Estate Planning: The Perils of Wills

The Dangers of Creating a Will

• Making a will has the potential to disrupt both peace of mind and family harmony.
• Dividing property is often seen as responsible.
• The creation of a will can introduce greed and conflict among family members.

The Illusion of Control

• Elderly individuals might believe their assets represent their true wealth.
• A person’s peace of mind is actually their most valuable asset.
• Property's significance diminishes after death, while peace of mind is irreplaceable.
• The process of dividing property can be a source of anxiety and disputes
• Maintaining secrecy around a will can result in a significant emotional burden.

The Case of Rajesh and Rajni Agarwal

• Rajesh and Rajni Agarwal are a fictional family with three sons and two daughters.
• The eldest son is financially independent and lives in the US.
• The other two sons manage the family business and rental properties in India.
• The family initially enjoys harmony and celebrates events together.

The Seeds of Discord

• Issues arise when Rajesh Agarwal considers dividing the property among his children.
• Disputes erupt over the perceived value and distribution of assets.
• Despite his financial stability, the son in the US feels entitled to a larger share.
• Siblings begin to gossip and harbor resentment towards one another.
• The daughters feel they are not receiving a fair share of the inheritance.
• Even grandchildren become embroiled in the conflict, creating further division.

The Inevitability of Unrest

• Greed is difficult to quell once awakened, leading to dissatisfaction and conflict.
• Each family member develops their own rationale for why they deserve more.
• A perfect solution is unlikely because individual circumstances differ greatly.
• Attempting to divide assets equitably could destroy the peace and happiness within a family.

Personal Experience

• Anecdote about hearing from my dad about friends whose family split due to discussion about dividing assets

The Case of Ravi

• Example of Ravi who wanted to split the house between his daughter and son.
• Ravi's wife got angry, because she perceived that there was no value being placed on her and her son, since they lived in the house with him.

The Importance of Non-Intervention

• After someone dies, the living are responsible for solving the property dispute.
• Trying to solve the dispute is not worth unnecessary stress.
• As the will-maker, you cannot be biased toward family members.
• A perfect, airtight will is impossible because there are too many external factors that could influence plans.

Self-Centeredness and Acceptance

• Elderly individuals should prioritize their own well-being and peace of mind.
• Should not try to solve and analyze the needs of each family member
• Should not try to rate relationships with family members to give rewards or punishments
• Property issues are something to avoid involving yourself in.
• Property issues are a puzzle that cannot be solved.
• Trying to solve the puzzles is a recipe for ruining family relationships.
• A will is often a "Jinn" or spirit that should be kept inside its bottled
• Lawyers often disagree and encourage people to make wills as that is their source of income
• Once someone dies, the property dispute is for those alive to figure out