Neither a borrower nor a lender be, into a spendthrift. And, above all, be For loan oft loses both itself and friend, true to yourself. Then you won’t be And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry. false to anybody else. Good-bye, son. I This above all: to thine own self be true, hope my blessing will help you absorb And it must follow, as the night the day, what I’ve said. 80 Thou canst not then be false to any man. Farewell. My blessing season this in thee. LAERTES LAERTES Most humbly do I take my leave, my lord. I humbly say good-bye to you, father. POLONIUS POLONIUS Now go, the time is right. Your servants The time invites you. Go. Your servants tend. are waiting. LAERTES LAERTES Farewell, Ophelia, and remember well Good-bye, Ophelia. Remember what I’ve 85 What I have said to you. told you. 7 OPHELIA OPHELIA 'Tis in my memory locked, It’s locked away in my memory, and And you yourself shall keep the key of it. you’ve got the key. LAERTES LAERTES Farewell. Good-bye. EXIT LAERTES LAERTES EXITS. POLONIUS POLONIUS What is ’t, Ophelia, he hath said to you? What did he tell you, Ophelia? OPHELIA OPHELIA So please you, something touching the Lord Something about Hamlet. Hamlet. POLONIUS POLONIUS A good thing he did, by God. I’ve heard 90 Marry, well bethought. Hamlet’s been spending a lot of time 'Tis told me he hath very oft of late alone with you recently, and you’ve made Given private time to you, and you yourself yourself quite available to him. If things Have of your audience been most free and are the way people tell me they are—and bounteous. they’re only telling me this to warn If it be so as so ’tis put on me— me—then I have to say, you’re not 95 And that in way of caution—I must tell you, conducting yourself with the self-restraint You do not understand yourself so clearly a daughter of mine should show. What’s As it behooves my daughter and your honor. going on between you two? Tell me the What is between you? Give me up the truth. truth. 8 OPHELIA OPHELIA He hath, my lord, of late made many tenders He’s offered me a lot of affection lately. 100 Of his affection to me. POLONIUS POLONIUS “Affection!” That’s nothing! You’re talking Affection! Pooh, you speak like a green girl, like some innocent girl who doesn’t Unsifted in such perilous circumstance. understand the ways of the world. Do you Do you believe his “tenders,” as you call them? believe his “offers,” as you call them? OPHELIA OPHELIA I do not know, my lord, what I should think. I don’t know what to believe, father. POLONIUS POLONIUS 105 Marry, I’ll teach you. Think yourself a baby Then I’ll tell you. Believe that you are a That you have ta'en these tenders for true pay, foolish little baby for believing these Which are not sterling. Tender yourself more “offers” are something real. Offer yourself dearly, more respect, or—not to beat this word to Or—not to crack the wind of the poor phrase, death—you’ll offer me the chance to be a Running it thus—you’ll tender me a fool. laughing-stock. OPHELIA OPHELIA 110 My lord, he hath importuned me with love Father, he’s always talked about love in In honorable fashion. an honorable fashion— POLONIUS POLONIUS Ay, “fashion” you may call it. Go to, go to. Yes, “fashion” is just the word—a passing whim. Go on. OPHELIA And hath given countenance to his speech, my OPHELIA lord, And he’s made the holiest vows to me, to With almost all the holy vows of heaven. back up what he says. 9 POLONIUS POLONIUS 115 Ay, springes to catch woodcocks. I do know, These vows are just traps for stupid birds. When the blood burns, how prodigal the soul I know when a man is on fire, he’ll swear Lends the tongue vows. These blazes, anything. But when a heart’s on fire, it daughter, gives out more light than heat, and the Giving more light than heat, extinct in both fire will be out even before he’s done Even in their promise as it is a-making, making his promises. Don’t mistake that 120 You must not take for fire. From this time for true love. From now on, spend a little Be somewhat scanter of your maiden presence. less time with him and talk to him less. Set your entreatments at a higher rate Make yourself a precious commodity. Than a command to parley. For Lord Hamlet, Remember that Hamlet is young and has Believe so much in him that he is young, a lot more freedom to fool around than 125 And with a larger tether may he walk you do. In short, Ophelia, don’t believe Than may be given you. In few, Ophelia, his love vows, since they’re like flashy Do not believe his vows, for they are brokers pimps who wear nice clothes to lead a Not of that dye which their investments show, woman into filthy acts. To put it plainly, But mere implorators of unholy suits, don’t waste your time with Hamlet. Do as 130 Breathing like sanctified and pious bawds, I say. The better to beguile. This is for all: Now come along. I would not, in plain terms, from this time forth, Have you so slander any moment leisure, As to give words or talk with the Lord Hamlet. 135 Look to ’t, I charge you. Come your ways. OPHELIA OPHELIA I shall obey, my lord. I’ll do as you say, father. Act 1 Scene 5: Hamlet meets the ghost on the walls of Elsinore castle ENTER GHOST AND HAMLET THE GHOST AND HAMLET ENTER. HAMLET HAMLET Where wilt thou lead me? Speak, I’ll go no Where are you taking me? Speak. I’m not further. going any farther. 10 GHOST GHOST Mark me. Listen to me. HAMLET HAMLET I will. I will. GHOST GHOST My hour is almost come The hour has almost come when I have to When I to sulfurous and tormenting flames return to the horrible flames of purgatory. Must render up myself. HAMLET HAMLET Alas, poor ghost! Ah, poor ghost! GHOST GHOST 5 Pity me not, but lend thy serious hearing Don’t pity me. Just listen carefully to what I To what I shall unfold. have to tell you. HAMLET HAMLET Speak. I am bound to hear. Speak. I’m ready to hear you. GHOST GHOST You must be ready for revenge, too, when So art thou to revenge when thou shalt hear. you hear me out. HAMLET HAMLET What? What? 11 GHOST I am thy father’s spirit, 10 Doomed for a certain term to walk the night GHOST And for the day confined to fast in fires, I’m the ghost of your father, doomed for a Till the foul crimes done in my days of certain period of time to walk the earth at nature night, while during the day I’m trapped in Are burnt and purged away. But that I am the fires of purgatory until I’ve done forbid penance for my past sins. If I weren’t To tell the secrets of my prison house, forbidden to tell you the secrets of 15 I could a tale unfold whose lightest word purgatory, I could tell you stories that would Would harrow up thy soul, freeze thy young slice through your soul, freeze your blood, blood, make your eyes jump out of their sockets, Make thy two eyes, like stars, start from and your hair stand on end like porcupine their spheres, quills. But mortals like you aren’t allowed to Thy knotted and combinèd locks to part hear this description of the afterlife. Listen, And each particular hair to stand on end, listen! If you ever loved your poor dear 20Like quills upon the fearful porpentine. father— But this eternal blazon must not be To ears of flesh and blood. List, list, O, list! If thou didst ever thy dear father love— HAMLET HAMLET O God! Oh God! GHOST GHOST 25 Revenge his foul and most unnatural Take revenge for his horrible murder, that murder. crime against nature. HAMLET HAMLET Murder? Murder? 12  GHOST GHOST His most horrible murder. Murder’s always Murder most foul, as in the best it is. horrible, but this one was especially horrible, But this most foul, strange and unnatural. weird, and unnatural. HAMLET HAMLET Haste me to know ’t, that I, with wings as swift Hurry and tell me about it, so I can take 30 As meditation or the thoughts of love, revenge right away, faster than a person May sweep to my revenge. falls in love. GHOST GHOST I find thee apt, I’m glad you’re eager. You’d have to be as And duller shouldst thou be than the fat weed lazy as a weed on the shores of Lethe not to That roots itself in ease on Lethe wharf, get riled up here. Now listen, Hamlet. Wouldst thou not stir in this. Now, Hamlet, Everyone was told that a poisonous snake hear. bit me when I was sleeping in the orchard. 35 'Tis given out that, sleeping in my orchard, But in fact, that’s a lie that’s fooled everyone A serpent stung me. So the whole ear of in Denmark. You should know, my noble Denmark son, the real snake that stung your father is Is by a forgèd process of my death now wearing his crown. Rankly abused. But know, thou noble youth, The serpent that did sting thy father’s life 40 Now wears his crown. HAMLET HAMLET I knew it! My uncle? O my prophetic soul! My uncle? GHOST GHOST Yes, that incestuous, adulterous animal. Ay, that incestuous, that adulterate beast, With his clever words and fancy gifts, he With witchcraft of his wit, with traitorous seduced my seemingly virtuous queen, gifts— persuading her to give in to his lust. They O wicked wit and gifts, that have the power were evil words and gifts to seduce her like 45 So to seduce!—won to his shameful lust that! Oh, Hamlet, how far she fell! She went The will of my most seeming-virtuous queen. from me, who loved her with the dignity and O Hamlet, what a falling off was there! devotion that suits a legitimate marriage, to From me, whose love was of that dignity a wretch whose natural gifts were poor That it went hand in hand even with the vow compared to mine. But just as you can’t 13 50 I made to her in marriage, and to decline corrupt a truly virtuous person no matter Upon a wretch whose natural gifts were poor how you try, the opposite is also true: a To those of mine. lustful person like her can satisfy herself in a But virtue, as it never will be moved, heavenly union and then move on to Though lewdness court it in a shape of garbage. But hang on, I think I smell the heaven, morning air. So let me be brief here. Your 55 So lust, though to a radiant angel linked, uncle snuck up to me while I was sleeping in Will sate itself in a celestial bed the orchard, as I always used to do in the And prey on garbage. afternoon, and poured a vial of henbane But soft! Methinks I scent the morning air. poison into my ear—that poison that moves Brief let me be. Sleeping within my orchard, like quicksilver through the veins and 60 My custom always of the afternoon, curdles the blood, which is just what it did to Upon my secure hour thy uncle stole me. I broke out in a scaly rash that covered With juice of cursed hebenon in a vial, my smooth body with a revolting crust. And And in the porches of my ears did pour that’s how my brother robbed me of my life, The leperous distilment, whose effect my crown, and my queen all at once. He cut 65 Holds such an enmity with blood of man me off in the middle of a sinful life. That swift as quicksilver it courses through I had no chance to repent my sins or receive The natural gates and alleys of the body last rites. Oh, it’s horrible, horrible, so And with a sudden vigor doth posset horrible! If you are human, don’t stand for it. And curd, like eager droppings into milk, Don’t let the Danish king’s bed be a nest of 70 The thin and wholesome blood. So did it incest. But however you go about your mine. revenge, don’t corrupt your mind or do any And a most instant tetter barked about, harm to your mother. Leave her to God and Most lazar-like, with vile and loathsome crust her own guilt. Now, good-bye. The All my smooth body. glowworm’s light is beginning to fade, so Thus was I, sleeping, by a brother’s hand morning is near. Good-bye, good-bye, 75 Of life, of crown, of queen at once good-bye. Remember me. dispatched, Cut off even in the blossoms of my sin, Unhouseled, disappointed, unaneled. No reckoning made, but sent to my account With all my imperfections on my head. 80 Oh, horrible, oh, horrible, most horrible! If thou hast nature in thee, bear it not. Let not the royal bed of Denmark be A couch for luxury and damnèd incest. 14 But howsoever thou pursuest this act, 85 Taint not thy mind, nor let thy soul contrive Against thy mother aught. Leave her to heaven And to those thorns that in her bosom lodge To prick and sting her. Fare thee well at once. The glowworm shows the matin to be near, 90 And 'gins to pale his uneffectual fire. Adieu, adieu, adieu. Remember me. EXIT THE GHOST EXITS HAMLET HAMLET O all you host of heaven! O earth! What else? Ah, all you up in heaven! And earth! What And shall I couple hell? Oh, fie! Hold, hold, my else? Shall I include hell as well? Damn it! heart, Keep beating, my heart, and muscles, don’t And you, my sinews, grow not instant old, grow old yet—keep me standing. Remember 95 But bear me stiffly up. Remember thee! you! Yes, you poor ghost, as long as I have Ay, thou poor ghost, whiles memory holds a seat any power of memory in this distracted In this distracted globe. Remember thee! head. Remember you! Yes, I’ll wipe my mind Yea, from the table of my memory clean of all trivial facts and memories and I’ll wipe away all trivial fond records, preserve only your commandment there. 100 All saws of books, all forms, all pressures Yes, by God! Oh, you evil woman! Oh, you past villain, villain, you damned, smiling villain! That youth and observation copied there, Where’s my notebook?—It’s a good idea for And thy commandment all alone shall live Within the book and volume of my brain, me to write down that one can smile and Unmixed with baser matter. Yes, by heaven! smile, and be a villain. At least it’s possible 105 O most pernicious woman! in Denmark. (he writes) So, uncle, there you O villain, villain, smiling, damnèd villain! are. Now it’s time to deal with the vow I My tables!—Meet it is I set it down made to my father. That one may smile, and smile, and be a He said, “Remember me.” I swore I would. villain. At least I’m sure it may be so in Denmark. (writes) 110 So, uncle, there you are. Now to my word. It is “Adieu, adieu. Remember me.” I have sworn ’t. 15 Act 2 Scene 1: Ophelia reports to her father about Hamlet’s odd behaviour during their recent encounter. POLONIUS POLONIUS How now, Ophelia? What’s the matter? Ophelia, what’s the matter? OPHELIA OPHELIA 75 O my lord, my lord, I have been so Oh, father, father, I’ve just had such a affrighted! scare! POLONIUS POLONIUS With what, i' th' name of God? From what, in God’s name? OPHELIA OPHELIA My lord, as I was sewing in my closet, Father, I was up in my room sewing when Lord Hamlet, with his doublet all unbraced; Hamlet came in with no hat on his head, his No hat upon his head; his stockings fouled, shirt unbuttoned, and his stockings dirty, 80 Ungartered, and down-gyvèd to his ankle; undone, and down around his ankles. He Pale as his shirt; his knees knocking each was pale as his undershirt, and his knees other; were knocking together. He looked so out of And with a look so piteous in purport sorts, as if he’d just come back from hell. As if he had been loosèd out of hell He came up to me. To speak of horrors—he comes before me. POLONIUS POLONIUS 85 Mad for thy love? Is he crazy with love for you? 16 OPHELIA OPHELIA My lord, I do not know. I’m not sure, but I’m afraid he might be. But truly, I do fear it. POLONIUS POLONIUS What said he? What did he say? OPHELIA OPHELIA He took me by the wrist and held me hard. He grabbed me by the wrist and held me Then goes he to the length of all his arm, hard, then backed away an arm’s length And, with his other hand thus o'er his brow, and just looked at me, staring at me like an 90 He falls to such perusal of my face artist about to paint my picture. He stayed As he would draw it. Long stayed he so. like that a long time. At last, a little shaking of mine arm Finally, after shaking my arm a little, and And thrice his head thus waving up and down, jerking his head up and down three times, He raised a sigh so piteous and profound he sighed like it was his last breath. After 95 As it did seem to shatter all his bulk that he let me go. He left the room with his And end his being. That done, he lets me go, head turned back on me, finding his way And, with his head over his shoulder turned, out without looking, since his eyes were on He seemed to find his way without his eyes, me the whole time. For out o' doors he went without their helps, 100 And to the last bended their light on me. POLONIUS POLONIUS Come, go with me. I will go seek the king. Come with me. I’ll go tell the king about This is the very ecstasy of love, this. This is definitely love-craziness. Love Whose violent property fordoes itself is such a violent emotion that it makes And leads the will to desperate undertakings people self-destruct, as much as any strong 105 As oft as any passion under heaven emotion. I’m so sorry. Did you tell him That does afflict our natures. I am sorry. anything that might have hurt his feelings 17 What, have you given him any hard words of lately? late? OPHELIA OPHELIA No, my good lord. But as you did command No, father, but I did what you told me to do I did repel his fetters and denied and sent back his letters and wouldn’t let 110 His access to me. him visit me. POLONIUS POLONIUS That hath made him mad. That’s what made him crazy. I regret not I am sorry that with better heed and judgment observing him more closely before I told I had not quoted him. I feared he did but trifle you to do that. I thought he was just toying And meant to wreck thee. But beshrew my with you and meant to ruin your reputation. jealousy! Damn my suspicious thoughts! It’s as By heaven, it is as proper to our age common for us old people to assume we 115 To cast beyond ourselves in our opinions know more than we do as for young people As it is common for the younger sort to be too wild and crazy. Come on, let’s go To lack discretion. Come, go we to the king. see the king. We’ve got to discuss this This must be known, which, being kept close, matter, which could cause more trouble if might move we keep it secret than if we discuss it More grief to hide than hate to utter love. openly. 120 Come. Act 2 Scene 2: Polonius proposes a plan to Claudius to confirm the reason of Hamlet’s odd behaviour. POLONIUS POLONIUS This business is well ended. Well, that turned out well in the end. Sir and My liege and madam, to expostulate madam, to make grand speeches about what 18 What majesty should be, what duty is, majesty is, what service is, or why day is day, 90 Why day is day, night night, and time is night is night, and time is time is just a waste time, of a lot of day, night, and time. Therefore, Were nothing but to waste night, day, and since the essence of wisdom is not talking too time. much, I’ll get right to the point here. Your son Therefore, since brevity is the soul of wit is crazy. “Crazy” I’m calling it, since how can And tediousness the limbs and outward you say what craziness is except to say that flourishes, it’s craziness? But that’s another story. I will be brief: your noble son is mad. 95 Mad call I it, for, to define true madness, What is ’t but to be nothing else but mad? But let that go. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE More matter, with less art. Please, stick to the point. POLONIUS POLONIUS Madam, I swear I use no art at all. Madam, I’m doing nothing but sticking to the 100 That he is mad, ’tis true. Tis true, ’tis pity, point. It’s true he’s crazy, and it’s a shame it’s And pity ’tis ’tis true—a foolish figure, true, and it’s truly a shame he’s crazy—but But farewell it, for I will use no art. now I sound foolish, so I’ll get right to the Mad let us grant him then. And now remains point. That we find out the cause of this effect, Now, if we agree Hamlet’s crazy, then the next 105 Or rather say, the cause of this defect, step is to figure out the cause of this effect of For this effect defective comes by cause. craziness, or I suppose I should say the Thus it remains, and the remainder thus. cause of this defect, since this defective effect Perpend. is caused by something. This is what we must I have a daughter—have while she is mine— do, and that’s exactly what needs to be done. Who in her duty and obedience, mark, Think about it. I have a daughter (I have her 110 Hath given me this. Now gather and until she gets married) who’s given me this 19 surmise. letter, considering it her duty. Listen and think (reads a letter) “To the celestial and my soul’s about this: (he reads a letter) “To the heavenly idol, the most beautified Ophelia”—That’s an idol of my soul, the most beautified ill phrase, a vile phrase. “Beautified” is a vile Ophelia”—By the way, “beautified” sounds phrase. But you shall hear. Thus: (reads the bad, it sounds awful, it sounds crude, it’s a letter)“In her excellent white bosom, these,” terrible use of the word. But I’ll go on: (he etc.— reads the letter) “In her excellent white bosom,” et cetera, et cetera—you don’t need to hear all this stuff— GERTRUDE GERTRUDE Came this from Hamlet to her? Hamlet wrote this letter to Ophelia? POLONIUS POLONIUS Good madam, stay a while. I will be faithful. Madam, please be patient. I’ll read it to you. (reads the letter) (he reads the letter) “Doubt thou the stars are fire, “You may wonder if the stars are fire, Doubt that the sun doth move, You may wonder if the sun moves across Doubt truth to be a liar, the sky. But never doubt I love. You may wonder if the truth is a liar, O dear Ophelia, I am ill at these numbers. I But never wonder if I love. have not art to reckon my groans, but that I Oh, Ophelia, I’m bad at poetry. I can’t put my love thee best, oh, most best, believe it. feelings into verse, but please believe I love Adieu. you best, oh, best of all. Believe it. Thine evermore, most dear lady, Yours forever, my dearest one, whilst this machine is to him, as long as I live—still chugging along, Hamlet.” Hamlet.” 115 This in obedience hath my daughter Dutifully and obediently my daughter showed shown me, me this letter, and more like it. She’s told me And more above, hath his solicitings, all about how Hamlet has been courting 20 As they fell out by time, by means, and place, her—all the details of where, and what he All given to mine ear. said, and when. CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS But how hath she received his love? And how did she react to all this? POLONIUS POLONIUS 120 What do you think of me? Sir, what is your opinion of me? CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS As of a man faithful and honorable. I know you are loyal and honorable. POLONIUS POLONIUS I would fain prove so. But what might you I would like to prove to you that I am. But what think, would you have thought of me if I had kept When I had seen this hot love on the wing— quiet when I found out about this hot little love As I perceived it, I must tell you that, (which I noticed even before my daughter told 125 Before my daughter told me—what might me about it)? My dear queen, what would you you, have thought of me if I had turned a blind eye Or my dear majesty your queen here, think, to what was happening between Hamlet and If I had played the desk or table-book, my daughter? No, I had to do something. And Or given my heart a winking, mute and dumb, so I said to my daughter: “Lord Hamlet is a Or looked upon this love with idle sight? prince, he’s out of your league. You have to 130 What might you think? No, I went round end this.” And then I gave her orders to stay to work, away from him, and not to accept any And my young mistress thus I did bespeak: messages or little gifts from him. She did what “Lord Hamlet is a prince out of thy star. I said. When she rejected Hamlet, he became This must not be.” And then I prescripts gave sad, and stopped eating, stopped sleeping, her, got weak, got dizzy, and as a result lost his 21 That she should lock herself from his resort, mind. And that’s why he’s crazy now, and all 135 Admit no messengers, receive no tokens. of us feel sorry for him. Which done, she took the fruits of my advice; And he, repelled—a short tale to make— Fell into a sadness, then into a fast, Thence to a watch, thence into a weakness, 140 Thence to a lightness, and, by this declension, Into the madness wherein now he raves And all we mourn for. CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS (to GERTRUDE) Do you think that’s why (to GERTRUDE ) Do you think ’tis this? Hamlet’s crazy? GERTRUDE GERTRUDE It may be, very like. It may be, it certainly may be. POLONIUS POLONIUS Hath there been such a time—I would fain Has there ever been a time—I’d really like to know that— know—when I’ve definitely said something was 145 That I have positively said, “'Tis so,” true, and it turned out not to be true? When it proved otherwise? CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS Not that I know. Not that I know of. POLONIUS POLONIUS 22 (points to his head and shoulders) (pointing to his head and shoulders) Chop my Take this from this if this be otherwise. head off if I’m wrong. I’ll follow the clues and If circumstances lead me, I will find uncover the truth, even if it’s at the very center of 150Where truth is hid, though it were hid the earth. indeed Within the center. CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS How may we try it further? What can we do to find out if it’s true? POLONIUS POLONIUS You know sometimes he walks four hours Well, you know he sometimes walks here in the together lobby for four hours at a time. Here in the lobby. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE So he does indeed. Yes, he does. POLONIUS POLONIUS At such a time I’ll loose my daughter to him. When he’s there next time, I’ll send my daughter 155 (to CLAUDIUS) Be you and I behind an to see him. (to CLAUDIUS) You and I will hide arras then, behind the arras and watch what happens. If it Mark the encounter. If he love her not turns out that Hamlet’s not in love after all, and And be not from his reason fall'n thereon, hasn’t gone mad from love, then you can fire Let me be no assistant for a state me from my court job and I’ll go work on a farm. But keep a farm and carters. CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS 23  We will try it. We’ll try what you suggest. Act 3 Scene 1: A plan is about to be carried out for Ophelia to meet Hamlet. CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS Sweet Gertrude, leave us too, Dear Gertrude, please give us a moment alone. 30 For we have closely sent for Hamlet We’ve secretly arranged for Hamlet to come hither, here so that he can run into Ophelia. Her father That he, as ’twere by accident, may here and I, justifiably acting as spies, will hide in the Affront Ophelia. room and observe Hamlet’s behavior, to Her father and myself (lawful espials) determine whether it’s love that’s making him Will so bestow ourselves that, seeing unseen, suffer. 35 We may of their encounter frankly judge, And gather by him, as he is behaved, If ’t be the affliction of his love or no That thus he suffers for. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE I shall obey you. Yes, I’ll go. As for you, Ophelia, I hope that And for your part, Ophelia, I do wish your beauty is the reason for Hamlet’s insane 40 That your good beauties be the happy behavior, just as I hope your virtues will return cause him to normal some day, for the good of both of Of Hamlet’s wildness. So shall I hope your you. virtues Will bring him to his wonted way again, To both your honors. OPHELIA OPHELIA Madam, I wish it may. I hope so too, Madam. 24 EXIT GERTRUDE GERTRUDE EXITS. POLONIUS POLONIUS Ophelia, walk you here. (toCLAUDIUS) Ophelia, come here.—(to CLAUDIUS) Your Gracious, so please you, Majesty, we will hide. (to OPHELIA)—Read 45 We will bestow ourselves. from this prayer book, so it looks natural that (toOPHELIA)Read on this book you’re all alone. Come to think of it, this That show of such an exercise may color happens all the time—people act devoted to Your loneliness.—We are oft to blame in this, God to mask their bad deeds. 'Tis too much proved, that with devotion’s visage And pious action we do sugar o'er 50 The devil himself. CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS (aside) Oh, ’tis too true! (to himself) How right he is! His words whip up How smart a lash that speech doth give my my guilty feelings. The whore’s pockmarked conscience! cheek made pretty with make-up is just like the The harlot’s cheek, beautied with plastering ugly actions I’m disguising with fine words. art, What a terrible guilt I feel! Is not more ugly to the thing that helps it Than is my deed to my most painted word. 55 O heavy burden! POLONIUS POLONIUS I hear him coming. Let’s withdraw, my lord. I hear him coming. Quick, let’s hide, my lord. CLAUDIUS AND POLONIUS WITHDRAW CLAUDIUS AND POLONIUS HIDE. 25 ENTER HAMLET HAMLET ENTERS. HAMLET HAMLET To be, or not to be? That is the question— The question is: is it better to be alive or dead? Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer Is it nobler to put up with all the nasty things The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, that luck throws your way, or to fight against all 60 Or to take arms against a sea of troubles, those troubles by simply putting an end to them And, by opposing, end them? To die, to once and for all? Dying, sleeping—that’s all sleep— dying is—a sleep that ends all the heartache No more—and by a sleep to say we end and shocks that life on earth gives us—that’s The heartache and the thousand natural an achievement to wish for. To die, to sleep—to shocks sleep, maybe to dream. Ah, but there’s the That flesh is heir to—’tis a consummation catch: in death’s sleep who knows what kind of 65 Devoutly to be wished! To die, to sleep. dreams might come, after we’ve put the noise To sleep, perchance to dream—ay, there’s and commotion of life behind us. That’s the rub, certainly something to worry about. That’s the For in that sleep of death what dreams may consideration that makes us stretch out our come sufferings so long. When we have shuffled off this mortal coil, After all, who would put up with all life’s Must give us pause. There’s the respect humiliations—the abuse from superiors, the 70 That makes calamity of so long life. insults of arrogant men, the pangs of For who would bear the whips and scorns of unrequited love, the inefficiency of the legal time, system, the rudeness of people in office, and Th' oppressor’s wrong, the proud man’s the mistreatment good people have to take contumely, from bad—when you could simply take out your The pangs of despised love, the law’s delay, knife and call it quits? Who would choose to The insolence of office, and the spurns grunt and sweat through an exhausting life, 75 That patient merit of th' unworthy takes, unless they were afraid of something dreadful When he himself might his quietus make after death, the undiscovered country from With a bare bodkin? Who would fardels bear, which no visitor returns, which we wonder 26 To grunt and sweat under a weary life, about without getting any answers from and But that the dread of something after death, which makes us stick to the evils we know 80 The undiscovered country from whose rather than rush off to seek the ones we don’t? bourn Fear of death makes us all cowards, and our No traveler returns, puzzles the will natural boldness becomes weak with too much And makes us rather bear those ills we have thinking. Actions that should be carried out at Than fly to others that we know not of? once get misdirected, and stop being actions at Thus conscience does make cowards of us all. But shh, here comes the beautiful Ophelia. all, Pretty lady, please remember me when you 85 And thus the native hue of resolution pray. Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought, And enterprises of great pith and moment With this regard their currents turn awry, And lose the name of action.—Soft you now, 90 The fair Ophelia!—Nymph, in thy orisons Be all my sins remembered. OPHELIA OPHELIA Good my lord, Hello, my lord, how have you been doing How does your honor for this many a day? lately? HAMLET HAMLET I humbly thank you. Well, well, well. Very well, thank you. Well, well, well. OPHELIA OPHELIA 95My lord, I have remembrances of yours My lord, I have some mementos of yours that That I have longèd long to redeliver. I’ve been meaning to give back to you for a I pray you now receive them. long time now. Please take them. 27  HAMLET HAMLET No, not I. I never gave you aught. No, it wasn’t me. I never gave you anything. OPHELIA My honored lord, you know right well you did, OPHELIA 100 And with them, words of so sweet breath My lord, you know very well that you did, and composed wrote letters to go along with them, letters so As made the things more rich. Their perfume sweetly written that they made your gifts even lost, more valuable. Their perfume is gone now, so Take these again, for to the noble mind take them back. Nice gifts lose their value Rich gifts wax poor when givers prove when the givers turn out not to be so nice. unkind. There, my lord. There, my lord. HAMLET HAMLET 105 Ha, ha, are you honest? Ha ha, are you good? OPHELIA OPHELIA My lord? Excuse me? HAMLET HAMLET Are you fair? Are you beautiful? OPHELIA OPHELIA What means your lordship? My lord, what are you talking about? 28  HAMLET HAMLET I’m just saying that if you’re good and That if you be honest and fair, your honesty beautiful, your goodness should have should admit no discourse to your beauty. nothing to do with your beauty. OPHELIA OPHELIA Could beauty, my lord, have better commerce But could beauty be related to anything than with honesty? better than goodness? HAMLET HAMLET Ay, truly, for the power of beauty will sooner Sure, since beauty’s power can more easily transform honesty from what it is to a bawd change a good girl into a whore than the than the force of honesty can translate beauty power of goodness can change a beautiful into his likeness. This was sometime a girl into a virgin. This used to be a great paradox, but now the time gives it proof. I did puzzle, but now I’ve solved it. I used to love love you once. you. OPHELIA OPHELIA You certainly made me believe you did, my Indeed, my lord, you made me believe so. lord. HAMLET HAMLET You should not have believed me, for virtue You shouldn’t have believed me, since we’re cannot so inoculate our old stock but we shall all rotten at the core, no matter how hard we relish of it. I loved you not. try to be virtuous. I didn’t love you. OPHELIA OPHELIA I was the more deceived. Then I guess I was misled. HAMLET HAMLET 29 Get thee to a nunnery. Why wouldst thou be a Get yourself to a convent at once. Why breeder of sinners? I am myself indifferent would you want to give birth to more sinners? honest, but yet I could accuse me of such I’m fairly good myself, but even so I could things that it were better my mother had not accuse myself of such horrible crimes that it borne me. would’ve been better if my mother had never I am very proud, revengeful, ambitious, with given birth to me. and I am arrogant, more offences at my beck than I have vengeful, ambitious, with more ill will in me thoughts to put them in, imagination to give than I can fit into my thoughts, and more than them shape, or time to act them in. What I have time to carry it out in. Why should should such fellows as I do crawling between people like me be crawling around between earth and heaven? We are arrant knaves, all. earth and heaven? Every one of us is a Believe none of us. Go thy ways to a nunnery. criminal. Don’t believe any of us. Hurry to a Where’s your father? convent. Where’s your father? OPHELIA OPHELIA At home, my lord. He’s at home, my lord. HAMLET HAMLET Let the doors be shut upon him, that he may Lock him in, so he can play the fool in his own play the fool no where but in ’s own house. home only. Good-bye. Farewell. OPHELIA OPHELIA 135 O, help him, you sweet heavens! Oh, dear God, please help him! 30 HAMLET HAMLET If thou dost marry, I’ll give thee this plague If you marry, I’ll give you this curse as your for thy dowry. Be thou as chaste as ice, as wedding present—be as clean as ice, as pure as pure as snow, thou shalt not escape the driven snow, and you’ll still get a bad calumny. Get thee to a nunnery, go. reputation. Get yourself to a convent, at once. Farewell. Or, if thou wilt needs marry, marry Good-bye. Or if you have to get married, marry a a fool, for wise men know well enough what fool, since wise men know far too well that you’ll monsters you make of them. To a nunnery, cheat on them. Good-bye. go, and quickly too. Farewell. OPHELIA OPHELIA Heavenly powers, restore him! Dear God, please make him normal again! HAMLET HAMLET I’ve heard all about you women and your I have heard of your paintings too, well cosmetics too. God gives you one face, but you enough. God has given you one face and paint another on top of it. You dance and prance you make yourselves another. You jig and and lisp; you call God’s creations by pet names, amble, and you lisp, you nickname God’s and you excuse your sexpot ploys by pleading creatures and make your wantonness your ignorance. Come on, I won’t stand for it ignorance. Go to, I’ll no more on ’t. It hath anymore. It’s driven me crazy. I hereby declare made me mad. I say, we will have no more we will have no more marriage. Whoever is marriages. Those that are married already, already married (except one person I know) will all but one, shall live. The rest shall keep as stay married—all but one person. Everyone else they are. To a nunnery, go. will have to stay single. Get yourself to a convent, fast. EXIT HAMLET HAMLET EXITS. OPHELIA OPHELIA 31 150 Oh, what a noble mind is here Oh, how noble his mind used to be, and how lost o'erthrown!— he is now! He used to have a gentleman’s grace, The courtier’s, soldier’s, scholar’s, eye, a scholar’s wit, and a soldier’s strength. He used tongue, sword, to be the jewel of our country, the obvious heir to Th' expectancy and rose of the fair state, the throne, the one everyone admired and The glass of fashion and the mould of form, imitated. And now he has fallen so low! And of Th' observed of all observers, quite, quite all the miserable women who once enjoyed down! hearing his sweet, seductive words, I am the 155 And I, of ladies most deject and most miserable. A mind that used to sing so wretched, sweetly is now completely out of tune, making That sucked the honey of his music vows, harsh sounds instead of fine notes. The Now see that noble and most sovereign unparalleled appearance and nobility he had in reason the full bloom of his youth has been ruined by Like sweet bells jangled, out of tune and madness. O, how miserable I am to see Hamlet harsh; now and know what he was before! That unmatched form and feature of blown youth 160 Blasted with ecstasy. Oh, woe is me, T' have seen what I have seen, see what I see! CLAUDIUS AND POLONIUS COME CLAUDIUS AND POLONIUS COME FORWARD FORWARD. CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS Love? His affections do not that way tend. Love? His feelings don’t move in that direction. Nor what he spake, though it lacked form a And his words, although they were a little little, disorganized, weren’t crazy. No, his sadness is Was not like madness. There’s something in hatching something, like a hen does sitting on his soul an egg. What hatches very well may be 32 165 O'er which his melancholy sits on brood, dangerous. So to prevent any harm being done, And I do doubt the hatch and the disclose I’ve made a quick executive decision: he’ll be Will be some danger—which for to prevent, sent to England to try to get back the money I have in quick determination they owe us. With any luck, the sea and new Thus set it down: he shall with speed to countries will push out these thoughts that have England somehow taken root in his mind. What do you 170 For the demand of our neglected tribute. think of this plan? Haply the seas and countries different With variable objects shall expel This something-settled matter in his heart, Whereon his brains still beating puts him thus 175 From fashion of himself. What think you on ’t? POLONIUS POLONIUS It shall do well. But yet do I believe It should work. But I still believe that his The origin and commencement of his grief madness was caused by unrequited Sprung from neglected love.—How now, love.—Hello, Ophelia. You don’t have to tell us Ophelia? what Lord Hamlet said. We heard You need not tell us what Lord Hamlet said. everything.—My lord, do whatever you like, but if 180 We heard it all.—My lord, do as you you like this idea, let his mother the queen get please. him alone and beg him to share his feelings with But, if you hold it fit, after the play her. I’ll hide and listen in. If she can’t find out Let his queen mother all alone entreat him what his secret is, then send him off to England To show his grief. Let her be round with him, or wherever you think best. And I’ll be placed, so please you, in the ear 185 Of all their conference. If she find him not, To England send him or confine him where 33 Your wisdom best shall think. CLAUDIUS CLAUDIUS It shall be so. That’s how we’ll do it, then. When important Madness in great ones must not unwatched people start to show signs of insanity, you have go. to watch them closely. Act 3 Scene 4: Gertrude sends for Hamlet as Polonius plans to hide in order to eavesdrop on Gertrude’s confrontation with her son. POLONIUS He will come straight. Look you lay home to POLONIUS him. He’ll come right away. Make sure you lay into Tell him his pranks have been too broad to him. Tell him his pranks have caused too bear with, much trouble, and that Your Highness has And that your grace hath screened and stood taken a lot of heat for them. I’ll be right here, between silent. Please be blunt with him. Much heat and him. I’ll silence me even here. 5 Pray you, be round with him. HAMLET HAMLET (within) Mother, mother, mother! (offstage) Mother, mother, mother! GERTRUDE GERTRUDE I’ll warrant you. Fear me not. Withdraw, I hear Don’t worry, I’ll do what you say. Now hide, I him coming. hear him coming. POLONIUS HIDES BEHIND THE POLONIUS HIDES BEHIND THE ARRAS TAPESTRY. 34 ENTER HAMLET HAMLET ENTERS. HAMLET HAMLET Now mother, what’s the matter? Now mother, what’s this all about? GERTRUDE GERTRUDE Hamlet, thou hast thy father much offended. Hamlet, you’ve insulted your father. HAMLET HAMLET 10 Mother, you have my father much Mother, you’ve insulted my father. offended. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE Come, come, you answer with an idle tongue. Come on, you’re answering me foolishly. HAMLET HAMLET Go, go, you question with a wicked tongue. Go on, you’re questioning me evilly. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE Why, how now, Hamlet? Hamlet, what, why? HAMLET HAMLET What’s the matter now? What’s the problem now? GERTRUDE GERTRUDE Have you forgot me? Have you forgotten who I am? HAMLET HAMLET No, by the rood, not so. For God’s sake no, I haven’t. You are the 15 You are the queen, your husband’s queen, your husband’s brother’s wife, and 35 brother’s wife, you are my mother, though I wish you And—would it were not so!—you are my weren’t. mother. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE In that case I’ll call in others who can still Nay, then I’ll set those to you that can speak. speak. HAMLET Come, come, and sit you down. You shall HAMLET not budge. No, sit down. You won’t budge until I hold a You go not till I set you up a glass mirror up to you, where you will see what’s 20 Where you may see the inmost part of deep inside you. you. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE What wilt thou do? Thou wilt not murder me? What are you going to do? You won’t kill me, Help, help, ho! will you? Help! POLONIUS POLONIUS (from behind the arras) What, ho? Help, (from behind the tapestry) Hey! Help, help, help, help! help! HAMLET HAMLET What’s this, a rat? I’ll bet a buck he’s a dead How now, a rat? Dead for a ducat, dead! rat now. (STABS HIS SWORD THROUGH THE (HE STABS HIS SWORD THROUGH THE ARRAS AND KILLS POLONIUS) TAPESTRY AND KILLS POLONIUS) 36 POLONIUS POLONIUS 25 (from behind the arras) Oh, I am slain. (from behind the tapestry) Oh, I’ve been killed! GERTRUDE GERTRUDE O me, what hast thou done? Oh my God, what have you done? HAMLET HAMLET Nay, I know not. Is it the king? I don’t know. Is it the king? GERTRUDE GERTRUDE Oh, what a rash and bloody deed is this! Oh, what a senseless, horrible act! HAMLET HAMLET A horrible act—almost as bad, my good A bloody deed? Almost as bad, good mother, mother, as killing a king and marrying his 30 As kill a king and marry with his brother. brother. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE As kill a king? Killing a king? HAMLET HAMLET Ay, lady, ’twas my word. That’s what I said, my good woman. (DRAWS BACK THE ARRAS AND (HE PULLS BACK THE TAPESTRY AND DISCOVERS POLONIUS) DISCOVERS POLONIUS) Thou wretched, rash, intruding fool, farewell. You low-life, nosy, busybody fool, goodbye. I I took thee for thy better. Take thy fortune. thought you were somebody more important. You’ve gotten what you deserve. I guess you Thou find’st to be too busy is some danger. found out it’s dangerous to be a busybody. 35 (to GERTRUDE) Leave wringing of your (toGERTRUDE) Stop wringing your hands. Sit 37 hands. Peace. Sit you down down and let me wring your heart instead, And let me wring your heart. For so I shall which I will do if it’s still soft enough, if your evil lifestyle has not toughened it against If it be made of penetrable stuff, feeling anything at all. If damnèd custom have not brassed it so That it is proof and bulwark against sense. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE 40 What have I done, that thou darest wag What have I done that you dare to talk to me thy tongue so rudely? In noise so rude against me? HAMLET HAMLET A deed that destroys modesty, turns virtue into Such an act hypocrisy, replaces the blossom on the face of That blurs the grace and blush of modesty, true love with a nasty blemish, makes Calls virtue hypocrite, takes off the rose marriage vows as false as a gambler’s From the fair forehead of an innocent love oath—oh, you’ve done a deed that plucks the 45 And sets a blister there, makes marriage soul out of marriage and turns religion into vows meaningless blather. Heaven looks down on As false as dicers' oaths—oh, such a deed this earth, as angry as if Judgment Day were As from the body of contraction plucks here, and is sick at the thought of what you’ve The very soul, and sweet religion makes done. A rhapsody of words. Heaven’s face doth glow 50 O'er this solidity and compound mass With tristful visage, as against the doom, Is thought-sick at the act GERTRUDE GERTRUDE C’mon, what’s this deed that sounds so awful Ay me, what act even before I know what it is? That roars so loud and thunders in the 38 index? HAMLET HAMLET Look at this picture here, and that one there, Look here upon this picture and on this, the painted images of two brothers. Look how 55 The counterfeit presentment of two kind and gentlemanly this one is, with his curly brothers. hair and his forehead like a Greek god. His See, what a grace was seated on this brow? eye could command like the god of war. His Hyperion’s curls, the front of Jove himself, body is as agile as Mercury just landing on a An eye like Mars to threaten and command, high hill. A station like the herald Mercury A figure and a combination of good qualities 60 New-lighted on a heaven-kissing hill— that seemed like every god had set his stamp A combination and a form indeed on this man. Where every god did seem to set his seal To That was your husband. Now look at this other give the world assurance of a man. one. Here is your present husband, like a This was your husband. Look you now, what mildewed ear of corn infecting the healthy one follows. next to it. Do you have eyes? How could you 65 Here is your husband, like a mildewed leave the lofty heights of this man here and ear descend as low as this one? Ha! Do you have Blasting his wholesome brother. Have you eyes? You cannot say you did it out of love, eyes? since at your age romantic passions have Could you on this fair mountain leave to feed grown weak, and the heart obeys reason. But And batten on this moor? Ha, have you what reason could move you from this one to eyes? that one? You must have some sense in your You cannot call it love, for at your age head, since you’re able to get around, but it 70 The heyday in the blood is tame, it’s seems to be paralyzed, since even if you were humble, crazy you would know the difference between And waits upon the judgment. And what these two men. No one ever went so insane judgment that they couldn’t get an easy choice like this Would step from this to this? Sense sure you one right. What devil was it that blindfolded have, you? Eyes without feeling, feeling without 39 Else could you not have motion. But sure sight, ears without hands or eyes, smell that sense without anything else, the use of even one Is apoplexed, for madness would not err, impaired sense would not permit such a 75 Nor sense to ecstasy was ne'er so mistake as yours. Oh, for shame, why aren’t thralled, you blushing? If evil can overtake even an old But it reserved some quantity of choice mother’s bones, then let it melt my own. It To serve in such a difference. What devil turns out it’s no longer shameful to act on was ’t impulse—now that the old are doing so, and That thus hath cozened you at now that reason is a servant to desire. hoodman-blind? Eyes without feeling, feeling without sight, 80 Ears without hands or eyes, smelling sans all, Or but a sickly part of one true sense Could not so mope. O shame, where is thy blush? Rebellious hell, If thou canst mutine in a matron’s bones, 85 To flaming youth let virtue be as wax And melt in her own fire. Proclaim no shame When the compulsive ardor gives the charge, Since frost itself as actively doth burn, And reason panders will. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE O Hamlet, speak no more! Oh, Hamlet, stop! You’re making me look into 90 Thou turn’st mine eyes into my very soul, my very soul, where the marks of sin are so And there I see such black and grainèd thick and black they will never be washed spots away. 40  As will not leave their tinct. HAMLET Nay, but to live HAMLET In the rank sweat of an enseamèd bed, Yes, and you lie in the sweaty stench of your Stewed in corruption, honeying and making dirty sheets, wet with corruption, making love love— 95 Over the nasty sty— GERTRUDE GERTRUDE O, speak to me no more! Oh, you must stop! Your words are like These words like daggers enter in my ears. daggers. Please, no more, sweet Hamlet. No more, sweet Hamlet. Hamlet advises Gertrude how to behave from on now that she has learnt the truth. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE O Hamlet, thou hast cleft my heart in twain. Oh Hamlet, you’ve broken my heart in two! HAMLET HAMLET Oh, throw away the worser part of it, Then throw away the worse half, and live a 160 And live the purer with the other half. purer life with the other! Good night to you. But Good night—but go not to mine uncle’s bed. don’t go to my uncle’s bed tonight. At least Assume a virtue if you have it not. pretend to be virtuous, even if you’re not. Habit That monster, custom, who all sense doth eat, is a terrible thing, in that it’s easy to get used to Of habits devil, is angel yet in this: doing evil without feeling bad about it. But it’s 165That to the use of actions fair and good also a good thing, in that being good can also He likewise gives a frock or livery become a habit. That aptly is put on. Refrain tonight, Say no to sex tonight, and that will make it 41 And that shall lend a kind of easiness easier to say no the next time, and still easier To the next abstinence, the next more easy. the time after that. Habit can change even one’s 170 For use almost can change the stamp of natural instincts, and either rein in the devil in nature, us, or kick him out. Once again, good night to And either rein the devil or throw him out you, and when you want to repent, I’ll ask you With wondrous potency. Once more, good for your blessing too. I’m sorry about what night, happened to this gentleman (pointing to And when you are desirous to be blessed, POLONIUS), but I’ll blessing beg of you. (points toPOLONIUS) God wanted to punish me with this murder, and 175 For this same lord, this man with me, so I’m both Heaven’s I do repent. But heaven hath pleased it so, executioner and its minister of justice. This is To punish me with this and this with me, bad, but it’ll get worse soon. Oh, and one other That I must be their scourge and minister. thing, madam. I will bestow him and will answer well 180 The death I gave him. So, again, good night. I must be cruel only to be kind. Thus bad begins and worse remains behind. 42 Act 4 Scene 5: After the death of her father, Ophelia wishes to speak to the Queen ENTER HORATIO, GERTRUDE, AND A HORATIO, GERTRUDE, AND A GENTLEMAN GENTLEMAN ENTER. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE I will not speak with her. I won’t speak to her. GENTLEMAN GENTLEMAN She is importunate, She’s insistent. In fact, she’s crazed. You can’t Indeed distract. Her mood will needs be help feeling sorry for her. pitied. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE What would she have? What does she want? GENTLEMAN GENTLEMAN She speaks much of her father, says she She talks about her father a lot, and says she hears hears there are conspiracies around the world, 5 There’s tricks i' th' world, and hems, and and coughs, and beats her breast, and gets beats her heart, angry over tiny matters, and talks nonsense. Spurns enviously at straws, speaks things in Her words don’t mean anything, but her doubt babbling causes her listeners to draw That carry but half sense. Her speech is conclusions. They hear what they want to nothing, hear. Her winks and nods and gestures do Yet the unshaped use of it doth move suggest that she means to convey a message, The hearers to collection. They aim at it, and not a happy one. 10 And botch the words up fit to their own thoughts, Which, as her winks and nods and gestures yield them, 43 Indeed would make one think there might be thought, Though nothing sure, yet much unhappily. HORATIO HORATIO 'Twere good she were spoken with, for she It’s a good idea to speak to her, since she may strew might lead those with evil intentions to 15 Dangerous conjectures in ill-breeding dangerous conclusions. minds. GERTRUDE GERTRUDE Let her come in. Show her in. EXIT GENTLEMAN THE GENTLEMAN EXITS. (aside) To my sick soul (as sin’s true nature (to herself) To my sick soul (since sin is is) always a sickness), every detail looks like an Each toy seems prologue to some great omen of disaster to come. Guilt makes you so amiss. full of stupid suspicions that you give yourself So full o