How to Win Friends: Chapter 1 Flashcards

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Questions and Answers

Who was known as 'Two Gun' Crowley?

A mobster who killed a police officer (correct)

A police officer

A famous singer

A notorious bank robber

What principle does Al Capone's statement illustrate?

Perception dictates people's beliefs of right and wrong.

What does it mean to understand the other side?

To understand the perception of the other side.

What principle did Ben Franklin follow regarding language?

To ensure that his language was not too certain or able to make someone else feel wrong. Signup and view all the answers

Why is criticism considered futile?

Because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes them justify themselves. Signup and view all the answers

What was the safety coordinator's approach to getting workers to wear hard hats?

He asked employees if they were uncomfortable and reminded them about safety. Signup and view all the answers

What lesson can be learned from Abraham Lincoln's duel incident?

Don't say something you wouldn't say to someone's face. Signup and view all the answers

How did Lincoln view the performance of his generals?

He chose not to criticize them, understanding their circumstances. Signup and view all the answers

What did Abraham Lincoln do with his angry letter to General Meade?

He wrote it but did not send it. Signup and view all the answers

What does Confucius advise regarding judgment?

Don't complain about snow on your neighbor's roof when your own doorstep is unclean. Signup and view all the answers

What did Dale Carnegie feel about the minor criticism he received from Richard Harding Davis?

He was upset by it. Signup and view all the answers

What did Ben Franklin promise regarding his speech?

He would speak ill of no man and speak all the good he knows of everybody. Signup and view all the answers

What principle did Thomas Carlyle express about greatness?

A great man shows his greatness by the way he treats little men. Signup and view all the answers

What was Bob Hoover's response to a potentially deadly mistake?

He chose to remain calm and not yell at the attendant. Signup and view all the answers

What lesson does 'Father Forgets' illustrate about parent-child relationships?

Parents should refrain from criticism and be loving. Signup and view all the answers

What is the importance of thinking criticism but not speaking it?

It allows for inner reflection while avoiding unnecessary conflict. Signup and view all the answers

What point is made about God's judgment in relation to human criticism?

If God waits until the end of one's life to criticize, we should do the same. Signup and view all the answers

Study Notes

Notable Figures and Concepts

"Two Gun" Crowley: Killed a police officer in the 1930s; executed with electric chair; claimed he was defending himself. Illustrates that individuals rarely criticize themselves for their wrongdoings.
Al Capone: Famous criminal who stated he spent his life bringing pleasure to others, while only receiving abuse. Reflects the tendency of people to perceive themselves as not in the wrong.
Abraham Lincoln: Critiqued for his critics of government officials; exhibited humility and empathy by not criticizing generals during the Civil War, understanding their circumstances.

Principles of Communication

Understanding the Other Side: Engaging empathically with differing perspectives fosters better interactions.
Futility of Criticism: Criticism provokes defensiveness, harms pride, and breeds resentment; it is counterproductive for effective communication.
Ben Franklin's Approach: Advocated for careful language to avoid making others feel wrong, promoting a constructive dialogue.

Practical Examples

Hard Hat Compliance: A safety coordinator shifted from authoritative yelling to inquiring about employee discomfort, leading to better compliance with safety protocols.
Lincoln’s Duel: Almost faced duel for criticizing a politician anonymously, showing potential consequences of indirect criticism.

Historical Insights

Letters Not Sent: Lincoln refrained from sending an angry letter to General Meade after avoiding engagement with Lee's troops; emphasizes the value of restraint in communication.
Confucius Wisdom: Advocated for self-improvement over judging others, highlighting the importance of self-reflection before criticism.

Personal Reflections

Dale Carnegie's Experience: Felt relief over his biting criticism of a deceased critic, showing resentment can linger but is counterproductive.
Bob Hoover Incident: A pilot remained calm after a potentially deadly mistake, signifying that punitive reactions after realizing a mistake don't contribute to a solution.

Emotional Awareness

"Father Forgets" Poem: Portrays a father who reflexively criticizes his son but chooses love and understanding instead, emphasizing emotional connection over criticism.
Thoughts of Improvement: It’s natural to think critically about others, but sharing those criticisms can be harmful; focus internally on personal growth.
Divine Non-Judgment: The idea that even a higher power observes without immediate judgment suggests humanity should approach criticism with patience and understanding.

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Description

Test your knowledge with flashcards from Chapter 1 of 'How to Win Friends and Influence People'. Learn about key figures and principles illustrated in the text, including insights into human behavior and self-justification. Perfect for reinforcing your understanding and memorization!