Unpacking the SELF - Sexual Self PDF

Unpacking the SELF *Physical Self *Sexual Self *Material Self *Spiritual Self *Political Self *Digital Self  *Sexual Orientation - refers to a person’s pattern of emotional, romantic or sexual attraction (either people of op...

Unpacking the SELF *Physical Self *Sexual Self *Material Self *Spiritual Self *Political Self *Digital Self  *Sexual Orientation - refers to a person’s pattern of emotional, romantic or sexual attraction (either people of opposite sex or people of the same sex)  *The generation in todays’ society’s sexual behavior has diverse form. *Distinction between normal and abnormal sexual behavior is quite not easy to define. Example: It is common for partners to have the sexual act in the bedroom, but others prefer to have it in the living room or in the bathroom and yet not be called abnormal. Probably, it is normal if one considers the psychological consequences of his/her sexual behavior. It is abnormal if sexual behavior causes distress, anxiety, guilty feelings or it harms other person. *It is most appropriate to recognize that normal sexual behavior is one dictated primarily by society’s cultural values and beliefs.  Basic Sexual Behavior 1. Masturbation or Solitary Sex - is a sexual self-satisfaction - men and women typically start to masturbate at different ages ranging from 5 – 21 years old  Basic Sexual Behavior 1. Masturbation or Solitary Sex - attitudes toward it is still negative - however, most experts see it as healthy, legitimate and harmless sexual activity  Basic Sexual Behavior 2. Heterosexuality - an attraction and interest towards the other sex Homosexuality - an attraction and interest towards the same sex  Basic Sexual Behavior 3. Premarital Sex - any sexual activity with a partner before he/she has started a married life - particularly for women was a major taboo, generally in Filipino values  Basic Sexual Behavior 3. Premarital Sex *Men were more or less allowed to engage in premarital sex but they were advised to marry “virgins”. This idea is allowed for males but not permitted to females is termed double standard.  Basic Sexual Behavior 4. Marital Sex - is the most standard and acceptable sexual behavior, and generally the gauge of wedded bliss  Basic Sexual Behavior 5. Extramarital Sex - is a practice between a married person and someone who is not his/her spouse What is LOVE?  *Love - is exceedingly difficult to define but it is also part of what makes a man human *Researchers try to be more comfortable measuring the idea of attachment, intimacy, companionship and infatuation which are related to and always treated as a measure of love  *Types of Love 1. Passionate Love - also known as romantic love - an intense longing for union with one another - people overlook faults and shortcomings and tried to avoid conflicts  *Types of Love 1. Passionate Love - is short lived which usually last only for months *Because of too much familiarity, little by little, disillusion and frustration set in  *Types of Love 2. Companionate Love - lesser intense feeling than passionate love - characterized by friendly affection and a deep caring attachment based on familiarity of the loved one.  *Types of Love 2. Companionate Love - involves commitment and nurturing of the partnership - more enduring and lasting than the passionate love Type of love Meaning Love catalyst How to show Eros Romantic Body Physical Touches Philia Affectionate Mind Share Beliefs Storage Familial Memories Show Gratitude Agape Selfless Spirit Be kind Ludus Playful Emotion Flirting Smiling Pragma Mature Subconscious Show interest Philautia Self-love Soul Respect Appreciate Mania Objective Survival Not shown but possessive  *Passion - is a motivational component that ignite romantic feelings, physical attraction and desire for sexual interaction - creates deeper desire to be together with loved one  *Intimacy - is an emotional component of love that encompasses the sense of bonding with the person - includes willingness to help others and openness to one’s private feelings, and thought with the beloved partner  *Commitment - is a cognitive component of love - involves purposely investing in the relationship with commitment partners regularly, routinely, and predictably attends to each other and their relationship no matter how they feel Why do people fall in LOVE?  *Why do people fall in love? 1. People fall in love to overcome loneliness and separateness 2. People desire a form of union is the deepest need of human person 3. People when they are in their own solitariness, longed for a refuge in union and love  *Why do people fall in love? 4. Love relationship is an aspect of a person’s social network instead of a cure to one’s loneliness 5. People fall in love most often has no clear explanation why he/she fell in love with this particular person and not the other one  *Attachment - means an intense bond that develops between two individuals, either between infant and the parent or between adults and lovers *One way that develops attachment is rooted in infancy.  *Love Myth #1 Myth: Love is blind Truth: It sees but it doesn’t mind  *Love Myth #2 Myth: Jealousy proves love Truth: Jealousy proves insecurity and fear  *Love Myth #3 Myth: Real love means “I can’t live without you” Truth: It is a sign of dependency and mistaken thinking that it is love  *Love Myth #4 Myth: Love at first sight Truth: Attraction and love are two very different things  *Love Myth #5 Myth: Love equals sex Truth: It is possible to have a healthy sexuality, love someone, and not sleep together  *Love Myth #6 Myth: Being loving meant one to always had to give in and say “yes” Truth: Saying “no” is often an act of healthy love  *Love Myth #7 Myth: Romantic love is between male and female only. Truth: Gender doesn’t matter. Feelings do.