Empathy Skill 1: Perspective Taking
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Questions and Answers

What is the first empathy skill mentioned in the text?

  • Self-awareness
  • Emotional regulation
  • Perspective taking (correct)
  • Active listening

    • What shapes our unique perspective on the world?

  • Our age, race, and ethnicity only
  • Our friends and family's opinions
  • Our experiences, knowledge, and individual characteristics (correct)
  • Only our upbringing and education

    • Why do people have different perspectives on the same event?

  • Because they have different opinions
  • Because they have different intuitions
  • Because they have different personalities
  • Because they have different life experiences (correct)

    • What is a common mistake people make when trying to practice empathy?

    <p>Thinking that we can take off our own lenses and see through someone else's</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What can we do instead of trying to take off our own lenses?

    <p>Honor people's perspectives as truth even when they're different from ours</p> Signup and view all the answers

    When are children most receptive to learning perspective-taking skills?

    <p>When they're naturally curious about the world</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the benefit of being taught perspective-taking skills as a child?

    <p>It makes us more open to others' perspectives</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the default perspective that is often reinforced in majority cultures?

    <p>The default perspective of the majority culture</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the foundation of connection according to the text?

    <p>Empathy</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is required to stand in discomfort with people who are processing shame, or hurt, or disappointment?

    <p>Courage</p> Signup and view all the answers

    According to June Jordan, who can bring about change?

    <p>We ourselves</p> Signup and view all the answers

    Why does the author share their personal story with their staff?

    <p>To help them understand their commitment to building a supportive environment</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What does leading through the lens of multiple perspectives and experiences make the author?

    <p>More approachable</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What happens when the author lacks self-awareness as a leader?

    <p>They limit the perspective and insights they can share</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the result of sharing stories and practicing vulnerability?

    <p>It gives others permission to practice vulnerability</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the key to understanding how much someone cares?

    <p>How much they care</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is required to acquire perspective-taking skills as an adult?

    <p>Working harder and fighting armoring up</p> Signup and view all the answers

    Why is it important to include diverse perspectives in a team?

    <p>To get a full picture of the world and meet people's needs</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the outcome of hiring and casting people who are similar to those in powerful positions?

    <p>A lack of diversity and a narrow perspective</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the key to understanding someone's perspective?

    <p>Respecting their truth as a full truth</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the benefit of social media according to Beyoncé?

    <p>It's a democratic platform where everyone has a say</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the relationship between inclusivity, innovation, and performance?

    <p>Inclusivity is positively correlated with innovation and performance</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is required to become a learner and take on someone's perspective?

    <p>Becoming the learner</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the outcome of including diverse perspectives in a team or organization?

    <p>A full picture of the world and meeting people's needs</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What was the author's plan after finishing the leadership program at Fort Bragg?

    <p>To return the rental car and catch a flight from Raleigh-Durham International Airport</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is implied about Ellen's experience with field hockey?

    <p>She had to work hard to make the team and enjoyed her time playing</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the inference about Steve and the author's genetic influence on their children?

    <p>They have no genetic gifts to pass on to their kids when it comes to land sports</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the author's goal in terms of timing for the big game?

    <p>To land back in Houston two hours before the big game</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the primary reason why asking for help is a sign of strength?

    <p>It requires a relationship of trust.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is implied about Suzanne's role in the story?

    <p>She was the president and COO who facilitated the leadership program</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the outcome of operating in a space of nonjudgment?

    <p>We can talk about our feelings without fear of judgment.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the author's role in the story?

    <p>The facilitator of the leadership program at Fort Bragg</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is essential for braving trust?

    <p>Self-awareness and personal accountability.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the context of the story about the author's experience at Fort Bragg?

    <p>A leadership program</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What does the story imply about the author's personality?

    <p>The author is meticulous and likes to plan ahead</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is required for living BIG and generosity?

    <p>Boundaries in place.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the result of embracing personal accountability?

    <p>Courage to change.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the key to being brave enough to do what's right?

    <p>Knowing who we are and what we're about.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the relationship between self-awareness and personal accountability?

    <p>They are complementary.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the benefit of being a good listener?

    <p>It makes us better leaders.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What did Suzanne do after the author said they didn't understand?

    <p>She pulled back a bit but stayed right with the author</p> Signup and view all the answers

    Why is it important to engage and stay connected with someone?

    <p>To show empathy and understanding</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is required to create a more connected culture?

    <p>Empathy and vulnerability</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is a benefit of practicing empathy?

    <p>It creates a more connected culture</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What did Melinda Gates do after leaving Microsoft?

    <p>She focused on her philanthropic work and family</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the result of Melinda and Bill Gates' work together?

    <p>Improving equity in the United States and around the world</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is important to let go of when trying to practice empathy?

    <p>All of the above</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is a key element of creating a connected culture?

    <p>Vulnerability</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the primary reason why people judge others?

    <p>Because they are trying to offload their own shame</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is a key element in staying nonjudgmental?

    <p>Being aware of our own shame and vulnerabilities</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What happens when we judge others?

    <p>We offload our own shame and hurt</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the outcome of having a shaming, judgmental culture in an organization?

    <p>Poor customer service</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is essential for practicing empathy?

    <p>Being curious and open to learning</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the result of staying in a space of nonjudgment?

    <p>Improved relationships with others</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is a common reason why people judge others?

    <p>Because they are doing worse than them</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the outcome of building self-worth and confidence?

    <p>Less judgment towards others</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What does the phrase 'Me too' imply when someone is in struggle?

    <p>Understanding and connection with the person's experience</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the difference between empathy and sympathy?

    <p>Empathy is feeling with someone, while sympathy is feeling sorry for them</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What happens when someone feels sorry for us?

    <p>We feel more ashamed and alone</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the result of someone feeling with us in our struggle?

    <p>We feel more connected and less alone</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the problem with responding with 'Oh, you poor thing'?

    <p>It makes the person feel more ashamed and alone</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the goal of the Me Too movement?

    <p>To address the prevalence of sexual harassment and assault</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the difference between the empathic and sympathetic response?

    <p>Empathic response is 'I get it', while sympathetic response is 'I feel sorry for you'</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the impact of the empathic response on the person sharing their struggle?

    <p>It makes them feel more connected and normal</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the primary difference between shame resistance and shame resilience?

    <p>Shame resistance is about avoiding shame, while shame resilience is about moving through shame.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    Why is empathy an essential ingredient for teams who take risks and show up for rumbles?

    <p>Because empathy is a key element of trust and connection.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the primary benefit of shame resilience?

    <p>It allows us to move through shame with more courage and compassion.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    Why is self-compassion crucial for shame resilience?

    <p>Because self-compassion helps us reach out to others for empathy.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the primary reason why shame is a social concept?

    <p>Because shame happens between people, and heals best between people.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the relationship between empathy and shame?

    <p>Empathy is the real antidote to shame.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the primary difference between sympathy and empathy?

    <p>Sympathy is about feeling sorry for someone, while empathy is about feeling with someone.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the primary benefit of practicing empathy and self-compassion?

    <p>It helps us connect with others on a deeper level.</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the main purpose of the BRAVING Inventory?

    <p>To guide conversations with colleagues and build trust</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the significance of the acronym BRAVING?

    <p>It is a reminder that trust is a vulnerable and courageous process</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the purpose of the saying 'Knowledge is only rumor until it lives in the bones'?

    <p>To highlight the significance of practice in learning</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the primary goal of using the BRAVING Inventory with colleagues?

    <p>To build trust and transform relationships</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the significance of the 'Boundaries' element in the BRAVING Inventory?

    <p>It represents the willingness to say no and respect others' boundaries</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the relationship between the BRAVING Inventory and values?

    <p>The BRAVING Inventory is used to discuss values with colleagues</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the outcome of using the BRAVING Inventory in a team setting?

    <p>It results in more effective communication and trust-building</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the significance of the 'Reliability' element in the BRAVING Inventory?

    <p>It represents the ability to deliver on commitments and balance priorities</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the outcome of gossiping or secret sharing according to the author?

    <p>A moment of counterfeit connection</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the correct definition of integrity according to the author?

    <p>Choosing what's right over what's fun, fast, or easy</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is a major obstacle to integrity in today's culture, according to the author?

    <p>Prioritizing fun, fast, and easy options</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the benefit of having an integrity partner, according to the author?

    <p>To practice integrity and improve accountability</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the author's experience with doing meaningful things in life?

    <p>They are usually hard and take time</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the primary reason for the perception of a lack of integrity, according to the author?

    <p>Cutting corners and taking shortcuts</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the purpose of role-playing with an integrity partner, according to the author?

    <p>To practice having hard conversations</p> Signup and view all the answers

    What is the outcome of perceiving someone as lacking integrity, according to the author?

    <p>Instant wariness and distrust</p> Signup and view all the answers

    Study Notes

    Empathy Skill #1: Perspective Taking

    • Empathy involves seeing the world from others' perspectives, which is unique due to factors like age, race, ethnicity, ability, spiritual beliefs, knowledge, insights, and experiences.
    • Ten people can witness the same incident and have ten different perspectives on what happened, how it happened, and why it happened.
    • While math and science provide universal truths, human emotions, behavior, language, and cognition have many valid perspectives.

    Perspective Taking Challenges

    • A common mistake is believing we can take off our own lenses and look through someone else's, but our lenses are inherent to who we are.
    • We can honor people's perspectives as truth, even when they differ from ours.
    • Those raised in majority cultures may be taught that their perspective is the correct one, making it challenging to adopt perspective-taking skills.

    Learning Empathy

    • Children are receptive to learning perspective-taking skills due to their natural curiosity.
    • Those taught perspective-taking skills as children owe a debt of gratitude to their parents.

    Connection through Empathy

    • Empathy is the core of connection, allowing us to stand with people in discomfort and acknowledge their emotions.
    • Empathy can be learned, and it's essential for connection and courage.

    Practicing Vulnerability

    • Sharing personal stories helps people understand how much you care, making you more approachable and relatable.
    • Vulnerability gives others permission to share their stories and be brave in sharing their life journeys.

    Becoming Self-Aware

    • Self-awareness is crucial for leaders to understand their intentions, thoughts, feelings, and actions.
    • Without self-awareness, leaders limit the perspectives and insights they can share with their team.

    Inclusivity and Innovation

    • Inclusive environments that value diverse perspectives lead to innovation and better performance.
    • Respect for diverse truths and perspectives leads to a fuller understanding of the world and better decision-making.

    Braving Trust

    • Asking for help is a sign of strength and reflects self-awareness, an essential element in braving trust.
    • Operating in a space of non-judgment allows for open communication and vulnerability without fear of judgment.

    Generosity and Boundaries

    • Generosity requires boundaries to be in place to maintain integrity and make assumptions about others' intentions, words, and actions.
    • Daring Leadership has changed the way leaders work with their teams, making them better listeners and braver in dealing with challenges.

    Empathy and Courage

    • Empathy is a crucial skill that can be learned and practiced, and it's essential to distinguish it from sympathy.
    • Barriers to empathy must be understood, and specific skills can be developed to practice empathy.
    • Empathy involves engaging, staying curious, and staying connected with others, letting go of the fear of saying the wrong thing or fixing the situation.

    Leadership and Vulnerability

    • Leaders like Melinda Gates, co-chair of the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, model courage-building and empathy in their work, creating a more connected culture.
    • Melinda Gates' background includes developing multimedia products at Microsoft and later focusing on philanthropic work and family before co-founding the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation with her husband.

    Shame Resilience

    • Shame resistance is not possible, but shame resilience is possible, teachable, and within reach for all of us.
    • Shame resilience is the ability to practice authenticity when experiencing shame, move through the experience without sacrificing values, and come out with more courage, compassion, and connection.
    • Shame resilience is about moving from shame to empathy, which is the real antidote to shame.

    Empathy

    • Empathy is one of the linchpins of cultures built on connection and trust.
    • Empathy is an essential ingredient for teams that take risks and show up for rumbles.
    • There are five elements to empathy, which are easily confused with sympathy, giving advice, and judgment disguised as concern.
    • Empathy Skill #2: being nonjudgmental, which is not easy, especially when we enjoy judging.
    • We judge in areas where we're most susceptible to shame, and we judge people who are doing worse than we are in those areas.

    The Importance of Empathy

    • When we share our story with someone who responds with empathy and understanding, shame can't survive.
    • Empathy is the social balm that heals social wounds.
    • Self-compassion is also critically important, as it allows us to be gentle with ourselves in the midst of shame, making us more likely to reach out, connect, and experience empathy.

    Empathy vs. Sympathy

    • Empathy is feeling with, while sympathy is feeling for.
    • The empathic response is "I get it, I feel with you, and I've been there."
    • The sympathetic response is "I feel sorry for you" and can magnify feelings of being alone.

    Trust and the BRAVING Inventory

    • Trust is a vulnerable and courageous process that requires seven behaviors: Boundaries, Reliability, Accountability, Vault, Integrity, Nonjudgment, and Generosity.
    • The BRAVING Inventory is a rumble tool that helps build trust and facilitates deep change in relationships.
    • The inventory is used to identify areas of trust and mistrust in teams and individuals.

    The Seven Elements of Trust

    • Boundaries: respecting and communicating boundaries.
    • Reliability: doing what you say you'll do and staying aware of your competencies and limitations.
    • Accountability: taking responsibility for your actions and their impact.
    • Vault: respecting confidentiality and not sharing secrets.
    • Integrity: choosing courage over comfort, what's right over what's fun, fast, or easy, and practicing your values.
    • Nonjudgment: being nonjudgmental and not making assumptions.
    • Generosity: assuming the best intentions of others and being generous with your time and resources.

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    Description

    This quiz explores the concept of perspective taking, understanding how our unique lenses shape our worldview, and how it relates to empathy.

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